As a parked RV full of vigil-standing Defamer commenters idles outside of the Glendale City Jail, Kiefer Sutherland sits in his solitary cell just a few hundred feet away, beginning Day 3 of what will eventually be 48 days in the correctional facility. His only crimes? An illegal U-turn and perhaps loving life too much. Still, a repentant and cooperative actor appears to have accepted his fate, with one jail spokesman going so far as to describe him as a "model prisoner":

We're one step closer to the end of the waking nightmare represented by Kiefer Sutherland's ongoing DUI case, as his Hollywood superlawyer has entered a no contest plea on the actor's behalf. Now we have to wait until December 21st for the sentencing, hoping that he receives the wrist-slap that will allow him to get back to the important business of being The World's Drinking Buddy™ as quickly as possible. [TMZ]

When Kiefer Sutherland wandered out of his East Side comfort zone—where drunken U-turns aren't just legal, they're encouraged!—and into the glare of a West L.A. cop car's spotlight, few of us immediately realized that the ensuing arrest constituted a probation violation for the beloved, tannenbaum-tackling lush-of-the-people. Now, with the actor facing possible jail time and all the ominous God-finding that implies, we offer a Kiefer post-DUI round-up: