We're not sure if the following Craigslist ad for a nanny is real or a spoof. On one hand, it's not quite over-the-top enough to be fake. On the other hand: "This job is very nontraditional in the sense that my kids are older and still need someone to "parent" them 24/7. My oldest son will be starting his first year at Columbia in the fall and will not be around much, but, will probably still need support. Picking up his dry cleaning, if he needs anything for his apartment, scheduling doctor appointments, anything to help him and his daily life run smoothly"?! (You'll also be "interfacing with" the family's assistants.)

"Police have arrested 16 men in a prostitution sting in which they posted an ad for sex on Craigslist.org." "Craigslist prostitution sting nets 8 arrests." "10 men arrested. The department launched the sting using an advertisement for "sexual activities" on the online classified site Craigslist.org." I see one of these stories every few hours, every day — and recognize them for what they are: Your local police department's press releases. Here's how it goes when law enforcement go laptop to laptop with prostitutes, in your neighborhood!Cops pose as clients, set dates, show up. They may even fuck — it's actually legal for a vice officer to have sex as part of their job. The prostitutes are arrested, their names and photos sent to the local press. After a night in jail, they're out again, even more likely to head back to Craigslist to pay off the bail they just had to post. What remains long after they've been released from custody: news reports with their face and legal name, pats on the back to the city or county cops for another job well done, and see you ladies to do this again next week.

An addition to the Barackathon at the San Francisco ballot box this November: a measure to decriminalize prostitution among consenting adults. City officials are already complaining it will hinder their efforts to prosecute related crimes, or that its passage will be "a welcome mat for prostitutes and pimps to come and hang out in San Francisco." Such talk conjures images of throngs of pimps 'n' hos crowding SF sidewalks. But most prostitution is now hidden indoors, and marketed on the Internet, as a member of the organization sponsoring the vote, the Erotic Service Providers Union, explained to local CBS news reporters. (I don't expect anyone from Craigslist to weigh in on the topic, but the site links to ESPU atop its Erotic Services section — making Craig Newmark a very low-key sugar daddy.)

We heard from plenty of friends and acquaintances who were tragically shut out of The Dark Knight's opening-weekend Bat-magic; having procrastinated on purchasing IMAX tickets, it was a tough week to be a casual moviegoer and partake of history's biggest smash. Thank God for Craigslist, we suppose, where at least if you can withstand the Joker-costumed throngs queued up around the block for their fourth viewing, a deal awaits — if you call $60 for two ducats a "deal":

This went up yesterday, and it's still live, so your summer could be made! "So here's the deal... I'm usually in the Hamptons with my girlfriend at my folks house, not far from the town of West Hampton. However, luck would have it that my folks are going away for a week and we're at the house alone. We like to mix it up and have fun with another guy, keeps our relationship interesting and fresh. She's only into guys but knows I like getting it on with another guy while she either watches or gets involved. So what I'm offering is this... if you're looking to get away from the madness of your share house this weekend and looking to stay with us for a couple of nights, let me know how willing you are to please us... sexually. If we think it matches with our style, we'll expect you this evening. Here's a picture of me for starters..."

"You asked if I was headed upstairs for a meeting and I said, "not exactly. I am here for GoogleApps." Oh, Pink Scarf Girl. We want to find your Missed Connections "Moment" Man, too. White, male, 20s, dressed casual? Who could that be? Just be sure to use protection with what you're grabbing "downstairs," too. The best in daycare is so pricey these days.

Why wait in line for a 3G iPhone when a "5'10 Italian, clean no drugs no std's" "m4w" will give you one in exchange for a little creative action in bed? Interested parties need only check out the Craigslist ad for more details. We'll echo the words of this m4w: "Good luck ladies."

Very funny, Bushwick kids! This ad is for a $385-per-month room in a Brooklyn apartment. You'll share the apartment with two other people, and the room with a gorilla. Seriously: "BEDROOM MUST BE SHARED WITH APPROX. 700 LB. ADULT MALE SILVERBACK GORILLA. THIS IS AN EASTERN LOWLAND GORILLA WHO IS FAIRLY DOCILE... AND HAS SOMEWHAT OF AN INTENSE SEXUAL APPETITE." See the full ad after the jump.

Aw, it's so darn cute when it's a twentysomething straight white boy looking to pay-for-play on Craigslist that no one even mentions prostitution. The Georgia Tech student just wants a girl to teach him how to kiss better, so he might please some other college girl he's got a crush on, but not, like, get all hung up on him. A guy's got to leave his options open for the inevitable midlife crisis that'll send him right back to the one most obvious section of the site he overlooked in his initial search.

