A moment of pity for professional blowhard John C. Dvorak. The guy had built an enviable career out of baiting Apple evangelists. Now that Apple pisses off its own customers, Dvorak needs to look elsewhere for someone to offend. His first target: The Obamatards who pack the Bay Area, stumping for Barack as fervently as they once did for Steve Jobs. By loosely comparing Obama's Berlin campaign event to Hitler's Nuremberg Rallies, Dvorak has proven it possible to break Godwin's Law, the no-Hitler rule of the Internet. Check out this audio clip from a podcast with Adam Curry [MP3]. Dvorak breaks through the Hitler barrier and keeps on going as bravely as Chuck Yeager cracking the speed of sound. It's impressive, but only until you realize a thousand talk radio hosts have been doing it all day for years. (Photo by AP/Jens Meyer)

Why has professional tech curmudgeon John C. Dvorak changed his initial opinion of Joost, the Internet television service? Why, because it now contains his own content. In his January review of Joost, Dvorak summed up the offering in "two words: it stinks." Dvorak complained about Joost's tracking of user habits for advertising purposes and background interruptions from the application. But he reserved his largest complaint for the content offerings: "The only content is infomercials for last-gen rock bands with emphasis on Green Day and its Hitler Youth-style concerts." Dvorak warned that if Joost didn't focus on content, it would soon "be a memory." Now that Dvorak's CrankyGeeks has its own Joost channel, we're sure the hard-to-please reviewer loves the smell of Joost's stinky content. Sniffing your own armpits again, eh, John?

TIM FAULKNER — John C. Dvorak has been named VP & Managing Editor of PodShow TECH, the technology channel of the podcasting network created by Adam Curry and Ron Bloom. The curmudgeonly and possibly eternal techno-journalist also will host his own podcast dubbed Tech5.

Dan Fost at the San Francisco Chronicle at last discovers the provenance of this legendary pic of Federated Media's John Battelle. Turns out that the photo originally emanated — like so much in tech news — from the machinations of John Dvorak. It dates from Battelle's Industry Standard days, taken by Dvorak during one of Battelle's infamous "money-wasting Friday parties." Dvorak photoshopped the pic to look like black-and-white film, gave it the Register, and presto: net artifact for the ages.

NICK DOUGLAS — While dust gathers on our old VHS copies of Pirates of Silicon Valley (for us, Noah Wyle's career hit its high point with his role as Steve Jobs), it's time to cast the sequel. Starring the Daily Show's Demetri Martin as Digg founder Kevin Rose, Jason Bateman as Diggnation co-host Alex Albrecht and Rush Limbaugh as John C. Dvorak, the show also includes stars playing Bill Gates, Rupert Murdoch, Merlin Mann, and Google's Marissa Mayer.

Gottfried the Intern wraps up another episode of Leo Laporte's online talk show, This Week in Tech.

• Tech reporter John C. Dvorak says hacker Kevin Mitnick should become chairman of Hewlett-Packard. Har har. That's the tech equivalent of "Christopher Walken for President." [Dvorak Uncensored]

PC Magazine columnist John C. Dvorak follows up the "How I bait Mac users" video (which whipped bloggers into a frenzy) with an "I'm sorry, I'm flabbergasted" column. Now Dvorak says that his baiting trick only worked three times in his career — and that he's amazed how many people blew up at this video.

Some people can't let up on AOL exec Jason Calacanis. Readers are begging for a mention of the Weblogs, Inc. founder's appearance on major podcast This Week in Tech. (One TWiT commenter wrote, "Keep that flaming drama queen off your show.") So here, instead of wasting over an hour listening, read these hastily scribbled Valleywag show notes. (If you really must hear, here's the mp3.

PC Magazine columnist and veteran tech pundit John C Dvorak explains his Mac-fan baiting method in this video by Dave Winer. The best part isn't Dvorak admitting that he writes like a weasel (duh), nor that he's saying all this in the San Fran Apple store. It's cameraman Dave Winer asking "what the point" is.

I originally read the title of this romance novel mockup, featuring landmark tech journalist John C. Dvorak, as "Spanky Geeks." Just sayin'.

As the Register's Andrew Orlowski flies back to England, it's time to check up on the other trolls of tech — the real journalists, fake journalists, and — ugh — bloggers.

Hacks and flacks wished Andrew Orlowski (pictured, the one with his hair on top) farewell last night with a calm happy hour at the Edinburgh Castle Pub. His exit dilutes the pool of Valley journalism, as the Register reporter was a long-time snarker and Google hound (one confident enough to snub Google Press Day). Now, after five years in the Valley, he's headed back to England.

Great weekend ahead, and I'm not just saying that 'cause Valleywag takes a half-day tomorrow. Here — meet someone important by Memorial Day and pump 'em for info.

Another Gillmor Gang podcast, another hour and a half of white guys saying "um." If your ears aren't bleeding within five minutes, you'll at least want to walk in and SHAKE these guys when they get distracted and start talking about Darwinism. Blogger (and Tinfinger CEO) Paul Montgomery says just what we're all thinking: cut it down! And Steve, shut up!