In a major victory for the Suffolk Police Department, officer Robert Howard caught a woman driving illegally in the HOV lane with a sultry female dummy riding shotgun. Was Wendy Williams on Long Island yesterday?

When Fox and Friends welcomed Jim Belushi and Bruce Jenner onto today's program, they opened the bit with a faux-six degrees of separation chart that may have stretched a few facts. Jenner notices, stating "that's just how news works here."

The doll, that is! Yes, the Scott Brown Action Figure exists and comes in three varieties: the Executive, the Presidential, and the Cosmopolitan. It sure seems to make Gretchen a little uncomfortable.

Today at Gawker.TV, How I Met Your Mother may have poked fun at Julie Chen, another day at Fox and Friends, Stephen Colbert mocks NBC, the antics of a recently-arrested Teen Mom mother, and Brendan Fraser addresses his questionable clap.

Someone must be playing a joke on the Fox and Friends anchors: dead air time, cuts to videos that don't exist, and a text overlay saying "The People's Seat Senate Shocker" at the same time Gretchen mentions a "major blow."

Oh Fox & Friends, how I've missed you. Today our beloved murmuring crayfish were discussing Sarah Palin's big Fox News debut and Gretchen, whoo-boy-howdy!, sure was impressed with her. She got such tough questions! Like: "Is Nancy Pelosi a kook?"

Brian Kilmeade—one-third of the legendary Fox and Friends triumverate—had quite the year. A year full of blunders, ignorance, terrible jokes, worse improvisation, and awkward double entendres. Here are his best moments.

Brent Bozell—of the ultra-lame Parents Television Council and conservative Media Research Center—was on Fox & Friends this morning to announce MRC's picks for "the year's worst reporting." His indictment of ABC's Terry Moran should be a last-minute addition.

24-hour news networks fill their days with non-stop rambling. But sometimes it would be nice if they could just calm down for one second. For those in need of a break, here's a full minute of awkward tv silences.

Celebrating Yankee hero Derek Jeter's record-breaking hit last Friday in the family suite: His parents, sister, girlfriend, and...Fox & Friends blondebot Gretchen Carlson. She's married to Jeter's agent. God. Lou Gehrig is crying, from heaven. [Click to enlarge. Thanks, W!]

The nice white people at Fox & Friends just hate "potty mouth politics," so they asked Michelle Malkin to come on and talk about how we should all just disagree with dignity and civility.

There is so little "real news," in August. So you can create your own conspiratorial mythology, like Glenn Beck, or you can just turn literally everything you say into a "that's what she said" joke, like everyone else on TV.

Oh Fox & Friends. The whimpering ferrets had Show-and-Tell today, and somebody (Gretchywetchy, was it you?) brought in their crazy uncle Glenn Beck. He wanted to warn the kids of one thing: Communism is coming. And it will destroy us.

Oh, Gretchywetchy. The Fox & Friends hostess earned some points yesterday, but now she's lost them all again. The bewigged legumes were discussing the $18 million Recovery.gov website today and Gretchen just didn't understand it. It's a double entendre, right??

To stave off dementia! Yes, today the befuddled screech owls on Fox & Friends were discussing a study that states that those that stay married fend off Alzheimer's and dementia better than lonely divorcees. Brian Kilmeade took issue with this.

Fox & Friends-apalooza continues. Today the billy goats were chewing their grass and talking about that Bruno movie and the high school controversy. Gretchen was actually cool about it, Doocy was a jerk, and Bri-Bri just thinks he smells bad.

Oh what did the cutest lil' morning newscasters get up to today? Well, we have everyone being awkward with celebrated skincare spokeslady, Vanessa L. Williams. She Botoxes!

So it's been a weird day. Things changing everywhere! But at least some things are constant: the gurgling sea cucumbers at Fox & Friends will never get it. Today's confusion? The case of the cardboard bear. Everyone was perplexed.

Oh, phew! The hole-in-the-head gang at Fox & Friends finally had a lucid and credible debate about an important topic. Abortion? No. Iran? Nah. The earth-shattering divorce of Jon & Kate Gosselin? Why yes, of course.

In our continuing series of portraits depicting the mental athletes at Fox & Friends trying to wrap their minds around things, we have today the fun-times gang trying to figure out those pesky Uighurs. Are they terrorists? No one knows.