Justin Bieber, the heir to Justin Timberlake's perennial sad ex-boyfriend throne, stepped out in Canada this week to accept a Diamond Jubilee Medal from Canada's Prime Minister, Stephen Harper.
Justin Bieber is in a cranky mood these days, which means he's either teething or ruing the day that his mother ever pushed him into a life of public scrutiny and emotional dwarfism. On Sunday's American Music Awards, he dedicated one award to his haters and, during his Artist of the Year (ha, Artist of the Year, can you imagine?) acceptance speech, he moaned, "It's hard growing up with everything going on, with everyone watching me."
Breaking news on the Gomez-Bieber front: last night, Selena Gomez and Justin Bieber had dinner together at a Japanese restaurant in Los Angeles. Unfortunately, according to TMZ's highly-trained fleet of spies, the date did not go well, as Gomez allegedly ditched the date after less than 10 minutes. Our own spies in L.A. (just trust me), overheard the entire conversation:
As the Elmo Sex Scandal — one of the top two current Sex Scandals in the United States — draws to an anticlimactic close, parents across the country have been left wondering: how can I explain to my children that Kevin Clash, the puppeteer who provides Elmo with life has been accused of having sex with a 16-year-old, and furthermore that the man in question (now 23) recanted his story within days of the initial accusation?
Brunching with your best friends is supposed to be the best part of your sad and hopeless existence, but sometimes, doing Sunday brunch is hard work. You will surely have to wait in a very long line. After finally getting seated, you will be given terrible service because the restaurant is just way too busy. These two things make the meal very long and you might run out of things to talk about very quickly. Use this cheat sheet and your friends might start calling you queen bloody mary.
The video above will be the new "What is the Internet, anyway?" in 20 years, when we look back on the "cyberbullying" frenzy through the lens of the stilted discourse that defined it. In it, Justin Bieber dons his smart-guy glasses, flatly delivers a plea to use the Internet to make "a positive impact on the world," and counsels a victim of cyberbullying, who doesn't really articulate her story well. She references an AIM conversation that caused people to IM her hate messages, but she doesn't explain what the contents were that made people so angry. I'm not saying she brought the hate on herself, I'm just saying she's rocking bitchy bangs. #nocybo.
Oh, dear: it looks like vomiting Canadian pop star Justin Bieber had some "personal footage" stolen by unknown thieves. What kind of footage would that be, hmm?
In just a few short years we've been able to watch little Justin Bieber grow from boy to man to ... Phish head? It seems on his current tour, the Canadian wünderkind has been playing parts of three different Phish songs: "Sand," "First Tube" and "Divided Sky."
During a show in Glendale, Arizona last night, Justin Bieber walked on stage, "sang" and danced for a second, then turned his back to the crowd and puked everywhere. To his credit, Bieber handled it pretty well:
Snarling manchild who was raised without rules and should never be allowed to own a gun Justin Bieber let everyone on the Internet know how hard he is yesterday by posing with a fake gun in some pictures uploaded to Twitter.
