Portlandia is back for its fifth season which means more Jeff Goldblum!!!! And a laundry list of other celebrity cameos, based on a new trailer released today.

New York's Scotland-themed "Dressed to Kilt" fashion show is our annual reminder that male celebrities have bodies significantly worse than their female peers. Whereas lady catwalkers are bronzed, buffed, and waxed, these men are a parade of pasty chicken-legs.

The 2009 Mercedes-Benz Polo Challenge held its inaugural match at the Bridgehampton Polo Club on Saturday. Polo heartthrob Nacho Figueras, Chace Crawford, chef Marcus Samuelsson, Kyle MacLachlan and Desiree Gruber, Star Jones and boyfriend Herb Wilson, and a handful of reality TV personalities (Jill Zarin, PC Peterson, Kourtney Kardashian) turned out for the action. Cityfile's roving correspondent Douglas Marshall took a few minutes to catch up with Beth Ostrosky, who turned 37 last week but gets a gold star for still fitting into her short shorts from high school.

Filmmaker and Transcendental Meditation enthusiast David Lynch brought Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr together for the first time in years as part of the Change Begins Within benefit at Radio City Music Hall on Saturday night. A slew of celebrity performers and guests were on hand for the occasion, including Sheryl Crow, Laura Dern, and Ben Harper (with Ringo, left), as well as Jerry Seinfeld, Yoko Ono, John McEnroe, Martin Scorsese, Howard Stern and Beth Ostrosky, Matthew Broderick, Moby, Jennifer Aniston, Desiree Gruber and Kyle MacLachlan, Isabella Rossellini, David Arquette, Michael J. Fox, Robin Quivers, Eddie Vedder, Jason Bateman, Barbara Bach, Bettye LaVette, and Mike Love. [Wireimage, Getty, VF, NYO]

Chelsea's Lehmann Maupin Gallery played host to Glamour's "Glamour Project" last night, an art exhibit designed to celebrate the magazine's 70th anniversary. Glamour editor Cindi Leive and publisher Bill Wackermann welcomed the likes of Cynthia Rowley and Bill Powers (left), Iman, Lyor Cohen and Tory Burch, Kyle MacLachlan and Desiree Gruber, Yvonne Force Villareal, Thelma Golden, Nicole Miller, Thakoon Panichgul, Gilles Bensimon, Marcus Samuelsson, Alanna Heiss, Jeanne Greenberg Rohatyn, Evelyn Lauder, Rory Tahari, Diane Kruger, Amanda Peet, Olivia Chantecaille, Roopal Patel, Jane Lauder, Peter Som, Erin Fetherston and Hedi Ferjani, Gilles Mendel, Michael Stipe, Oscar Blandi, Lisa Airan, Charlotte Sarkozy, Alison Brod, Lela Rose, Patrick McMullan, Kai Kuhne, Waris Ahluwalia, Amy Fine Collins, and Jason Wu, who admired works by Kara Walker, Rachel Feinstein, and Marilyn Minter (among others), pieces that will be featured in the magazine's April issue. [PMc, VF, FWD, GOAG]

Ivana Trump turns 60 today. Anderson Cooper's mother, heiress Gloria Vanderbilt, is 85. Cindy Crawford is 43. Sidney Poitier turns 82. Coach president Reed Krakoff is 45. Grace Hightower De Niro is turning 56. Knicks guard Stephon Marbury is 32. Patty Hearst is turning 55. Architect Deborah Berke is turning 55. Charles Barkley is 46. Senator Mitch McConnell is turning 67. Actress Lauren Ambrose is 31. And poor Rihanna turns 21 today. Weekend birthdays after the jump!

♦ Present at Bette Midler's Hulaween benefit gala for the New York Restoration project: Suze Orman (dressed as big pile of money, left), André Leon Talley, Gloria Estefan, Gloria Gaynor, Donna Karan, Kathy Griffin, Michael Kors, Pink, Jimmy Buffett, John McEnroe and Patty Smyth, Ray Kelly, and Cindy Adams. [PMc, Wireimage, NYO]

• Kyle MacLachlan and Desiree Gruber are officially parents. The Desperate Housewives actor and Project Runway executive producer had a son named Callum Lyon MacLachlan on Friday. [Us]

1) Rory and Elie Tahari hosted a bash at their beachfront house for God's Love We Deliver: 400 guests including Simon Doonan (above center) and Jonathan Adler, Martha Stewart, Arnold Scaasi, Kelly Klein, Debbie Bancroft, Richard Mishaan, Tory Burch, Kyle MacLachlan (above left) and Desiree Gruber (above right), Olivia Chantecaille, Dennis Basso, Melissa Berkelhammer, Gigi Mortimer, Karen Pearl, and Tiffany Dubin raised $1.3 million by bidding on auction prizes including lunch with Blaine Trump and Joan Rivers at Le Cirque. [Hamptons.com/Dan's Hamptons]

Once-foxy actor Kyle MacLachlan, depending on who you're talking to, is best known either for his affiliation with David Lynch or for playing the perfect WASP husband on shows like Sex and the City and Desperate Housewives.

The press release for the opening of AGO at the Shore Club in Miami, hosted by Robert De Niro, chef Agostino Sciandri, and Ian Schrager hotels, has a short list of "celebrities" scheduled to make an appearance. The list includes Desiree Gruber, the publicist for Ian Schrager. I was under the impression that the only way a flak could get to be a celebrity was by backing over half a dozen people with her SUV at a Hamptons nightclub, but I guess putting your name on your client's "celebrity" list works too. Then again, maybe it's just a coincidence. The PR firm, Harrison & Shriftman, did spell her husband's name wrong. It's actor "Kyle MacLachlan", not "Kyle McLaughlin."