Today, 5/23
1. Enjoy Fleet Week festivities.
2. See the opening of the Skateboard Design Exhibition at Dactyl.
3. Rollerskate to live chick rock at the Rock 'n Rollerskating Party.

1. See a screening and filmmaker discussion of the film Comedian at the JCC.
2. Hear Alix Strauss read from her debut novel, The Joy of Funerals, at the Bowery Ballroom.

1. Hear historian Michael Eric Dyson lecture on the sin of Pride at the NY Public Library.
2. Go to the Bollywood Disco First Anniversary Party
3. See Ian McCulloch at the Bowery Ballroom.

1. See the held-over-by-popular-demand documentary Spellbound at Film Forum.
2. Go to the Tuesday night party at Serena, in the Chelsea Hotel.
3. Catch The Cramps at Irving Plaza.

1. See Johnny Marr at Irving Plaza.
2. Hear poetry by Mark Wunderlich, Joanna Goodman, and Amy Eisner at Reading Between A and B
3. Catch the new Blue Man Group show at Hammerstein Ballroom.

Friday:
1. Brave the long lines for The Matrix Reloaded
2. See Richard Greenberg's Take Me Out at the Walter Kerr Theatre.
3. Hear Marjane Satrapi read from her comic strip memoir of growing up in Iran.

1. View Andy Warhol's screen tests at the MoMA Queens.
2. Catch live dance band Jojo Mayer's Prohibited Beatz at Centro-Fly.
3. Hear friends and fans of the late Frank O'Hara read from his poems at the New School.

Now that the weather's starting to go from Really Fucking Cold to Not That Terribly Bad, Manhattan User Guide offers a list of recommended venues for outdoor dining. Making the list: Jean-Georges, Barbetta, the Half King, D.O.C., Django, Sosa Borella, and Paradou.
Where to take them al-fresco [MUG]

1. Catch indie rock icon Stephen Malkmus at Irving Plaza.
2. Photographer Stanley Greenberg talks about his new book, Water Works: A Journey Through New York's Hidden Water System at the Melville Gallery.
3. View the works of Pierre et Gilles (*cough* spotted at Beige last night, "table by the terrace, surrounded by various freaks and prettyboys" *cough*) at the Robert Miller Gallery.

1. Catch comedienne Sarah Silverman at the Zipper.
2. Hear Arundhati Roy and Howard Zinn discuss U.S. foreign policy at Riverside Church.
3. Funk musician Jef Lee Johnson plays at the Knitting Factory.

1. Indie new-wavers The Faint play Irving Plaza.
2. Chang and Eng author Darin Strauss is reading at Arlene Grocery.
3. Hear Lawrence Lessig speak at Cooper Union about Internet law and creativity.

James Frey, who has been the subject of one-too-many Gawker posts as of late, is reading tonight at the Astor Place Barnes and Noble at 7:30 PM. Gawker on James Frey:
· James Frey: random facts
· James Frey and Neal Pollack
· More James Frey
· James Frey
· James Frey and Dave Eggers
· James Frey

Or no signs, at least. The Post reviews a few of New York's "hidden" bars and lounges, including Milk & Honey, Happy Ending, Angel's Share, and the No Malice Palace.
We know a dark, secluded place [Post]

1. Hear Pete Hamill read from his latest novel, Forever, at the Union Square Barnes & Noble or Tolstoy's great-grandniece, Tatyana Tolstaya, read from her novel, The Slynx, at the Housing Works Used Book Cafe.
2. Catch Pedro Almodóvar's Law of Desire at the Walter Reade theater.
3. View Louis Stettner's shots of New York, Paris, and Argentina at the Bonni Benrubi Gallery.