Google chairman Eric Schmidt arrived in Pyongyang today for the start of a controversial trip to North Korea on a "private humanitarian mission" with former New Mexico governor Bill Richardson. The State Department isn't too keen on the visit, coming so soon after North Korea pissed off the world by launching a satellite into orbit. But Eric Schmidt does what he wants, because he is from The Internet, and The Internet heeds no mortal law.

Eric Schmidt has either gone through a sudden midlife transformation or is a hopelessly tangled web of contradictions. Either way, the Google chairman and longtime CEO wants to make one thing clear: He is still devoted to his wife, despite all the, you know, extramarital girlfriends.

It's been almost one year since Eric Schmidt stepped down as CEO of Google, and sometimes it seems like he's experienced a midlife identity crisis. Schmidt drives a Ferrari, will reportedly divorce his wife, and now he's calling on programmers, like those at Google, to speak out against any evil practices their bosses ask them to perform.

You never call, you never write, and Google has had it: If you would like entry into the spiffy new Google search results, and you are a social network, Google would like you to send the company a letter first.

Before Radiohead took the reins on tonight's Report, Stephen Colbert made sure to get in a few words about just how smitten he is with Google for its recent one-two punch of anarchy—first, by denying Rick Santorum's request to wipe his Santorum from its results page, and then by sending feisty chairman Eric Schmidt into a Senate panel investigating allegations the company practiced search discrimination against certain competitors.

Has Apple's war on Google soared to 30,000 feet? Marcy Simon, erstwhile mistress of Google chairman Eric Schmidt, has taken to Twitter to report her "abuse" at the hands of a United flight attendant.

People have been complaining that, by requiring real names, Google Plus trades your privacy for Google's bottom line. So Google's chairman just assured a crowd in Scotland that, in actuality, the social network trades your privacy for some frickin' awesome enhancements to Google's bottom line.

Kim Kardashian's wedding, complete with Justin Bieber and dresses and a cake priced at $20,000+, will be a thoroughly Hollywood affair. But it wouldn't have been possible without Silicon Valley's indulgence.

GQ released a list of the "15 worst dressed men in tech," which is a bit like shooting fish in a barrel; engineers are hardly known as fashion plates. Indeed, the magazine was so overwhelmed with badly dressed techies it left a few people off its list.

Google's chairman Eric Schmidt has a new girlfriend, who's just like all his other girlfriends. Also in today's Valleywag roundup: Wikipedia's co-founder is burning through his money fast and Twitter will now take bribes for access to the top of your stream.

Eric Schmidt is sorry he let Facebook walk away with the entire social networking market. The Google chairman and CEO said he knew about the threat several years ago, but didn't address it. Distracted, much?

Google CEO Eric Schmidt once famously proclaimed that today's kids might all need to change their names to escape their embarrassing Internet trail. What about tech CEOs? A new book reveals Schmidt tried, and failed, to scrub his own Google results.

Google co-founder Larry Page is set to take over as CEO of Google when Eric Schmidt steps down on April 4th. He's already started instituting some changes to streamline bureaucracy in an attempt to help the massive company return to its startup roots. And according to the Wall Street Journal, Page doesn't want Googlers distracted during meetings:

Eric Schmidt has already expressed interest in a book deal and a TV show. But is politics where he's actually headed after his stint at Google is up in April? Rumor has it Obama is "close to naming" Google CEO Eric Schmidt as Secretary of Commerce. This would be an OK idea as long as Schmidt never opens his mouth or offers his weird opinion on anything. Maybe he'll know how to help Obama boost productivity by spying on idle workers in Google Street View.

Steve Jobs, rumored to be dying of cancer, was healthy enough to sit beside Obama at a dinner for tech moguls in San Francisco last night. Also in attendance: Mark Zuckerberg, who was pried out of his hoodie for the occasion, Google CEO Eric Schmidt, Yahoo! chief Carol Bartz and Twitter CEO Dick Costolo.

Apparently not content with his original musings on the popular uprising in Egypt (" The entire Mediterranean is on fire.") Fox News host Glenn Beck has expanded the scope of his theories to include the sinister engineers at Google, about whom he says:

After 10 years in the position, Google CEO Eric Schmidt is poised to step down and transfer day-to-day responsibilities to co-founder Larry Page. Schmidt, known for his puzzling utterances, also enjoys the word "literally." A lot. A whole, whole lot.

Having failed to sell his "disaster" of a TV show, Eric Schmidt is now shopping a book proposal. Because, honestly, what else is Google's CEO going to do? Oversee the biggest, most profitable and indispensable site on the internet? Please.

Google's soon-to-be-ex CEO reportedly filmed a pilot for CNN as part of a year-long effort to find a TV job. The only problem: It was really, really bad.

Technology seemed especially relevant in 2010, what with The Social Network's blockbuster receipts and mass mania for Apple's iPad and iPhone 4. The newfound attention helped turned some techies into genuine stars — while lending others real worldwide infamy.