Welcome back to Midweek Madness! This week: What's Lindsay been watching on TV, what kind of roses will Kim Kardashian have at her wedding, and what Ashton and Jake looked like before cosmetic surgery. [Jezebel]

This newsman recently fired a staff member because they saw him trying to hire a hooker. This power gay actually likes to sleep with women. And this daytime talker has pissed off all her co-hosts. Maybe she can pay for their favors?

This celeb was sleeping with her best friend's boyfriend and got so upset about their engagement, she took the ring! This actor is back to using blow and playing with hookers. We wonder what his best friend is up to.

Not even Viagra will help this actor's serious case of whiskey dick. This actress got pregnant with her best friend's boyfriend's baby. And this actress is trying to convince the press she's dating a man everyone knows is a closet case. The only secrets anyone ever has are in the bedroom.

This star is such a health nut that she has her kids on a diet and their school is complaining they're too skinny. This reality star knocked up a woman who is not his girlfriend. That's not healthy for anyone.

This celeb has a weird request when he goes to the gym. This Real Housewife wants to make life hell for new cast members. And this actor's dirty joke ended in a sexual harassment lawsuit. He should leave the locker room humor in the locker room.

Welcome back to Midweek Madness when we check in with gossip mags Ok!, Us, Star, In Touch and Life & Style. This week: Suri Cruise's $100,000 treehouse, Brad's present for Angelina, and Rihanna and Chris Brown. [Jezebel]

This singer isn't just cheating on his wife, he's getting naughty with one of his daughter's good buddies. Slumber parties must be a blast! This acting couple puts on disguises and donates time to charity. How disgustingly wholesome!

These two married stars are fighting over the kids, money, and sex, and their impending divorce will be contentious. This former actress is now homeless in New York. Only one of these things is a tragedy.

Not only is this reality TV lady using a crew member's prescription, she's also sleeping with him. This singer refused the invite to be on Oprah's farewell special. And this actress is sleeping with fans for money and drugs. Maybe she should get a reality show.

This Hollywood lady's shaman told her to drink animal blood every day. This TV actor likes to frequent Thai brothels. And this royal couldn't stop staring at Jennifer Aniston's boobs. Looks like the shaman's spell is finally working!

This leading man's wife thinks he's just getting a massage, but he's really getting the full treatment. This Hollywood star harrassed his daughter's ex until he committed suicide. Gossip legend Michael Musto unleashes a fury of blind gossip. This can't end happily.

Welcome back to Midweek Madness. Every Wednesday, we schedule sexytime with gossip mags Ok!, Us, Star, In Touch and Life & Style. This week: Justin Theroux and Jennifer Aniston, Sean Penn and ScarJo, and Kim Kardashian's "graphic phone sex." [Jezebel]

This star of an HBO show is supposedly coming out of the closet any day now. This sitcom star is trying to stay in the closet. And this group of bisexual Hollywood moms has a monthly playdate/orgy. Did a gay bomb go off in Hollywood or something?

Before this lovely lady goes on talk shows, she needs to get a scolding from her publicist to be "proper." Some celebrities are using body doubles to fool the press about their extra-marital activities. Maybe they'll start sending proxies to appear on The View?

This star's baby has a birth defect, possibly because she did blow while pregnant. This celebrity marriage happened because the female celeb lost a bet. This head of state is secretly gay. And this actor's wife's drug habit is making him miss work. Thankfully she's not with child.

A hacker has been setting the internet on fire with nude pictures of Blake Lively, but which three guys did she send them to in the first place? This actress' kid accidentally brought her pot to school. And this actress is trying to fool her boyfriend into getting her pregnant. Is she sending naked pictures?

She played a mother on a sitcom and an upcoming book alleges she had a very different relationship with her younger costars than that of "Mom." These two stars have been instructed to stop having an affair. Maybe they both need a spanking from mommy.

Welcome back to Midweek Madness, in which we gorge ourselves on gossip from OK!, Us, Star, In Touch and Life & Style. This week: Prince Harry's life as a bachelor, Kim Kardashian's baby, and Justin Timberlake and Ashley Olsen. [Jezebel]

Lesbians aren't usually known for their promiscuity, but this famous lady who loves ladies certainly is. This actor gets hard during love scenes. This TV star loves GHB. And this celeb is always stepping out on his lady. Is no one faithful?