A roundup of people who will be celebrating their birthdays on Friday, Saturday and Sunday is below.

Last night on Fox News, Geraldo Rivera took a hit out on David Earls, a convicted child-rapist whose atrociously low sentence Bill O'Reilly has been demagoguing.

Don Broderick, an angry white male who works for Fox News, drove into a Central Park bicyclist with "psychotic intent" last week and dragged him four blocks. What is it with Fox News's angry white (plus Geraldo) guys?

Remember when "Bruno" fell bare-assed into Eminem's lap at the MTV Movie Awards? Well, the fine folks over at Fox & Friends were so offended by that tasteless skit that they went outside to play football with women in lingerie!

• Union members at the Boston Globe will vote on the controversial concession package proposed by the New York Times Co. on June 8. [E&P]
• Last week's broadcast of Meet the Press earned the NBC chatfest its lowest ratings since David Gregory took over as moderator. [HuffPo]
• Supermarket tabloid smackdown: Us Weekly is standing up for integrity in journalism (and Brangelina) by waging war against In Touch. [TMZ, Gawker]
• Who says magazines are dead? The publisher of Interview is in the process of launching a quarterly design magazine called Modern. [Folio]
• Neil Patrick Harris will host the 2009 Tony Awards on June 7. [AP]
• The two American journalists who were first detained in North Korea two months will go on trial for "hostile acts" on June 4. [NYT]

Bar Refaeli eating lunch at Bar Pitti ... Lauren Conrad shopping with a friend at Topshop ... Josh Hartnett walking in Tribeca ... Seal leaving the Equinox in Soho ... Jerry Seinfeld arriving at Yankee Stadium right before Jay-Z turned up ... Geraldo Rivera walking in Midtown ... Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber jogging downtown ... Ben Affleck talking on his cell phone outside Rockefeller Center ... Agyness Deyn shooting a commercial with Gabriel Aubrey and later getting into an SUV... Ciara leaving her hotel ... and Joy and Regis Philbin walking home on the Upper West Side.

Valentino and Vogue co-hosted a cocktail party to benefit New Yorkers For Children at Valentino's Madison Avenue store last night. Guests included Fabiola Beracasa and Erin Fetherston (left), Fern Mallis, Tinsley Mortimer, Valesca Guerrand-Hermès, Maggie Betts, Paul Sevigny, Bebe Neuwirth, Jennifer Creel, Selita Ebanks, Alina Cho, Kate Schelter, Antony Todd, Tatiana Platt, Kevin Liles, Denise Wohl, Di Petroff, Felicia Taylor, Erica and Geraldo Rivera, Sylvester and Gillian Miniter, Dori Cooperman, Maggie Rizer, Allison Sarofim, Lydia Fenet, Vanessa von Bismarck, Dayssi Olarte de Kanavos, Susan Shin, Tracy Stern, Melissa Berkelhammer, Stephanie LaCava, and, yes, "Real Housewife" Alex McCord and her husband Simon van Kempen. [PMc, Wireimage, VF, SF]

Two weeks ago the news surfaced that Viacom chief Sumner Redstone and his second wife, Paula Fortunato, were divorcing after five years of marriage. Much was made of Redstone and Fortunato's 39-year age gap and the couple's pre-nup, which will provide Fortunato with a $5 million fortuno for the five years she spent by the not-so-healthy billionaire's side. But she's hardly the only one who has been married to someone who could easily pass for her father or granddad. After the jump, a list of famous New York couples and their equally famous age gaps.

♦ Rachael Ray's reps are denying reports that Ray has throat cancer, although they do admit she's having surgery for a cyst on her vocal cord in December. [People]
♦ It was a busy weekend for Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. With hoards of paparazzi in tow, the couple made an appearance at the premiere of Changeling, where Angelina showed off her newest tattoos (the coordinates of the places where each of her kids was born) and told reporters that she and Brad are planning to have even more kids. [NYDN, OK!, previously]
♦ Howard Stern and Beth Ostrosky tied the knot on Friday night at Le Cirque with Billy Joel performing in front of guests like Denise Rich, Joan Rivers, Barbara Walters, and Donald Trump. [NYP, Us]
♦ A fire at Geraldo Rivera's home on Friday didn't singe his mustache, but it did damage the two 1954 Jaguars in his garage. [P6]

• Madonna and Alex Rodriguez had a big secret dinner at Dos Caminos Third Avenue in New York. They arrived half an hour apart, sat in the back at a quiet, "alcove-like" table and left by separate exits. Then they denied the Mexican food rendezvous to the press, since Rodriguez's soon-to-be-ex-wife has the crazy idea Madonna sneaks around with A-Rod . But Us Weekly and Page Six each has a source who saw the dinner, so it's basically confirmed.

