Who thought crying for 45 minutes straight would be so fun? Well, try watching Glee, which will open up a can of emotional mayhem on you and then take a glitter shit on your heart. And you'll love it.
God, this show has really gone downhill. Instead of the singing and dancing that we love, they filled McKinley High with a bunch of old chefs sitting and bitching. It was way more knife skills than jazz hands. Bleck.
Do you know what it takes to get Slushie out of your hair? Patience, persistence, and Palmolive, that's what. We were soaking in two of those Ps, as the kids prepared for a frosty beverage right to the face.
There's nothing like a good screaming match, and last night the fights were dirtier than the blog posts that Nerdy McFroerson writes about Rachel. Who are you backing? Team Rachel? Team Quinn?!
• Heidi Klum and Seal have a new addition to the family: Lou Sulola, who was born on Friday night and joins siblings Johan, Henry, and Leni. [People]
• Tyra Banks ought to be in a good mood today. Not only has she dropped four dress sizes recently, she's been named the "top-earning primetime TV star" by Forbes thanks to the $30 million she's collected over the past year. [Daily Mail, MSNBC]
• The latest legal tiff between Christie Brinkley and Peter Cook is over: The couple has settled their dispute, which means neither of them will be heading off to jail. [People]
• Was Penelope Cruz sporting a giant sapphire and diamond ring the other night because she really is engaged to Javier Bardem? And did she wear a bulky sweater over her dress because she's pregnant? So many questions, so few answers. Sigh. [P6, NYDN]
The war of the sexes got hopped up on speed last night. It was like watching the Billie Jean King/Bobby Riggs tennis match on fast forward, but with musical breaks. Unlike that famous contest, no one here was a winner.
The only thing gayer than Kristen Chenoweth singing a Liza Minnelli song from Cabaret on Glee is...well, there is nothing gayer than Kristen Chenoweth singing a Liza Minnelli song from Cabaret on Glee. And it was glorious!
Is this show called A Gay Guy, Two Pregnant Chicks, and a Pizza Place That Sponsors a Football Team, because last night, that's what it was. What it lacked in music it made up for in soul—and Beyoncé.
Last night our beloved Glee club was almost destroyed by the dastardly Acafellas. Almost, but thanks to Josh Groban, not. Last night we laughed, we cried, and we fell for Bell Biv Devoe like a teenager in 1990. Amazing!
Last night we asked Glee to go steady. It said yes, but told us it's not putting out. That's OK because the episode had more great lines than a Fashion Week after party. Oh, and of course, musical numbers!
There is nothing Hollywood likes better than a theme party and last night TV's big wigs assembled the themeiest of launches, going back to the land of their primal fears, high school for the Glee premiere.
I sincerely hope you watched the premiere of Glee last night. Fox's new funny/sad series about a high school glee club was spunky, precocious, and sincere—normally things that are annoying. And yet, somehow on this show, they aren't at all.
TV upfronts are happening across the land, and there were some surprises. Some shows were canceled, others renewed. The circle of life, of sowing and reaping, continues.
