This sketch starring Aidy Bryant was cut from SNL for time, but it should not have been, because it's a fantastic reminder that no one should ever tweet.

"I don't know what I'm saying. My face is melting off. I didn't even answer anything, I just said a bunch of words," admitted Emma Stone on Monday night, sitting on a panel with three of her Birdman co-stars after a screening of their film, as part of the 92nd St. Y's Reel Pieces with Annette Insdorf series. Those words concluded more than a minute of rambling from Stone in response to an audience member's question about the interplay of craft, social media, and fame that Alejandro González Iñárritu's new movie about acting touches on.

Edward Norton was on The View today when Whoopi Goldberg asked him if there was any truth to the rumor that he might play the Riddler in an upcoming Batman movie. He responds, "Are you reading IMDb? Don't read IMDb."

Here's a trailer for Stone, a thriller starring Robert De Niro and Edward Norton, reunited some nine years after they thrilled in The Score. This looks like a slightly more sedate movie, with a lot of sitting and yelling.

But now we've got a marijuana rumor. Emma Watson gets an on-campus boyfriend. Liz Hurley and Hugh Grant reunite to trade tips for graceful aging. Courtney Love admits to physically harming her daughter. Sunday gossip turns back the clock.

In Leaves of Grass Edward Norton plays twins, one of whom deals pot. At last night's snack-accompanied SxSW screening, Edward's mellow went up in smoke when he thought he received a bill for his munchies. A witness writes in.

Did you know an American won this year's NYC Marathon? Who gives a shit! Celebrities ran. How did Edward Norton, Alanis Morissette, Anthony "Goose" Edwards, Mario Batali's Partner-In-Crime, model Tara Costa, and others do? And what other wackiness transpired? Updated!

[Submit your own Gawker Stalker sightings to stalker@gawker.com] May 3 @ 11:15pm Saw Edward Norton with a group of people and a young lady on his arm.

Two years ago, after Ed Norton was chivalrous to a New York waitress, we wondered if his career was on the ropes because "Quality celebrities would never be nice to you." Well, the film star must have let the financial success of the Incredible Hulk go to his head, because now he can't buy groceries without pissing off Hollywood insiders with his insolence. Witness the attached Missed Connections ad on Craigslist, already pulled, which firmly establishes that Norton does not take kindly to being complimented while buying frozen shrimp. (Frozen shrimp? Those are tricky waters for a self-professed environmentalist!) Consider yourself warned the next time you see Norton at the Spotted Pig or whatever! (Click the thumbnail to view the original post.)

For some reason, The Incredible Hulk star Edward Norton has apparently been telling fans that he wrote the screenplay for the superhero flick. This doesn't sit well at all with screenwriter Zak Penn, considering that he enjoys sole writing credit and says he'd been working on the story for more than a decade. Penn showed up at San Diego's Comic-Con 2008 yesterday and aired his thoughts to an appreciative audience of nerds.

Two percent doesn't sound like much of a quantity on its face, but it's apparently more than enough room for studio execs to rejoice after recent box-office scans reveal this year's grosses are slightly up from those of Summer 2007. Observers attribute part of the bump to "better-than-expected" openings for films like Kung-Fu Panda, Sex and the City, The Happening and The Incredible Hulk, with the latter film's $55 million opening rounding out Marvel Studios' blockbuster tandem with Iron Man.

Welcome back to Defamer Attractions, your guide to the latest surges and scourges among this weekend's new movies. After a fairly predictable go of things last week, we face a pair of high-profile releases that couldn't be further apart in their critical and commercial futures, a nifty and thoroughly unnerving art-house project (hint: wheelchair sex) and a surplus of worthwhile DVD debuts for the shut-ins among us. As always, our opinions are our own and, of course, exceedingly tasteful and accurate. We are always looking out for you!

