Todd Haynes’s Carol is simple, elegant, and devastating. It tells a story of pre-Stonewall gay love between two women, who become what they are using no specific societal blueprint (none existed for lesbians in the ‘50s), but through their love for each other. Carol (Cate Blanchett) is a mother going through a divorce who happens upon Therese (Rooney Mara), a younger shopgirl in her 20s, and is immediately enchanted. What ensues is a love story that is told with tenderness, pacing, and melodrama that evokes the era depicted in the film. Sometimes it shouldn’t even work—like when during an emotional peak between Carol and Therese, it starts snowing out of nowhere—but it always does, thanks to the tremendous directing, writing, and performances of everyone involved. Carol is, simply, one of the year’s finest movies and its final shot is among the most indelible I’ve ever seen. This movie imprints itself on you, and what’s more, you want it to.

For too long, gay experience was defined by outsiders who tended to condemn rather than empathize. As reporting has become democratized and stigma has eroded, more and more people who actually live the experience—the real experts—have been able to share it. The new documentary directed by BET’s Clay Cane Holler If You Hear Me: Black and Gay in the Church facilitates that sort of modern sharing in interviews with several black LGBT people who have vast experience with having their identities shaped, tested, and sometimes flat-out rejected by their churches. It dismisses the notion that being gay and Christian is paradoxical and it helps explain why it’s hard for even those who feel maligned by the church have a hard time leaving it. You can watch it in its entirety here:

A 40-year-old man from East London named Stephen Port has been charged with murdering four men he met on “gay dating websites,” according to the Evening Standard. His weapon of choice? Lethal doses of the drug GHB, which is known as the “date rape drug,” but is also used recreationally, in bodybuilding, and by John Stamos.

Yesterday, the New York office of the largest online male escort service, Rentboy, was raided by the NYPD and Department of Homeland security. Its CEO, Jeffrey Hurant, and six other employees were arrested. They are accused of facilitating prostitution, among other charges. After the raid, a Rentboy escort and former porn performer reached out to Gawker, offering to share his experiences working as an escort via Rentboy (and briefly, in its office). I interviewed him last night for two hours and the results of that interview have been organized and lightly edited into the first-person essay below. The subject requested to remain anonymous.

A few years ago, I talked to a guy in his mid-30’s on Grindr who said he wanted to have condomless sex with me. He assured me he was on Truvada. I declined but kept in touch. When I started writing my first Truvada story in late 2013, I wanted first-hand accounts of PrEP users so I reached back out to him in an attempt to interview him. He flaked on me multiple times and I didn’t hear from him again until a few weeks ago. He hit me up on Facebook to tell me he missed our interviews because he was on meth at the time. Furthermore, he had just gotten out of Rikers. He told me if I ever wanted to publish something about what it’s like to be a (white) gay man in that jail, I should hit him up. I agreed immediately, met him for brunch, and had him tell me his story. He asked to remain anonymous. The first-person account below is the result of our interview.

If prostitution is the world’s oldest profession, the world’s second oldest profession must be male politician with an anti-gay voting record who enjoys the dicks of men. Ladies and gentlemen, meet North Dakota House of Representatives member Randy Boehning (R).

Depending on where and how you were looking, it was a terrific year for gay pop culture... or a rotten one. While representations of gay folk in media have never been more varied, they still aren't varied enough. They are still overwhelmingly white, overwhelmingly affluent, overwhelmingly male*. Below are some quick summaries of the conclusions that I've drawn from some of the gay-oriented pop culture I consumed this year. When thinking about this post and why these representations matter at all, I used these words from bell hooks's intro to Black Looks as my guide: "It is only as we collectively change the way we look at ourselves and the world that we can change how we are seen."

The Food and Drug Administration is lifting its 31-year ban on blood donation from men who sleep with men. But don't get all excited and gay about it, gays.

In a hilarious blow to the credibility of an ex-gay organization, a billboard purporting to depict "identical twins: one gay, one not" actual features the same model twice. He is gay, and both of him were born that way.

Alan Turing is a prime example of the kind of historical figure people cite as proof that one's sexuality has no bearing on one's accomplishments. Turing essentially invented the computer and formalized much that comes with it, including the algorithm and the concept of artificial intelligence. According to Winston Churchill, Turing made the single biggest contribution to the Allies' victory in World War II. How could it possibly matter that he was also gay?

If the stock photo above makes you uncomfortable, survey says: you are not alone. It's the top answer on the board.

A few years ago, OWN's Our America with Lisa Ling profiled ex-gays and the gay-conversion industry. Ex-gays tend to arouse the ire of gays and their allies because of what their life path implies: that homosexuality is changeable if one tries hard enough. Thus by not putting effort into being straight, one is choosing to be gay.

In the latest chapter of the internet's favorite e-book, Human Obliterates Valid Point with Bumbling Delivery, actor Rose McGowan recently took all the gay men that you can think of—all that your eye could see, all that you could grease up with Crisco and fit in an infinite amount of Olympic size swimming pools—to task during a recent episode of Bret Easton Ellis's podcast. "Gay men are as misogynistic as straight men, if not more so. I have an indictment of the gay community right now, I'm actually really upset with them," McGowan said.

If any piece of writing was tailored for the Washington Post's "Post Everything" section, surely it's the short essay from Evangelicals for Marriage Equality board member Matt Stolhandske titled "I'm a gay rights activist. I want to give $150,000 to someone who opposes gay marriage."

Former adorable little peanut Raven-Symoné discussed her unorthodox coming out on last night's Oprah: Where Are They Now? by invoking an increasingly common refrain: "I don't label myself."

Out TV writer/producer Peter Nowalk is using the gay character in the show he created, How To Get Away With Murder, to push his gay agenda. And that is a wonderful thing since equality is his agenda. Last night's premiere featured a brief scene in which Connor (played by Jack Falahee) hooks up with an IT guy to obtain a piece of evidence. The sex scene featured making out and Connor telling the dude to, "Turn over," so that he could kiss his way down to the IT guy's ass. Pretty racy for network.

This is how you do it. Earlier today at a press conference regarding Senate Bill 42 and House Bill 177, which would expand Pennsylvania's hate crime law to include attacks based on sexuality and gender identity, the former bill's author, State Senator Jim Ferlo of Pittsburgh, came out as gay. He did it like this:

Rapper Cakes da Killa appeared on The Hot 97 Morning Show last week, despite not having a song on the New York hip-hop station's playlist. The reason hosts Ebro Darden and Peter Rosenberg invited Cakes on is because Cakes is gay and skilled. And not only is he gay and a rapper, but he's the kind of gay rapper who will correct you if you call him a gay rapper, as Ebro did early on in their interview. Cakes told Ebro that he considers himself not a gay rapper, but "a rapper that happens to be gay. There's no gay mailmen, but there are mailmen that are gay." Feisty.

A 46-year-old Los Angeles man whose "homosexual behavior" is listed on his medical records as a "chronic problem" is suing his doctor and a healthcare network, reports NBC Los Angeles.

"Yeah, I'd fuck Diddy," says Los Angeles-based battle rapper Daylyt in this new VladTV interview. "I'm not gonna front, I'd fuck the shit out of Diddy...Like, why not? Diddy's attractive. Get him off, like, a bottle of Ciroc, a shot of Ciroc, he got plenty of Ciroc. I'll fuck...Like, pause, no homo, let's really be honest, Diddy thick, yo."