An Idaho woman faces up to six months in jail after allegedly beating a hunter's falcon to death with a beaded scarf, apparently a failed attempt to rescue a duck it was attacking, the Associated Press reports.

It is absolutely not surprising that this edit of the intro to Disney's DuckTales, starring real ducks, exists. It's just surprising that it took so long—we've passed the peak of '90s pop culture nostalgia by now, right?—and that so much effort went into redoing it shot-for-shot when a much lazier video could have filled the same internet-hole.

Army veteran Darin Welker, 36, has been raising 14 ducks as a form of therapy after sustaining a back injury in Iraq in 2005. Welker started keeping the ducks in the yard of his West Lafayette, Ohio home since March of this year, and has since received citations from town officials, who are demanding he get rid of the ducks. West Lafayette officials are citing a law adopted in 2010 that expressly forbids the keeping of "live poultry or fowl of any kind" (among many other animals).

A giant, 59-foot rubber duck made by Dutch artist Florentijn Hofman, was happily floating on the Nanming River in China's Guizhou Province, when it went missing on Wednesday night after days of heavy rain, local media reports say. The duck weighs 1 ton.

A Canadian woman who parked her car in the left lane of a highway to help ducks by the side of the road has been charged with two counts of criminal negligence and dangerous driving causing death after a motorist crashed into her car, resulting in the death of the driver and his 16-year-old daughter.

I don't know whether to be delighted or mortified at the above video, which shows a truly enormous group of ducks, pouring down a roadway like a flood, threatening to engulf anything or anyone foolish enough to dip their toes into the water.

Saturday night, a woman woke in the middle of the night to loud banging sounds coming from the first floor of her North Reading, Massachusetts home. Fearing a burglar, the woman called police, who arrived and discovered the culprit—a female wood duck—after searching the house.

Waddle over, Birdemic — there's an even lower rent Birds homage in town.

Security screeners at a court in Honolulu were having a regular, run-of-the-mill day earlier this week when they noticed something unusual as they X-rayed a man's bag – an object appeared to be moving inside. When the guards asked the man, Michael Hubbard, to open his bag, he initially refused. The screeners insisted.

Patricia Brennan, tthe scientist who conducted the study on duck penises that ruffled the conservative media's feathers earlier this week, has finally come forward to tell everyone to stop freaking out about her scientific research. Duck dicks are important, she says, and Fox News just doesn't "get" science. She goes on to say some science-y things about ducks and their penises and then shares with us the real reason for her research: DUCK PENISES ARE FUCKING NUTS.

Praise be the gods, our long national nightmare of peace and quiet is over. After firing Gilbert Gottfried from his job voicing Aflac's screaming spokes-duck, the insurance company has completed its national search for a less offensive replacement. The winner is a sales manager from Hugo, Minnesota (population: 13,000) named Daniel McKeague. Congratulations, Daniel. We can't wait to scramble for the mute button every time your bone-chilling squawk comes on TV.

These little ducklings have just one step to go before they can join the rest of their adorable little duck family. Can they do it? Watch and find out.

Some ducklings were out for a stroll with their mother when they were hit by some very strong winds. Watch as the poor little guys get flipped upside down (even the mother duck tumbles) - thankfully, no one was hurt.

Q: What do a dog and a duckling have in common? A: Each other. Watch these friends for life hanging round the house.

In the middle of a speech today on, uh, Gay Rights maybe, President Obama was interrupted by a duck. It was someone's ringtone, apparently.