President Obama has written a children's book! "Obama shares dreams for his kids in book on 13 Americans," reads the USA Today headline. Fox Nation has a slightly different take, though: "Obama Praises Indian Chief Who Killed U.S. General." Hmmm.

Last night was football night and magazine night in America! New York hosted both the National Magazine Awards and the first round of the NFL Draft. Which one was better? Which was more embarrassing? Which had Anna Wintour?

You know, we sympathize with just-resigned Atlantic City Mayor Robert W. Levy's personal health situation and all. The heretofore absent-without-say-so city leader turned up earlier this week after spending the last couple of weeks hiding out at home and at a clinic for substance abuse and depression. If we'd been consulted, we might have recommended a subtler exit strategy from his job—say, an apparently spontaneous trip to visit long-lost relatives in outer Mongolia! Or perhaps a sudden deep and abiding devotion to the melting of the polar ice caps, necessitating an in-person look-see? Hell, if Levy had said he'd taken a day trip to Trenton, everyone would have just assumed he was recovering from gunshot wounds someplace, no big deal.