Yesterday afternoon, New York Times Co. CEO Janet Robinson abruptly announced her resignation. She may have been pushed out, though she got a nice fat "consulting" paycheck to cushion her fall. The important question now: who takes over?

Christopher Hitchens, the Clinton-loathing, religion-mocking, Kurd-loving, war-mongering, ball-waxing British drunk who contained multitudes and seemed to be insulting you somehow even when you agreed with him, which was precisely 59% of the time, has died of complications from esophageal cancer at the age of 62.

Kleenex-sponsored cry-athon Extreme Makeover: Home Edition where living football Ty Pennington and a bunch of well-wishers would redo a home for an impossibly virtuous but down on their luck family each week is cancelled.

The Obama White House can be terrible at leading the nation. It's been incredibly soft on Wall Street and often horrible on basic human rights. But it can stand proud on its family Facebook policy! At a time when American parents help sneak their legally underaged kids onto Facebook, Sasha and Malia Obama are quite sensibly told to stay away from the social network.

Glen Maxey, the first openly gay member of the Texas State Legislature and longtime Democratic activist, spent most of last summer helping a reporter for a "national news outlet" nail down persistent rumors of Rick Perry's sexual relationships with men. The story got killed. So Maxey has published an e-book laying out the evidence. Among the charges: Rick Perry has a small dick.

Crazy homeless lady in training Courtney Love is about to be homeless for real because her landlord is evicting her from the $27,000 a month Village townhouse she's been living in since February. Apparently Courtney tried to burn the place down. Of course she did.

It's officially awards season now that the secretive geniuses at the Hollywood Foreign Press Association have announced the nominees for the Golden Globes, Hollywood's self-love and booze fest. The Artist appears to be the big winner, but that's not surprising at all. However there are some shocks to be had.

Speaking of youth-obsessed Russian leader, bad husband, and likely ballot-stuffer Vladimir Putin, have you looked at his face lately? Rumors about Putin's plastic surgery have been floating around since September, but his face keeps getting stranger. At a recent elections-related appearance, he looked like Rachel Zoe. Fillers, I'm thinking, plus Botox on the forehead.

Tonight, the American Broadcast Company airs Barbara Walters Presents: The 10 Most Fascinating People of 2011, wherein TV's grande dame of celebrity reacharounds offers profiles of some of the most spellbinding figures of our time. This year's list includes the likes of Katy Perry (fascinating breasts), Donald Trump (fascinating hair), Simon Cowell (also fascinating breasts), Herman Cain (finds breasts fascinating), and the Kardashians (fascinatingly stupid). As a companion piece, we have compiled this list of The 10 Least Fascinating People of 2011. Think of it as a love letter to everyone who bored, bothered, or left us utterly cold over the past 12 months.

Amid election discrepancies and in the wake of rumored affairs and spousal abuse, the wife of despotic Russian leader Vladimir Putin has gone missing. Where's Lyudmila?

ZOMG, Justin Bieber is trending! How can we short the Jonas Brothers?? That, apparently, is the sort of conversation that's becoming more and more plausible on Wall Street; hedge funds are increasingly turning to Twitter, Facebook and YouTube trends to place social media driven bets in the "tens of billions of dollars," according to a company that sells them data.

The first thing everyone on the internet—or everyone on Twitter, at least—remarked when Demi Moore announced her divorce from dangling Chad Ashton Kutcher was, "What is she going to do about her Twitter handle?!" Moore has been known as @MrsKutcher for years, what will she do now? Nothing, so stop asking!

Breaking meta-news: New York Times media reporter Brian Stelter has pulled a Weiner. No, not that kind. No, not that kind, either.

After every Republican presidential candidate except Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum dropped out of his debate, chronic mango-lacquered television ailment Donald Trump has decided to drop the whole thing. But "near-total lack of interest from the invitees," you won't be surprised to learn, is not the reason he gives. He is suddenly concerned about conflicts of interest, such as him running for president later on. Very reasonable. Hmm.

Lindsay Lohan's Playboy issue hits newsstands this week, amid widespread disappointment. Over the last six years, every part of Lindsay has been photographed repeatedly. (Her latest nip slip occurred this morning.) Now presenting Lindsay Lohan: A Portrait of the Starlet as the Sum of Her Private Parts. NSFW after the jump.

Fashionista is running a series on "Fashion Intern Horror Stories," and the best one—about the world's "best known supermodel" peeing all over a white suit—makes for a workable blind item:

Great news from the official top paper of historical world record, import, & fame, &c., the New York Times: former executive editor Bill Keller won't use "illegals" to refer to illegal immigrants in his profound-ish columns! What's the big deal? Perhaps that he was using it left and right in his column the other day and everyone got mad at him for this? Indeed, it is so.

Whoops! Remember when Rupert Murdoch's News of the World was revealed to have illegally listened to the voicemails of teen murder victim Milly Dowler? And how the bastards actually erased the voicemails, leading Dowler's family to falsely believe that their little girl was still alive and checking her messages? And how Murdoch killed off NOTW in shame and a panicked attempt to avert scandal when it all came out? Well, there's a slight wrinkle.

In the past, we have used this space to mock new New York Times columnist Frank Bruni for starting out poorly, then getting progressively, unbelievably worse. He seems to lack any convictions at all, let alone interesting ones; though he's only been on the job for half a year, he's already been reduced to padding his column with excruciatingly boring stories from his own life, due to his apparent dearth of worthwhile ideas about important issues.

Nate Berkus — the window-treatmenting savante crafted out of a spare Ugg boot by the Great Goddess Oprah herself — is having a bad week. Harpo and Sony TV have confirmed that The Nate Berkus Show will cease production after two snore-inducing seasons of tween bedroom renovations and dollar-store fashion shows for unfabulous women.