Some anonymous author is writing a book about how much the advertising industry sucks. Excuse me; it's about "where advertising is going." But he wants YOU, the insider, to tell him why the industry sucks. And he'll pay you $200 an hour to do it! Well, if your "half hour tops" of "the sewage that is in your head" makes the book, he'll give you 100 bucks, pro-rated. "Don't even edit it," he says. OR, you can send the same story to us, we'll pay you nothing, but the satisfaction of seeing it published here will be even more sensational! A good sideline for the creative soul considering quitting the wicked industry for good. The full Craigslist ad from the lazy muckraker, after the jump:

After last week's FBI sting conducted in concert with local law enforcement, in which 389 arrests netted 21 underage prostitutes, including four in Sacramento, Craigslist is again in the sex-panicked spotlight. In a familiar routine, law enforcement give stories of how they use the site's Erotic Services section to launch investigations, and CEO Jim Buckmaster gives good onscreen time in voicing the Craigslist company line that it is aiding in efforts to monitor teen prostitution:

This Craigslist-ad placer and "bestselling" author has been on the Tyra Banks Show, is willing to pay you $12 an hour (after you pay your own taxes), and just in case you didn't know what an assistant to a "well known author" does: "Did you see Sex in the City? Did you remember the role played by Jennifer Hudson where she's Carrie's assistant? Well, that's what I'm looking for." Oh, and don't reply if you are too good for "occasional light housework." (Even Louise from St. Louis organized Carrie Bradshaw's apartment!) Um, what else?

If you're looking for a couple of lovable pets, who happen to be gay, are you ever in luck! Those Salon writers who want gay sons will probably jump all over this so hurry up and save them from the hands of crazy people! Give these little gay furballs a home! [Craigslist]

On the sex worker message board mypinkbook, escorts are working their nerves over some messy moderation on the Craigslist help forums. Like when one woman's ad got flagged for being "a little hookerish." Pot, kettle, black patent pumps, we know. The escort, DameKelly, shares the now-deleted Craigslist moderator response:

A boxing match, to be specific. I'm in! [Craigslist]

Our secret girl admirer writes, "The perfect, shared Sunday for me would consist of..." among other things, fighting over the Sunday Times and fondling iPhones. After an art flick, "[w]e could catch up on blogs like Valleywag and TechCrunch." Ooh, dreamy! As the only one on the masthead with a scant few degrees of sexual separation from both blogs' founding editors, I have some words of — well — we have not even begun to overshare.

As much as we bemoan the dearth of good roles for women, minorities and Coreys, things have really never been worse for gerbils. But a change may be in the offing as early as this weekend, when one lucky hamster has the chance to break the fluorescent-plastic ceiling en route to the A-list:

In an attempt to be servicey (and atone for our sins), we posted the awesomest Craiglist apartment-seeking ad ever—it was a riot of nerdy kookiness. Musician Ed Shepp (our erstwhile advice columnist Tionna Smalls' buddy) was absolutely deluged with responses! To refresh your memory, he was looking for something cheap, "like seriously cheap, like under $700." (In case you think that's impossible, come to my place—I have achieved it.) Read on, because Ed has, too—"Thanks in great part to Gawker!" He's also included a computer rendering of what he hopes to turn his backyard into, complete with a menagerie of plastic lawn ornaments.

An email tipster claims to have received the following soap-opera-like chain of email messages in response to a "help wanted" ad on Craigslist. "The applicant attached her resume (which was a MESS) to this personal email chain — I can't imagine why!" she writes. "I have no idea how I got so lucky to have this gem dropped into my lap." Neither can we! Perhaps because it is an elaborate prank? Or maybe it's real, and originated from someone who doesn't realize that not everything on email has to be a reply or a forward — one CAN start new messages. In any case, what starts as comically awkward but otherwise unremarkable e-courtship takes an interesting, if sad, turn around message nine. Whether its origin, the thread does a good enough job simulating the experience of snooping into someone else's email inbox. Read it because you can't stop yourself, after the jump.

At this rate Craigslist might want to consider a subcategory for "Studio J.O. Break" or some like-titled catch-all for furtive worktime leisure pursuits; Casual Encounters can't possibly contain the epidemic of solicitations that began yesterday on the Sony lot and continues today with an even more ambitious transmission from Fox [NSFW]: