Following Bam Margera's outrage over a Roger Ebert tweet about Jackass star Ryan Dunn's death ("friends don't let jackasses drink and drive") Ebert has taken to his blog.

If you've already been convicted of drunk driving a bunch of times, you might consider showing up to court sober? Sobriety impresses judges! Then again, you can also take the road chosen by Sandra Uher of Elgin, Illinois and try to impress the judge with your commitment to drunkenness.

Here's a video of Montana Congressman Alan Hale speaking out on the House floor this week against DUI laws. Hale believes they destroy "small businesses" (read: bars, like the one he owns). Is he actually supporting drunk driving?!

In New York City, regulators are searching for penalties that will discourage taxi drivers from refusing service to certain passengers. Why would a cabbie do such a thing? Let's turn to the comment section of NYPost.com to find out:

Nearly one in four people—23.7 percent—in Wisconsin admitted to driving while drinking alcohol, more than any other state in the union in the last year. Utah, unsurprisingly, came in last at 7.4 percent. Go celebrate, Utah! Soberly.

A Connecticut man was so drunk the other night that he crashed his truck into someone's house. It was his fourth time being busted for drunk driving. He also wore a t-shirt that says, "I have a drinking problem..."

Have you ever wanted to haul ass down the West Side Highway after a long night of awesome Meatpacking clubbing? Good news! The nearby NYPD Highway Patrol unit is being moved to the Bronx to save money. Party time. [NYP]

Before the Manzo/Giudice crew left for Italy, the Housewives confronted Joe's alleged drunken driving arrest. On top of the disturbing pictures from the crash, Danielle's reaction to the situation was not necessarily one of "love and light".

Paul Nigel Sneddon of Palmerston North, New Zealand, flipped his car. Police found him drinking a beer, his BAC already three times the legal limit. Said his lawyer, "he had nothing else to... so he had another beer." [Reuters]

Bestselling artist/crook Thomas Kinkade was arrested on suspicion of a DUI in California. According to police, he was "very nice," for a guy whose life's work represents the vicious murder of art at the hands of religious capitalism. [Modesto Bee]

Two days after police responded to a "domestic incident," Mary F. Kennedy, wife of Robert F. Kennedy, Jr, was arrested for drunk driving outside of a school. She failed two sobriety tests and registered a blood alcohol level of 0.11%.

They grow up so fast! The artist formerly known as Lil' Bow Wow—now just Bow Wow—live-tweeted his wild New Year's partying, including driving his "lambo" while "so fucked up" before handing the wheel over to Chris Brown.

Charlene Lugar, the wife of staid Indiana Sen. Dick Lugar, was charged with DWI in McLean, Va., last night after driving into a parked car. Now we know who does all the partying (or vodka-in-the-coffee-thermos drinking) in the Lugar family.

Bad enough the lady is drinking and driving with only one hand because she's holding a (hallucinated?) dragon in the other hand. Also, her eyes are closed. [Copyranter. Click to enlarge.]

How many of you are "binge drinkers," meaning you had five drinks in a night once last month? (All you drunks raise your hands). Now, how many of you drove after getting wasted? (Pause). Liars! Science knows.

Last October, Maureen White, the former finance chair for the Democratic National Committee and wife of Steve Rattner, was arrested for drunk driving. According to the police report, White was pulled over in her Mercedes at the Throgs Neck Bridge and failed a field sobriety test, registering a blood-alcohol level that was twice the legal limit. (She subsequently pleaded guilty to the charges, paid a fine, and had her driver's license suspended for 90 days.) That the Democratic fundraiser and wife of one of the city's most prominent financiers had been arrested was certainly news, and the Daily News covered the arrest a day later in an article titled "Democratic Money Queen in Booze Bust." But the paper pulled the article down soon after—it was originally located here—and now we know why. A source inside the News tells us the order came from "the very top," namely Daily News publisher Mort Zuckerman.

Here's a photo that is circulating like crazy around various websites, Tumblr blogs, etc. It's so incredible that we initially assumed it had to be a fake. Though a simple Googling reveals that the photo is, unfortunately, real. A drunk driver in Mexico fell asleep at the wheel and plowed into several bicyclists who were competing in a road race.

Mothers Against Drunk Driving is (are?) asking video game rating board ESRB to change Grand Theft Auto IV's rating from Mature to Adults Only because the game lets players drink and then drive. Complaints still to come from Mothers Against Banging Hookers In The Park, Mothers Against Working For Gangsters As An Assassin, and Mothers Against Driving Around Doing Stunts Involving Dozens Of Deaths. [Gamespot]

18-year-old Barron Hilton has yet to really capture the world's imagination the way his older sisters Paris and Nicky have, his wealthy parents perhaps waiting until he turns 21 before gifting him with his very own orange-faced pet flack to encourage such profile-building. And while some suspected the Hilton family's dominant Shameless Famewhoring Gene may have skipped him entirely, the young heir may just have that Hilton magic after all, having been picked up this morning in Malibu for a DUI:

Lindsay Lohan was arrested in Santa Monica at 2:15 a.m. Pacific time today, and booked at 4:23 a.m. by the Santa Monica police department for drunken driving. Her second arrest for a DUI is a felony charge, and her bail was set at $25,000. Her previous DUI arrest was by the Beverly Hills Police Department, after a Memorial Day car crash; she was released on bail last week. Lohan turned 21 this month and is not really expected to see 22.