"Fratire" practitioner and pussy-pulling machine Tucker Max is best known for a handful of stories about himself on his blog that all-upon close inspection-involve getting drunk and chasing girls and are really not that interesting. But as an author with a well-developed voice, he sometimes ventures further afield, into stories about himself doing slightly different mundane things. But Tucker's never been able to understand the difference between being a charming asshole and being an actual asshole, and he is the latter, despite what he may think deep down. That's why he writes things like this long three-year-old message board posting about meeting an FBI agent whose tales of killing Mexicans land him in the Awesome Guy Hall of Fame! Tucker seems to have some latent fear of Mexicans, mane. Enjoy: The scene: Tucker is sitting next to an FBI agent on a plane, swapping stories:

The hits keep on coming in the doomed romance between Anne Hathaway and Raffaello Follieri, from the latter of whose New York penthouse the feds have purged everything from abandoned dogs to Hathaway's diaries and now, if rumors are true, a collection of Hathaway soft-core commissioned by Follieri himself. It's nothing we haven't seen before in Brokeback Mountain or Havoc, presumably, but God's CFO wants what God's CFO wants. Tastefully smutty details after the jump.

The Fed love a good porn investigation. Allegedly, John Gray, CEO of the strip-club-industrial complex Spearmint Rhino, has been illegally taking control of domains owned by his former business partner, Michael Ninn, best known for the kind of arty, high-gloss hardcore films that almost take themselves too seriously to be porn. The FBI is rumored to be investigating. On the one hand, it's good that the naked-lady biz has its corporate-level disputes treated fairlly by the cops. On the less-lubed hand? The tipster alerting us to this case offers a better remedy: Perhaps Mr. Gray could focus on his actual naked-lady biz and drop the overpriced drinks and cover charges. (Photo via AVN)

With the help of the Electronic Frontier Foundation and the American Civil Liberties Union, Internet Archive founder Brewster Kahle successfully challenged an FBI request to secretly hand over information about the site's users. The FBI had sent Kahle a "national security letter" which requested personal information about a particular user and put Kahle under a gag order. Approximately 200,000 of the secret requests, which need no judicial approval, were issued between 2003 and 2006 after the NSL program was expanded by the Patriot Act. Kahle's case is one of only three the ACLU is aware of where NSL requests were successfully overturned in court. (Photo by David Silver)

Head honcho of the federales, Robert Mueller, let his fantasies run wild in hearings held by the House of Representatives' Judiciary Committee on Wednesday:

In the ever-evolving canon of celebrity sex tapes, neither a pseudo-Lindsay Lohan nor a canny Kristin Davis nor anyone since Pamela and Tommy likely have anything on Marilyn Monroe, whom the Post reports today was featured on a newly unearthed stag reel performing oral sex. Or maybe it's Marilyn Monroe. We're not so sure ourselves.

The 2007 Internet Crime Complaint Report from the FBI and National White Collar Crime Center says that reported fraud online reached a new high of $240 million. In other words, Nigerian scammers make more money than Mahalo. [ICCC]

Anyone else hearing that FBI showed up to the McGraw-Hill building in Manhattan looking for Judith Regan? The Feds thought the controversial publishing impresario would be at the Sirius office, in the 6th Avenue skyscraper, for her Wednesday appearance on the satellite radio network, according to a tipster. But the show is pre-taped on Tuesday, so she wasn't there. The FBI agents told the Sirius receptionist they were sending a team to Regan's house as well. What on earth would they be looking for?

The FBI has made a deal with Clear Channel to put "most wanted" bulletins and "hot pursuit" alerts on digital billboards around the country. Predictable: The SiliconView digital billboard on the 101 was just the beginning. The future of outdoor advertising is digital billboards which can display different ads depending on time of day or current traffic conditions, for example. So it makes sense that public security would be just the latest use for these annoying monstrosities. A trial of the technology in Philadelphia led to the capture of three criminals, so the project is being expanded to 150 billboards in 20 cities across the U.S. But the real question is when Google will start brokering the ad space. (Photo by AP/Jim Mone)

The FBI dealt a stunning blow to the power of magic late Wednesday night with a bizarre raid of illusionist David Copperfield's Las Vegas house, presumably performed in a frenetic, jump cut-heavy style as a classic rock song played. They made off with $2 million in cash, a hard drive, and his camera's memory stick, as related by E! and a detached Robert DeNiro voiceover. The FBI refuses to say what it's all about, except that it involves "an on-going investigation" that began in Washington (State!). Then the FBI stopped by the MGM-Grand, where Copperfield is scheduled to be in residence for two weeks in November. And Joe Pesci suffered some sort of violent death. Copperfield's vast collection of "perception-deceiving devices" was untouched, thankfully. But yeah, what the hell is this about? Are the feds finally busting up the magic racket? Can they indict Criss Angel? Please? [E! via Yahoo!]

Local hacker "Memehacker" IMed in with a scoop on Alan Ralsky, the famed "Spam King" covered by the Observer and the Detroit News. Here's the breaking story: