The political action committee Americans Against Insecure Billionaires with Tiny Hands ran its first television spot Wednesday night, encouraging MSNBC viewers in the Washington metropolitan area to sign a petition demanding Donald Trump release his official hand measurements.

It is not, as a rule, charitable to poke fun at another person’s physical shortcomings. However, when that person is both a public figure and a politician who actively and continually draws on the tenets of racism, misogyny and homophobia as a campaign platform, certain concessions can be made.

This morning, Rob Thomas accidentally removed a chunk of his left hand's middle finger while preparing breakfast. Jose Canseco accidentally removed a chunk of same with a handgun in October, and shortly after Thomas' mishap, the legendary ballplayer took to Twitter to commiserate.

Here are the simple facts: 14 year-old Ryan Hart of Jackson, Michigan was finishing up his Arby's roast beef sandwich last week when he bit into an non-traditional ingredient—"The fleshy, severed pad of an unfortunate employee's finger." It had been sliced off in a meat slicer. These things happen.

One of the great mysteries of humankind—Why do my fingers get all wrinkly during baths?—has maybe-possibly been solved. Says science: "Much like the tread on a tire, [raisin fingers] improve traction." Sure, that sounds reasonable. Apparently the nervous system controls the wrinkle response, and it has nothing to do with bloating or water absorption. [Well, BrainBehavior&Evolution, Image via Afronova/Shutterstock]

If your eyeball pops out, don't shove it back in, says CNN's popular new article "What to Do When Body Parts Fall Off." It's the Things Fall Apart of health articles. Let's enhance it with a DO and DON'T guide.

Fancy strollermaker Maclaren just issued its stroller recall this week, but it's known its products could chop off your baby's fingers for at least five years now. Why does Maclaren want Park Slope's streets littered with tiny digits? [NYP]

Men with unusually long ring fingers are more likely to be either a successful stock trader, or gay. So what does that tell us about the government's wise men patching up the economy?