Congratulations to 2015 French-language Scrabble champion Nigel Richards, whose qualifications include: five U.S. national titles, three world championships, ability to memorize a large chunk of a French dictionary, and beard. His qualifications do not include: being French, speaking French.

Alain Resnais, who was known for his prominence in the French New Wave movement in the 60s, and for an extensive 50-film career, has died at 91. He was surrounded by his family in Paris.

Though their grape smashing continues to hold authority across the globe, French wine-makers once had to be taught how to grow, stomp, swill their grapes. Molecular analysis of ancient wine pots and presses in the south of France indicates that the Italians instructed the French on the best methods to turn a delicious snack food into a refined grape beverage.

The British (and much of the EU) are freaking out over this horse meat scandal, which has only grown in intensity since it was revealed that instead of just trace amounts of equine meat in frozen food manufacturer Findus' Lasagna products, it was, er, pretty much all horse.

Newt Gingrich is running yet another attack ad on Mitt Romney in South Carolina, this time simply throwing spaghetti at the wall: He's donated to Democrats, voted for a Democrat once, loves abortion, yadda yadda yadda. Also, Mitt Romney is John Kerry, in that they are both from Massachusetts, where the official language is French. Watch Mitt Romney speak French in 2002, like a fool.

Remember Susan Burns, the woman "from the American CIA" who in April tried to beat up a Gauguin hung at the National Gallery of Art? Well, she got back inside the gallery somehow, and this time allegedly went nuts on a Matisse.

French politician Aurelie Filippetti reportedly told police that she never visited supposed sex-binger Dominique Strauss-Kahn at his Parisian apartment because people warned her that the ex-IMF chief maybe attacked women there. Did she actually call DSK's place a "sex den," though?

Accused sex criminal and probable bad-tipper Dominique Strauss-Kahn sits behind bars, repeatedly denied bail out of fears he'll jump a charter flight to the nearest extradition-exempt Club Med locale. Meanwhile, his countrymen have been rallying behind the former IMF head.

Franck Lebrun was arrested following a flight from NYC to Nice after he was caught smoking and shoved a flight attendant. He then yelled, "I'm French, fuck you." Was he also wearing a beret and eating a baguette?

Rihanna's new neck tattoo says "rebelle fleur," the French words for "rebellious" and "flower." Unfortunately, adjectives usually follow the noun in French, so "rebelle fleur" is actually just gibberish. Click to enlarge.

American Apparel CEO Dov Charney's scofflaw nature is not a recent development. He was busted for illegally selling t-shirts in Montreal (the business that would eventually become AA) way back in 1987. The shocking Canadian court document proof, below!

It's one thing to get racked in the berries flying down a hill at 70 MPH, it's quite another for the announcer to add insult to injury with some hilarious commentary. Ohhh monsieuuuuuuur!

Sure Google can help you do a lot of things, but did you also know it could help you find love in a foreign country where you don't even speak the language? This video shows you how.

Baby Winged Cupid's got competish! This French spot for Durex has a mystical used purple condom package that flies through town inspiring old folks, male cops and teens to do the nasty. That's right, teens.

[Submit your own Gawker Stalker sightings to stalker@gawker.com] Jan. 21 @ 9 p.m. Christo and Jeanne-Claude of The Gates just now at Artisanal. They were sweet and amazing.

Sometimes it's fascinating to just sit back and watch an ad campaign get progressively farther and farther away from any intelligible sales pitch, as the ad masterminds behind it become more and more convinced that they are artists, damn it. Wrangler somehow got itself tangled up with French admen for its truly vapid "We Are Animals" campaign, currently underway. First those guys made some existentialist tripe about life and death to sell Wranglers, for chrissake. But at least that had some "concept" behind it. Now they're just showing a crawling baby. That's it. LOLwhut:

Scandale! Okay, not really, it's France after all; what would constitute a personal scandal there? The French president, Nicholas Sarkozy (not to be confused with Jean-Pierre Jeunet's favorite actor Dominique Pinon!) and his wife, Cecilia, told everyone they were splitting up yesterday, and said they'd have no further comment on the matter. Well, Madame Sarkozy changed her mind, okay? She's allowed! She unloaded about her marriage to a French newspaper today and it was all pretty run-of-the-mill stuff, except it prompted her ex to get all pissy with Le Monde when they called him for comment, snapping that hey, the French people "ask for no comment from me. It interests them much less than you, and they are right. And perhaps they have a greater sense of propriety and more discretion, sir." Take that! If only our own Great Leaders could put the press in their place as eloquently.