Check out this unearthed gem from 2006 of David Lee Roth's delightfully horrible attempt at going country. Hey, at least he has enthusiasm, right?

Break out the Marlboro Reds and warm beer, because Van Halen is back. Right now the original members are "in the studio recording an album with [David Lee] Roth" that should be out next year. Somewhere, Sammy Hagar is crying.

Sean Lennon turns 34 today. Sharon Osbourne is turning 57. Newly retired pro golfer Annika Sörenstam is 39. Former Senator Trent Lott is turning 68. Director Guillermo del Toro turns 45. Tony Shalhoub is 56. Jackson Browne is 61. John O'Hurley of Seinfeld and Dancing with the Stars is 55. Actor Brandon Routh is turning 30. C-SPAN founder Brian Lamb is 68. Singer-songwriter P.J. Harvey is 40. And Randy Spelling—son of Aaron and Candy and brother of Tori—turns 31 today. A few weekend birthdays are below.

Lift up your beer and make a toast: Mr. Mario Lopez is 35 today. Others celebrating on this Friday: Jets quarterback Brett Favre is 39. At the New York Times, Stefano Tonchi is 49 and Adam Nagourney is 54. Socialite Celerie Kemble turns 35. Artist Banks Violette turns 35. Cornell's Antonio Gotto Jr. is 73. Paper's Mickey Boardman is 42. And David Lee Roth is 54. Weekend birthdays after the jump.

We'll admit to having been completely stumped by what it was Britney Spears had dressed up as for Halloween, but our musical cousins at Idolator appear to have nailed it: Mid 80s-era Lee Roth. It's Diamond Dave, Bitch! [Idolator]

• We'd like to issue a formal apology to kiddie-chronicler David Amsden: When we saw the cover story for the latest New York mag, which examines the ambisexual teen "movement," we automatically assumed you were the author. But you weren't! We had you all wrong — we thought you automatically got covered that shit. Sorry to misjudge. [NYM]
• Dude, brah, we've got to get us some hot bitches for Sunday. Seriously, yo, I am NOT getting up from the leather sectional to fetch my own Budweiser. [Craigslist]
• Wait, isn't Hayden Christenson gay? [Egotastic]
• Former Page Sixer Ian Spiegelman joins the roman clef party by revealing his desire to shave former co-worker Paula Froelich's head. [Gatecrasher]
• The Oscars suck. Try something more democratic, like the Felixes. [The Felixes]
• Ashlee Simpson is David Lee Roth. Sorry, David. [CityRag]

• A sex scene involving Katie Holmes and Aaron Eckhart has been mysteriously removed from the film Thank You For Smoking, currently showing at Sundance. Never underestimate the editing powers of OT-VIIs. [Page Six]
• As Howard Stern's replacement, David Lee Roth has had a hard time winning over listeners — but not as hard of a time as he has getting his staff to tolerate him. [Lowdown]
• Shar Jones enacts revenge on Britney Spears, who stole her baby-daddy Kevin Federline, by sleeping with Spears' first husband, 48-hour Vegas mistake Jason Alexander. And that, children, is the story of syphilis. [Page Six]
• Billionaire Ron Perelman divorces his fourth wife — actress Ellen Barkin — and is rumored to be rekindling with his second wife, Claudia Cohen. Wives #1 and 3 wait patiently in the wings. [R&M]
• Cokey supermodel Kate Moss signs a $1.8 million deal for the rights to her autobiography. Sayeth the Braunstein: "It is a symbol of a true victim when you get the book rights."

Now that Howard Stern has abandoned 92.3 for the warm arms of Sirius (the new show starts January 9th — and what the hell is up with the Black Power logo accompanying his relaunch? Who are we kidding here?), "Diamond" David Lee Roth has taken over the morning slot on K-Rock. The station has been rebranded as Free FM, presumably in an effort to distance itself from its Stern-dominated history, but it's not going to do much good: both the papers and the listeners have been less than kind (granted, it's only day 2). Writes one New York Radio Message Board user: