The late Kim Jong-il's oldest son, the Ferragamo-wearing Chad Kim Jong-nam, lost out on a power struggle with his youngest brother, Kim Jong-un, years ago, and has since spent most of his time in Macau and China, doing whatever it is international playboy dictator relatives do. (Eat, apparently.) Not that he's jealous, or anything — no, he just likes to tell Japanese reporters that his younger brother is going to fail for completely different reasons.

Kim Jong-il's loafer-loving son Kim Jong-nam, speaking with Japanese reporters, said his father never wanted to hand power over to one of his sons but did so in order to "stabilize the framework of the nation." Yeah, that makes sense.

North Korea's Dear Leader Kim Jong-il promoted both his sister, Kim Kyong-hui, and his youngest son, Kim Jon-un to four start generals in a move that experts say is a precursor to the younger Kim taking control of the country.

Ambushed in Macau by a South Korean newspaper, Kim Jong-nam, oldest son of Kim Jong-il, when asked about the sinking of the warship Cheonan said, "I do not know. Please stop." He said his father is "doing well." [JoongAng Daily]

Someday, one of whacked-out demon leader Kim Jong Il's sons is going to inherit the porcelain throne that is North Korea's government. What makes the spawn of a psychotic despot tick?