Former Real Housewife of New York Kelly Killoren Bensimon is off to get herself a degree from business school. The New York Post reports Bensimon will be taking classes online to get an MBA in business and finance at Northeastern University in Boston.

Ashton and Demi face divorce and cheating rumors, while their "other woman" prepares for a payday. Jessica Simpson takes 10 pregnancy tests and considers postponing her wedding. Holly Madison insures her boobs for $1 million. Thursday gossip surveys the wreckage.

We've been hearing whispers for the better part of a week that Kelly Bensimon, Alex McCord, and former Gawker intern Jill Zarin have been fired from the Real Housewives of New York and now it seems like it is official. Goodbye, sweet, sweet ladies.

Not happy with all the eardrum damage caused by her first aural abomination, Countess LuAnn de Lesseps is back with a new song and a new video, this time co-starring some other Real Housewives of New York. Know what? It's not completely horrible!

Blake Lively faces the hydra monster of naked scandals. Arnold Schwarzenegger is ready for divorce. Natalie Portman stands up Oprah. Ellen Barkin's live-in boyfriend is half her age. The only way to kill Thursday gossip is with fire.

Neither Father Dowling, Matlock, Jessica Fletcher, or any other geriatric detective could figure out just who died last night on the Real Montauk Monsters of New York. Was it Sonja who got thrown from a horse? Was it Ramona who committed social suicide? Was it Kelly who buried her head in the sand and suffocated? Who knows?

Last night the concert for the world's worst David Bowie cover band, Real Housewives of Suffragette City, did their horrendous rendition of "Fashion" (Turn to the left!) with a runway show and photo shoot. The Goon Squat has officially come to town. Beep beep!

[Real Housewife of New York Kelly Bensimon in New York yesterday. Photo via Bauer-Griffin]

[Real Housewife of New York Kelly Bensimon vacationing in Miami. Photo via Bauer-Griffin]

Celebrities: They bring their significant others to awkward family Thanksgiving dinners just like us! Taylor Swift and Jake Gyllenhaal sipped lattes; Kim Kardashian brought home Halle Berry's ex; Lindsay Lohan saw an old flame. Saturday's Gossip Roundup is eating leftovers.

Being something of an expert in the business, Lindsay Lohan's mom thinks she should open a chain of rehab centers. Also today: Kelly Bensimon can't stop embarrassing her kids, Joe Francis happily civilizes his union, and some Twilight news.

Gisele singlehandedly keeps a party alive by whispering sweet nothings. Britney's conservatorship is phasing out. Kelly Osbourne sees herself in a bikini and cries. John Oliver gets engaged. Monday gossip is impervious to seduction.

Paris Hilton's mug shot looks better than most people's regular photos. Will Spencer Pratt cough up his sex tape? All of Jersey Shore sued for assault. Leonardo DiCaprio gets a restraining order. That is not Sunday Gossip Roundup's purse.

[Kelly Killoren Bensimon is petrified during a commercial shoot in the East Village yesterday when she thinks she hears the monster Frankel-stein approaching. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Someone forgot to wind the Kelly Killoren Bensimon robot yesterday and it could no longer run in the middle of the road. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Real Housewife of New York City Jessie Jellybeans Kelly Bensimon takes one of her patented street-jogs with an unidentified individual; image via Bauer-Griffin]

It's finally over! The last episode of the Real Housewives of NYC blitz brought us some golden "lost footage." Here, watch Sonja reveal the deep, dark secrets of liposuction to Kelly, all while debating the true merits of cougardom.

Hear ye, hear ye. This session of Real Housewives of New York Court of the State of Bravo is about to begin. We will hear testimony and sentence the guilty accordingly. The Honorable Andrew M. "Andy" Cohen is presiding.

Tonight was Part II of the Real Housewives of NY Reunion Trilogy and, like its Godfather counterpart, it was just as good as Part I. The best part? Kelly Bensimon's completely insane explanation of her completely insane breakdown/self. Videos inside.

The claws were out and in full force on last night's Real Housewives of NYC reunion, and Kelly brought her usual dose of complete crazy. Watch her and Alex McCord duke it out inside.