So we're still getting threatening emails regarding the Sarah Palin Emailgate, wishing us well in prison and advising us to not "drop the soap." So it comes as a relief that, this morning, we finally got the best and last word in legal counsel, guaranteeing our freedom: a sassy TV judge on the Mike & Juliet show. She says we're fine and Geraldo Rivera even agrees with her! So that's a relief. Plus, it was just funny to see Mike say "hack hack hack" over and over again with nary a mirror in sight. Clip is above.

Now that Hurricane Gustav seems to have safely blown past New Orleans and Baton Rouge, we can turn our attention to ridiculing TV journalists who pointlessly risked life and limb to set up more of those clichéd, wind-whipped hurricane-reporting shots. Even CNN can't resist making fun of those guys, and it employs half of them. The Washington Post said storms tend to produce a "High Chance of Blowhards" and added that "no one covers a house fire by rushing into the burning building, or reports on a war by doing stand-ups in the middle of a tank battle." True, but that's just because there are firemen and soldiers to keep journalists out of those dangerous situations. They'd totally shoot there if they could! Click the video icon to watch some of the most insane moments so far.

If you're stuck at work this afternoon and in need of a little amusement because you're bored and annoyed that everyone is already relaxing and you're still sitting behind your desk, might we suggest the following video from the archives of one Geraldo Rivera from the 1980s? Watch as Geraldo poses as a thug, buys a kilo of coke, busts the dealers, and then tests it to make sure it's Colombia's finest. (He sort of inadvertently gives away his own personal experience, though, when he says, "It looks very pure!" as soon as he cuts into the key with a pen knife.) "Do you know you just sold a kilo to cocaine to Geraldo Rivera?," a cop shouts at the suspects. "You're the most famous coke dealers in America right now!" The video below.

1) Eric Villency and Kimberly Guilfoyle threw a cocktail party on Saturday evening at their house in Bridgehampton, where Richard Johnson, Dan Abrams, Dave Zinczenko, Geraldo Rivera and Erica Levy, Scott Currie, Rob Wiesenthal, Alina Cho, and Gigi Stone mingled. [Huffington Post/Pmc]

The world's most famous half-Puerto Rican/half-Jewish man with a moustache, Geraldo Rivera, will turn 65 tomorrow. Also celebrating on the fourth of July: Yankees owner George Steinbrenner, who will be 78 and playwright Neil Simon, who is turning 81. Other people celebrating birthdays over the long weekend: RZA, 50 Cent, Chuck Close, Matthew Barney, Chuck Klosterman, Edie Falco, and former Mets manager Willie Randolph.

The rumor that the Republican Party has a tape of Michelle Obama railing against "whitey" in Rev. Jeremiah Wright's church apparently surfaced two weeks ago on No Quarter, a blog operated by Larry Johnson, a self-described former CIA analyst and supporter of Obama's Democratic presidential rival Hillary Clinton. No evidence has emerged to corroborate the wild rumor, but Fox News went ahead and aired the charges on camera today. The justification?

Mustachioed embarrassment to the profession of journalism Geraldo Rivera appeared on The View today, where he castigated fellow blowhard Lou Dobbs for the sorts of things we have regularly attacked him for, but it was Geraldo saying it so we all felt a bit silly. Of course, Geraldo works for noted reasoned advocates of humane, sensible immigration reform Fox News, so this is really just another salvo in the tiresome Fox News vs. CNN (and sometimes NBC) battle. The clip is attached below.

Tax-evading wiretapper Jeanine Pirro, who might have knowingly tried to put an innocent man in jail this one time, lost a tooth on Geraldo last night when God became tired of her relentless lies and decided to punish her live on Fox News. The tooth, or maybe it was some sort of cosmetic cap designed to fraudulently misrepresent her evil-infested mouth, fell off right when she was saying something about how Democrats aren't really democratic because they have superdelegates. Geraldo just laughed at her and pretended to listen as she kept talking, but then later he said she had "consulted her dentist and is now back from the break ." You'll probably laugh too, at her and not with her:

The proud owner of the most famous mustache on cable news, Geraldo is the drama-loving tabloid journalist who currently hosts Geraldo at Large on Fox News.

Fox News television host Geraldo Rivera is looking for offended iPhone early adopters. If you're aggrieved by Apple's price cut and not satisfied with the $100 Apple Store credit, then a Fox producer wants to talk to you, like, now for tonight's 8 p.m. program, according to this Craigslist posting. We can't wait to see who Fox drums up to whine like a little baby, on air, over the time-honored custom of getting royally soaked when buying brand-new technology.