Aww! New York Observer publisher and Ivanka Trump-lover Jared Kushner's dad Charles, who sponsored the work visa for then-Jersey gov Jim McGreevey's supposed Israeli lover-employee, has now hired his buddy McGreevey's new boyfriend to be the Kushner family corporation's chief investment officer! [NY Post]
Former New Jersey first lady Dina Matos McGreevey was just on It's Your Call With Lynn Doyle on the Comcast network, and we learned a lot about gay Americans. Like: you're probably married to one right now! According to some graphic they showed, "there are an estimated 2 million marriages where one spouse is gay." There wasn't really a source for that number so we'll assume Lynn and Dina just gave their best guess. Also there was an insane return from commercial where they showed the USS New Jersey and Lynn said "it is appropriately lit in pink, for breast cancer awareness, and also appropriate because of our guest." Because an estimated 2 million husbands across the country are secretly captaining huge pink battleships, sailing through the strait of betrayal and torpedoing the Good Ship Family.
On the Howard Stern show yesterday, Donald Trump noted that, according to a listener, his daughter "Ivanka was dating a 'very rich guy—not as rich as me, but a very rich guy' from a 'real estate family.'" Translation: That is basically a blessing from the goyim for New York Observer publisher Jared Kushner! ("Rich"="good.") Anyway, that's exactly the kind of Trumpism that we imagine gets the hackles up on Jared's daddy, New Jersey kingpin (and good pal of gay American Jim McGreevey) Charles Kushner. But hey, the real estate union of Jersey Jared and Manhattan Ivanka is good for everyone for now—just like an arranged marriage between little empires! Though we still don't think it's remotely possible that Jared will ever marry the shiksa. Prove us wrong, you adorable lovebirds! We want to believe.
We never thought this great day would come! But yesterday was the first day of school at Chelsea's General Theological Seminary for former New Jersey gov Jim McGreevey. Says the NYDN: "He avoided press outside the college, but spoke to the Daily News briefly. 'I'm trying to be respectful of the seminary and their culture. They're really low key,' he said." Heh. It's like you can see him whispering from the bushes. And just like that, no one will ever think of McGreevey as a self-serving closeted adulterous opportunistic scheming sloppy hack bridge and tunnel mess ever again!
Gay gov idiot turned seminarian Jim McGreevey has filed court papers that seem to be the faggiest escapade to hit New Jersey since Vito Spatafore first put on a leather harness. The Post does a particularly dreamy and lispy job with it:
The Post finally gives the wood to this week's revelation that Jim McGreevey (former New Jersey governor, Gay American, etc.) plans to become an Episcopal priest. (The news gives the paper an opportunity to summarize the recent conflict in the Anglican faith over the ordination of gays. It may be the most informative article the Post has ever provided its readership.) In any event, while we applaud the paper's vague restraint in its choice of headline, we think an event this joyous calls for a little more pizzazz.
As we told you Monday, Jim McGreevey actually is headed toward the seminary and a life of study and hot Episcopal devotion. Today's Star-Ledger comes in late and claims that he hasn't officially been accepted into the General Theological Seminary in West Chelsea—but we think that they're wrong and he has. Previous rumors that McGreevey was being sponsored by the Episcopal Diocese of Newark, however, are false. In fact, we hear they wanted nothing to do with him. That's weird!
On Oprah yesterday, the soon to be ex-wife of New Jersey's ex-governor debuted her candid tale of betrayal and heartbreak—at least, the parts of it the Post hasn't already covered—and also her adorable little-girl lisp. Here she's telling about how Jim "Gay American" McGreevey instructed her to behave like a certain heroic first lady. "Jackie Kennedy? Her husband was murdered!" Dina recalls saying. It's kind of the funniest Jackie reference since The House of Yes!
We hear that former New Jersey gov Jim McGreevey has a new career planned—and that he'll enter the General Theological Seminary in Manhattan next year. (We know—this is the second-craziest rumor we've heard this week! Please tell us we're wrong?) A religious-type person says that the Episcopal Diocese of Newark will sponsor his training for the priesthood. McGreevey, a former altar boy and a graduate of the Catholic University of America, broke with the Catholic church circa 2005; his daughter is being raised a Catholic. What all this means for his very nice boyfriend, or for his Jewish-institution-funding pal Charles Kushner (sponsor of Golan Cipel's work visa!), we're just not sure.