· Thanks to you, The Moment of Truth, no one will ever commit bigoted acts of fatism ever again! You're not the most evil TV show in history—you're bringing humankind closer together! [TMOT]
· Edward Norton prefers to let The Incredible Hulk do the junket-blabbing for itself. So tell us, Incredible Hulk—how are you similar/different to your big screen alter ego? "ARAHRRHHHHGHH SMAAAAAAAASH GRAAAAAAAAH!!!!" Really? That's hilarious! [NY Daily News]
· Something about conspiracy-junkie Mary Hart's unwillingness to break ranks with her ET underlings in the wake of ChosenTwoGate really gives us a whole new appreciation for the preternaturally perky showbiz news icon. [LAT]
· Kaufman Astoria Studios runs full steam ahead with their plan to obliterate Hollywood and establish Queens as the entertainment capital of the world. [nytimes.com]
· Sumner Redstone is a happily married mummified-Viacom-overlord, he'll have you know, regardless of who you spotted him catching up with at Ruth's Chris Steak House. [NY Post]

Green skin, black lungs: That's what smoking-in-film watchdog group the American Medical Association Alliance is accusing Universal of showcasing in The Incredible Hulk, and thereby encouraging its teen audiences of picking up the deadly habit in order to emulate the cool on-screen persona of William Hurt's stogie-loving army general. From their press release:

While it's tracking nicely and all set to smash Friday the 13th's other green menace—The Happening—into M. Night Smithereens, Universal is still not taking any chances on getting The Incredible Hulk word out. Besides the new one-sheet featuring a Herb Rittsian, rear-view shot of the verdant one filling out a pair of Levis HulkFit™ jeans (one must never underestimate the power of the all-mighty gay dollar!), a new TV spot puts what was supposed to be a surprise cameo—Robert Downey Jr.'s Tony Starke, aka Iron Man, aka the new Marvel-Universal Quality Assurance Seal of Approval mascot—at the very top, there to ease the concerns of a traumatized fanboy nation who still wake up in cold nightsweats screaming, "ANG LEE'S TAKE ON THE MATERIAL WAS ENTIRELY TOO CLINICAL AND ROBBED OF ALL HULK-SMASH PASSION!" The two may eventually go on to fight alongside one another in The Avengers movie, something hinted at by Iron Man's own super-secret-surprise cameo—which revealed itself only to moviegoers who sat through the credits. If you missed it, it's after the jump:

Defamer HQ opens for business this morning with an apology to newly non-difficult Edward Norton, whose squabbles with Marvel and Universal over The Incredible Hulk appear to have been blown out of proportion by a naturally overzealous press. Via Entertainment Weekly, Norton himself went public for the first time this week to shout "Piffle!" at the accounts of acrimony dug up by Nikki Finke and The New York Times (and dutifully passed on by us); lest we risk decontextualization of any of his precious 257 words, we now pass along his full statement and more of our own profuse contrition after the jump:

Try as it might, Universal is facing another orgy of resistance to its big-screen efforts on behalf of the Incredible Hulk comic franchise. This time around, five years after Ang Lee's expensive, cheesy The Hulk flatlined into muscly green oblivion, The Incredible Hulk has studio flacks spinning, onlookers shrugging and temperamental star Edward Norton naturally pouting over the whole drama. Reports NY Timesman Brooks Barnes:

In addition, Norton demanded to have a hand in the preparation of his meal at the restaurant as well as seating the rest of the patrons and busing the tables. Norton also had some notes that he'd like to discuss with the chef regarding the menu and how to improve it.

And in the debate over which cartoonish, nearly-identical-looking summer blockbuster Hulk is cooler, we'll have to go with the one that looks less like the color of Green Giant frozen peas, and more like the color of Green Giant canned peas. [incrediblehulk.marvel.com]

The just-released trailer for The Incredible Hulk shows few signs of the shocking truth—splashed across the pages of The Finkeian Tattler—about the power-play going on behind the scenes. (For the uninitiated: Ed Norton has been offering up his creative point of view, which differs slightly from that of the 1200 other cooks required to make a superhero blockbuster. We know! Entirely shocking!) Based on these two-minutes of footage, it seems the touchy-feely beast of Ang Lee's version, weighed down with boring daddy-issues and roaming the streets of San Francisco like an HGH-abusing Gumby, has been replaced with something a little more in line with what Hulk fanatics expect from their gamma-ray-enhanced avocado-beasts. GRAGGGHHHHAAAAAAAAA!!!!!