In the name of getting good statistical data, New York City is randomly denying poor people access to a program designed to stave off homelessness. If those unlucky people become homeless, you know it works! Oh... is that frowned upon?

The Way We Live Now: reclaiming our world. The homeless are reclaiming the houses. The arbs are reclaiming the arbitrage. The consumers are reclaiming the debt. Everyone's "reclaiming" the gold, from greedy Mother Earth. Get yours, or stop whining!

A police officer ticketed an illegally parked car and peeked inside. There sat a mummified female human. Apparently the owner's friend died while sitting there and the owner "continued to dress the body and drive around with it."

Juan-Carlos Cruz, report CNN, used to host Calorie Commando on the Food Network. He's now "accused of plotting to hire homeless people to carry out a murder," according to police in California.

Walking away from your hopelessly underwater mortgage: everyone's doing it! But a new study says that these "strategic" defaults ("strategic"= commonsensical) are driven by anger and fear, not rational calculation. Well. There are plenty of reasons to be angry.

Starting Tuesday, employed residents of New York City homeless shelters will be charged rent. A family of three making $25,000/year will have to pay $926/month. The worst part: Mike Bloomberg is your new landlord. Take that, homeless people! [NYDN]

The Way We Live Now: Staunchly homeless. Some of us try to deny it; some of us try to hide it; but all of us are homeless, or nearly homeless, or one state budget cut from becoming homeless. It's trendy.

Last night, the New York Times' Natasha Lennard donned the universal hobo disguise—fur trapper hat and crumpled up newspapers—to pose as a homeless person. Why? So an annual census of the city's homeless population wouldn't count her.

H&M took some heat last week after it was revealed that one of the company's stores in Midtown regularly destroyed its unsold merchandise rather than give the items to charity. The Swedish retailer revised its policy the next day, but now it's the mayor's turn on the hot seat. It seems the NYPD has been incinerating or shredding the counterfeit clothing that it's seized over the past year, thus "abandoning a practice of giving knockoff garments to groups that help the needy." [NYT]

What do you think retail chains like H&M do with all the perfectly good clothing that they don't manage to sell? If you guessed "slash it to shreds and dump it in the garbage," give yourself a prize.

Did you hear what Prince William did earlier this week? He threw on a hoodie and pretended he was homeless for a night, camping out under a bridge in London so he could see what "life on the streets" is really like:

The Way We Live Now: At home. With Ma. And Pa. And the leaky basement pipes, and the laundry machine, and our broken dreams. And the jug we rent from the United Homeless Organization. It's a living, hey! Amirite?

It's been a few weeks since downtown artist Dash Snow died of a heroin overdose. But photographer Ryan McGinley is now speaking out about the death of his close friend. In the new issue of Vice, he recounts some of the great times they shared over the years, like "sniffing coke off toilet seats [and] doing bumps off each other's fists" in "the bathroom of every bar below 14th Street." Oh, and how Snow and one of his other friends would get wasted and have fun at the expense of homeless people:

Today's New York Times Page One recession-porn dispatch is so unrelentingly hackneyed that William Shatner ought to read it aloud to bongos. And it neglects to mention that the hero—a gruff homeless-encampment leader—is a convicted child rapist.

Ad mogul and fill-in MSNBC anchor Donny Deutsch thinks it's a totally super idea to ship New York's homeless population to far-flung places! At least that's what he said under his breath today as the cable network went to commercial break. His reaction probably won't come as much of a surprise, of course. But prepare yourself for the news that Deutsch's worked out a marketing deal to make JetBlue the official airline of New York City's unwanted masses. It's bound to happen sooner or later. The clip is below.

Interested in trading New York City for, say, Paris, but don't have the cash to buy a plane ticket? No problem! Pretend you're homeless and the City of New York will gladly pay for it:

Enlightened hip hop mogul Russell Simmons tells New York that the worst part of living in New York is dealing with the "extreme poverty." So does that mean the yoga fanatic gives money to panhandlers? "Every one that asks!" he says. Be sure to pass along this bit of info to the homeless man standing on your corner later today. He'll be glad you did. [NYM]

The Way We Live Now: Broke as a joke from coast to coast. They're selling heroin in Maine. They've sent everyone on furlough in California. And in the Midwest, you can't even leave salt outside without enterprising Americans swiping it.

Las Vegas is taking their federal stimulus money and using it to deceive tourists into thinking things are okay. By putting homeless people in concrete boxes until they're homeless again. Nice. [Las Vegas Sun]

If you recently lost your job in advertising—or you're still employed but have lots of free time on your hands—you can still make sure that you're putting your creative talents to good use. Ad copywrighter Todd Norem recently helped a homeless man in Minneapolis come up with new signs to use when he hits the streets to pandhandle. The result? His "client," Ed, reported "at least a 800 percent increase in gross income on days his media ran." Now we'll just have to hope copywrighters in NYC rise to the occasion and do their part, too. A couple of other clever signs Norem created for Ed after the jump.