Remember that epochal Times story a few weeks back about how kids share beds with parents now, till toddlerhood and puberty and beyond? Well, Karen Cassidy, the New Jersey judge handling the Jim McGreevey custody proceedings, laid down the law yesterday: You gays can have the right to get civil unioned and not to be bludgeoned or whatever, but you'll NEVER get to replicate trend pieces meant for the heteroworld! From the Daily News:
Yeah, Sean, she's not the only one.
The Post has such the exclusive scoop! Dina McGreevey totally knew that her almost ex-husband, former NJ governor Jim, liked other dudes even before the citizens of New Jersey learned about it via his famous "gay American" speech. (So apparently she's not a total idiot!) In his memoir The Confession, Jim implied that Dina didn't suspect his gayosity until 2002, when he says she asked him about the nature of his relationship with now-estranged aide Golan Cipel. But the Post's mysterious source maintains that Dina knew even before then: "As far as I know, she never really confronted anyone about it, she just kinda let it slide." [Ed. Note: That's what he said.] But why? We suppose we'll just have to hotly anticipate Dina's memoir—"due out May 1st," the Post helpfully reminds us—even more hotly.
The custody battle between New Jersey's gay ex-governor and his straight almost-ex-wife continues to rage, just as her counter-memoir Silent Partner is being published. Random coincidence! Anyway, the latest bone of contention is whether the McGreeveys' daughter Jacqueline, 5, ought to be sharing a bed with Jim and his boyfriend (pictured). "It is one thing for children to sleep with a parent or parents. It is quite another for children to sleep with a parent and a third party...This situation is very different from our child getting in bed with me—there is never anyone else, male or female, in my bed," Dina said in a written response to Jim's divorce filing. Does that mean there won't be as many steamy lovemaking scenes in Silent Partner as there were in The Confession? Never mind then!
Dina Matmos McGreevey's answer to her estranged husband Jim's Confession —remember, our twelve hundred "whispering, masculine kind of love" jokes?—comes out May 1st. How convenient, then, that the Post is reporting today about Jim's ramped-up custody demands and accusations of homophobia! Jim also doesn't want Dina using their daughter Jacqueline as a prop on her book tour: in a motion he filed, he takes issue with Jacqueline's visits to the set of GMA and to Kelly Ripa's dressing room. He also "groused about artwork in their home, demanding that one nude photograph be removed." Um, do he and Dina have some sort of nefarious deal in place? Something along the lines of "you stand there looking supportive while I come out of the closet, and in a while I'll help you sell your book."
McG Rips Wife's Gay 'Fear' [NYP]
Doing their utmost, as usual, to defy the stereotype that book publishing types are cape-wearing drama nerds, Galleycat solicited Ben Greenman-style show-tune parodies of works of literature. Today, the results are in, and while some of them are as sad and clunky as the filler numbers in Dreamgirls, there are some high points. We especially liked this Cole Porter by way of One Minute Book Reviewer Janice Harayda take on our favorite Gay American:
It's been two years since the collapse of Dina McGreevey's "brokeback marriage" to Gay American and then-NJ Governor Jim McGreevey and one year (ish) since the publication of his softcore tell-all, The Confession. In other words: it's payback time! Today, Hyperion books (which used to employ one of us) announced plans to publish Dina's take on things. Her memoir, which will hit a bookstore near you in Spring 07, is entitled Silent Partner.
That image to the right isn't a brilliant bit of photoshopping — it's the $25,000 (paid out of "gubernatorial transition funds") portrait of scandal-plagued former NJ governor Jim McGreevey that he commissioned — and then, after leaving office, sat for. "It represents a final obligation," said the noted Gay American yesterday at the portrait's unveiling, adding that it helped close a chapter of his life. We can only hope that that chapter will be detailed in a sequel to The Confession. We'd hope Jim would be able to work something about being "well-hung" in there somewhere.
On Larry King last night, ex- NJ governor Jim McGreevey's onetime aide and (according to McGreevey) partner in ecstatic man-love Golan Cipel again refuted claims that he'd been anything but a sexual harassee to McG. But he also leveled a shocking accusation: that "Gay American" McGreevey isn't even a homo (though he covered his bases by copping to notion that McGreevey might be "bi.")
Of the purported victim of Jim McGreevey's harassment, a tipster writes:
