LES resident Andrew Krucoff does a highly-useful roundup of health violations on the Lower East Side:

The Sundance Film Festival is halfway over, and so far nothing has happened. Except:

Joyce Wadler at the Times stalks Keith McNally until he gets sick of her. Mr. McNally, who has bumbled into success with Balthazar, Pastis, and now Schiller's Liquor Bar, is the idiot savant of nightlife hotspots, according to Wadler. Staff meetings sound entertaining:

In Alexandra Wolfe's New York Observer profile of 'It Kid' Fabian Basabe yesterday, a source describes him as the "son of a South American telecom mogul or something." Ms. Wolfe does mention his father's bankruptcy proceedings in Florida. But also, there's the bank foreclosure on the family condo in Miami — the opinion on the condo's appeal was filed just in October.
Harbor Bay Condominiums vs. Fabian Basabe & May Basabe [Google cache

Just this morning, as I wedged myself into my dank East Village shower-hole, while in the airshaft outside an Eastern European woman screamed repeatedly for her cat — a cat named Basha, you might like to know — I thought to myself, 'Gee, I would appreciate knowing that there are people who are taking advantage of a good life.' Lo and behold, check today's lengthy profile of manchild about town, Fabian Basabe:

It's still a fairly new year, so if your resolution was to be less self-involved, here's a great chance to do something for other people. ("Other people" is defined as "people who are not yourself," if you're still confused.) The folks at New Yorkish are mounting a campaign to name a NYC street after someone completely random and — hopefully — really really horrible. They're accepting nominations now, operators are standing by.
Name a New York City Street! [New Yorkish]

I'm breaking New Year's resolution #44: I must discuss Soho House briefly. (Really, I'm as chagrined as you are.)

That class act Coyote Ugly is celebrating 11 years of bartendresses in wet t-shirts today. The gang at the NYC Bartenders & Patrons website is stoked to drink til they puke tonight:

After last week's opening madness, Manhattan's new mega-club Crobar goes for their second weekend. There's quite a spirited discussion on the Mother NYC discussion board about Crobar. Says one: "from all I have learned about Crobar that they seem to train their employees to be abusive, arrogant, insensitive fucks who are unable to read, much less be botherd with checking a guestlist." Wow, maybe the Times was right: perhaps the 80's are back.
Crobar [Motherboard]

Paris Hilton brings some satisfaction to the W Hotel last night:

A donation of two million dollars — or, the cost of 55 and a 1/2 Dodge Durangos — buys a shiny new fence around the Central Park Reservoir. I love Christmas! It's all about the humanitarian giving and caring.
Two People + $2 Million Equals a New Fence Around the Central Park Reservoir [NY Sun]

Below 14th is building a map of vacant East Village storefronts that would make good bars. Good timing; an East Village activist is getting ready to sue the State Liquor Authority because there are too many bars in the East Village. According to Anna Sawaryn, "There s violent crime on Avenue A. There s been a lot of stabbings..."

One of the two guys arrested at the Crobar opening night melee is identified as "Fabian Illera, 29." A reader wonders, sensibly, if this might be the same Fabian Illera who was arrested just this March on rather extreme charges of insurance fraud, forgery, grand larceny, and more.

As you're getting gussied up for tonight's Slate party — what? you're not going either? — relax into a few recent holiday party reports. From the Hearst office holiday party last Thursday:

Last night's Crobar opening: all of Tenth Avenue between 26th and 29th was a screaming, drunken, frenzied mass of the under-dressed skankocracy. My spies cruised by in a cab, got a look at the horror, and kept right on going as thousands of scantily-clad space prostitutes tried to hail their occupied taxi. An actual attendee writes in, underwhelmed:

Just a little public service announcement:

Page Six throws a little of its inky muscle behind the New York Nightlife Association's recent study of the effect of the smoking ban. The highlights of the NYNA's report:

In this week's rampage, Village Voice gossip-guy Michael Musto gives out a truly charming year-end award: the worst party invites of the year.

The Powering Up of the Power Lunch [NYT]

Of all the names of New York restaurants taken from their addresses, One Little West 12 has perhaps the longest.