Can you hear it? That is the mingled sound of shrieking and a thousand dressing room mirrors shattering, echoing across the Hollywood Hills.

We've seen a Santorum campaign poster made out of (fake) Santorum, but this newest portrait of one of the crackpots who might be the Republican nominee for President (crazier things have happened) will get you a little bit more, um, excited. It's a picture of Rick Santorum made entirely out of gay porn.

If you saw Bridesmaids you probably thought it was hysterical. Well, just think of how much funnier it could have been if they'd included Jon Hamm's dirty sex positions, the descriptions of nasty smells, or the funny lines coming out of a little boy's mouth. Just the rapid fire succession of all these outtakes will make your mind boggle. And you'll probably laugh once or twice, too.

The Creative Arts Emmys were held on Sunday, and—like in years past—the B-Rolls for the Outstanding Writing, Variety Series nominees were top-notch. At the very top of that heap? This unemployment-themed introduction video for Conan O'Brien's Tonight Show.

Did you enjoy last week's compendium of Russia's Greatest Online Profile Pics? Marina Galperina has assembled another collection that dwarfs the first in both number and insanity. Peruse it! What else are you doing on a Monday afternoon in August?

OK, this is amazing. Here's "The Deleted Scenes," an iPhone 4 spoof by Adam Scott for Funny or Die. Watch as Scott and others talk—in the most vulgar way possible—about how the new iPhone changes (and does) everything.

The Way We Live Now: Eatin' Eggos. And that's just the winners among us. We eat waffles in lieu of any better prizes. None are available. Unless you're a hedge fundie, or a vagabond.

I don't know who or what is behind "Comedy.com," but this is a very amusing parody of the Huffington Post.

In our meritorious Monday media column: Judd Apatow questions Ken Auletta's wit, a reporter tries to pretend he is not a vicious murderer, Americans are cheap bastards when it comes to news, and all you need to know about Playboy.

What does some state politico in Maryland have to say to the WaPo about all this?

We take our eye off the Detroit News for a few days and what happens? Former NYT movie critic and amateur cigar smuggler Elvis Mitchell is found to owe the IRS half a million bucks. Slow down, Elvis!

Ha, some fine individual has taken the time to obsessively write a Twitter feed called "Bad Taglines," which is nothing but smart-ass slogans for various companies. They're kind of dumb. But funny dumb. Let's just show you some, okay? Sure.

On the Today show, Hoda and Kathie Lee took suggestions from Facebook friends. One was for Hoda to date Anderson Cooper. Awkward pause... "Interesting idea....," stifled laughter. They believe he is homosexual, you see.

With its eighth season—begins in January!—lumbering towards us like old Randy, American Idol remains so big that it's hard to quite figure out the size and shape of it. What makes up the pop corn 'n bubblegum singing competition? And, more importantly, who's watching? Well lots of people are, but we suspect a smaller number are doing the rabid voting, making the signs, and wearing the t-shirts than ever before. It's become clear that the obsessed Idol fan demographic has, over the years, been distilled into two core groups: scary/crazy adults with lots of problems and, you know, little kids who are allowed to be a little nutty because, well, they're kids. As a visual example of a mix of the cute kid and the borderline crazy, we present you, after the jump, with a video of The Worst Idol Day Ever, as witnessed by some of its most devoted fans. We just think it's really funny. In particular the girl in the middle.

All ads suck! Unless they involve hidden camera pranks that hilariously mock average people through the use of monetary technicalities. OfficeMax is advertising some cheapo back-to-school sale with an ad campaign consisting of a guy going around New York and paying for all types of things with pennies-and his escapades are all caught on tape! Despite our annoying "too-cool-for-school Brooklyn hipster" pose around here, we have to admit this is the funniest ad campaign we've seen since Gary Busey started giving out free advice. Still, don't shop at OfficeMax or else you're a total pawn of the machine. Click through to see two of the spots: dude attempts to buy deli food with pennies, and dude attempts to buy used car with pennies. Chuckle at the rage of the working class!:

A government worker in Japan got in trouble this week for looking at porn at work. Specifically, his computer at his place of employment recorded 780,000 hits on porn sites in nine months. Assuming 22 work days per month, that's nearly 4,000 hits per day! Quite a feat. Even more impressive: he totally got away with in for nine months.

Hey, remember that "Black guy as the plague of darkness" Jewish children's finger puppet set that you derived so much racial and religious amusement from last week? Well Jewishstore.com must have gotten the mild whiff of bad publicity that its crazy puppet was generating, because the black man of darkness has now been magically replaced by a far more vague representation of said plague! Before and after photos of the educational puppet array, below.