Lock up your testicles. Octomom Nadya Suleman is on the prowl and bringing her love life into your living room, via a dating show on world's randomest cable network HDNet.

Who's the latest to hop on the Charlie Sheen Manic Episode Train, currently heading express to Someone Getting Seriously Hurt And Probably Dead? Yes, it's loudmouth billionaire Mark Cuban, owner of the Dallas Mavericks, who's apparently talking with Sheen about developing TV shows for Cuban's cable channel HDNet:

Mark Cuban concedes his HDNet has been permanently kicked off Time Warner Cable Systems nationwide. It's a rough time for the mouthy internet entrepreneur.

Dan Rather's contract with Mark Cuban's TV network HDNet should not be up until nearly a year from now, assuming the terms Rather disclosed just before he inked the deal still hold. But would the contract prevent the former CBS Evening News anchor from contributing in some way to Tina Brown's forthcoming news website The Beast? Perhaps that's what Brown and Rather were discussing during a "very long lunch" at The Park on Tenth Avenue, as reported by a Post spy. Though Rather's work at HDNet has garnered some positive recognition, it's not nearly as visible as his work for CBS was. A Web gig or partnership would give Rather a shot at regaining more of the attention he once had — and that any veteran TV newsman would crave. Perhaps the skilled lawyers working for Brown's business partner Barry Diller can work something out on the proud old newshound's behalf. [Post]

Blogging billionaire Mark Cuban dropped by a meeting of Texas's Cable and Telecommunications Association for Marketing members in San Antonio yesterday. His message: "The Internet is dead. It's had its time; say goodbye." Cuban went on to explain that high-definition entertainment (like that offered on his HDNet channels) is the present and the future, promising that cable companies can leverage those big, pretty screens for computer-like features.

Flyover country may now know Mark Cuban better for his quick hips and jazz fingers on Dancing With the Stars, but the Web entrepreneur still likes to talk shop. A lot. He found an ear or two on Friday when AllThingsD's Walt Mossberg interviewed him at an otherwise obscure conference in Providence, Rhode Island. There, he explained that most everything you think is going well isn't really. Sorry. Some choice quotes after the jump.

Avert your eyes from this embarrassment: print ads promoting Dan Rather's awesome new gig on HDNet, Dan Rather Reports. He's explosive! Just don't pull the pin. Or ask why his mic still has a cable.