The Republicans' bill to repeal the new health care law is literally called the "Repealing the Job-Killing Health Care Law Act." But Speaker John Boehner is hesitant to use "job-killing" after Tucson. He's considering other slightly less violent terms now.

MSNBC windbag Ed Schultz had lefty Rep. Dennis Kucinich on his show last night to yell about John Boehner. But Kucinich praised John Boehner for being "really statesmanlike" about the Arizona shooting aftermath. Schultz disagrees!

Where was Speaker John Boehner last night? He wasn't at the president's memorial service in Tucson. And breathless reports are claiming he wanted to hobnob at an RNC cocktail party instead. That monster! But maybe there's more to it.

Republican sex-fantasizer Andrea Peyser needs a stronger man than weepy Johnny Boehner: "Can you imagine Vladmir Putin of Russia, who rides bare-chested in boots aboard a horse through frigid Siberia, tapping wetly into his deepest fears?" Despotic fascism= sexxxy. [NYP]

On tonight's Late Show, David Letterman delivered a rare treat—the episode's "Top 10 List" was actually funny! The topic was "Little-Known Facts About John Boehner," though, so it was bound to be a stone groove smash hit wonder.

Going into today's congressional transfer of power, most observers expected that new Speaker John Boehner would have to wrest the leader's gavel from Nancy Pelosi's death grip. But she handed it over, after a pleasantly batty speech. Congratulations, John Boehner!

[It's a big Boehner day on Capitol Hill! Here's incoming Speaker John Boehner posing with ten of his eleven (less orange-skinned) siblings outside the House chamber today, before his swearing-in. Image via speakerboehner/Flickr]

The new Republican House majority will be sworn in tomorrow, the start of the 112th Congress. Have you bought a dress yet? You'll want to look good as you watch tomorrow's events on John Boehner's Facebook, from your cubicle.

House Republicans have set January 12 as the date for their first major legislative feat: repealing the new health care law. It will pass! And then Harry Reid won't bring it up for a Senate vote, the end.

The Weekly Standard's funnyman Bill Kristol has rewritten "'Twas the Night Before Christmas" and boy... it's a real knee-slapper! Here's a little tease: "By then we'll have entered the era of Boehner: Our pocketbooks fuller, our politics saner." Yup.

If you haven't seen frequent crier John Boehner's hilarious waterworks performance from last night's 60 Minutes yet, you haven't lived. All Lesley Stahl had to do was mention "opportunity" or "achievement" and voila: Explosive tears, from the incoming House Speaker.

Incoming House Speaker John Boehner isn't happy with House Democrats' tricky plan to force a vote — expected this afternoon — on extending middle-class tax cuts only. You can tell he's mad when he starts calling things "chickencrap."

Incoming Speaker of the House John Boehner just announced a new ladies room in the House chamber that will be as conveniently located as the men's room. Boehner's also announcing a special closet where male legislators can go and weep.

Reps. John Boehner and Eric Cantor, the two leading House Republicans, have issued a warning to the Smithsonian's National Portrait Gallery: Take down that exhibit where Jesus is covered with ants, or face "tough scrutiny" next year. [Update below]

Shortly after the election, incoming House Speaker John Boehner burnished his common-man cred by pledging to fly commercial, instead of using the private military plane afforded him. Nice. But he'll still be able to bypass the TSA's molestation routine.

Democracy is like a pungent onion for weepy Republican Speaker-of-the-House-to-be (ugh) John Boehner. Remember that time he broke down about the health care bill? Nancy Pelosi thinks John Boehner is an immature crybaby.

Many newly elected Republican members of Congress explicitly refused to raise the federal debt ceiling during their campaigns. Problem is, the federal debt ceiling kinda needs to be raised, soon! Can John Boehner get these kids to do it?

South Dakota Congresswoman-elect Kristi Noem narrowly won the election season's "hottest race" — the one with two under-40 female candidates — last week. And now her drooling male colleagues in Washington may give her a spot in the leadership!

Republican House minority leader John Boehner has been using a dumb—trust me, really dumb—line involving Johnny Cash in some recent speeches. Cash's daughter Roseanne doesn't think much of that. And she let Boehner know, by calling him "asshat."

The National Republican Club of Capitol Hill, a.k.a. the Capitol Hill Club, is an exclusive city club designed to meet the scotch, steak, and cigar needs of Republican congressmen. Shockingly, a black former employee claims that it's run by racists.