Longtime Gawker readers may recall a bygone era in which Laurel Touby, founder of media job board-etc. site Mediabistro, was a regular Gawker "character," famous for her feather boas and inability to use email properly. After she sold Mediabistro for $23 million in 2007, she became more famous for being a Can You Believe The Lady Who Started Mediabistro Is Now Super Rich, What The Fuck Is This World Coming To? Well. Years have passed. Now you must hear all about Laurel Touby's multimillion-dollar apartment.

Amanda Ernst, the new editor of Mediabistro's Fishbowl NY, was on the Today Show this morning! Topic: How to deal with her crushing poverty as she tries to survive on a paltry Mediabistro wage.

In your conspiratorial Thursday media column: The New Yorker hates Brazil, Laurel Touby bids you farewell, Pinch Sulzberger ups his humor quotient, and sexism exists.

Laurel Touby found out just how tough her underlings have had it; David Lynch said something appropriately cryptic and JDate tested a cranky, fasting Jew's patience. The Twitterati got deeper into their grooves.

Millionairess Mediabistro founder Laurel Touby and her husband, Businessweek media columnist Jon Fine, are taking months-long sabbaticals to "do some ambitious traveling." We'd do the exact same thing if we had that money. Jerks. [The Wrap. Pic: MB]

• Coldplay bassist Guy Berryman has paid $2.65 million for a 2,681-square-foot apartment on the second floor of 79 East 2nd Street. The best part: He'll be a ten minute walk from bandmate Jonny Buckland, who picked up an Astor Place condo last November. [Cityfile]
• Artist Richard Prince has paid $11.5 million for a townhouse located at 57 East 78th Street. The six-bedroom manse had been listed for $15 million earlier this year. [NYO]
• Mediabistro founder Laurel Touby has paid $3.905 million for a 4,100-square-foot penthouse at 43 East 19th Street. [NYO]

Back when boa-wearing email terrorist Laurel Touby pocketed millions on the sale of Mediabistro, she said she wanted a car, a driver and a new apartment, but could only afford two of the three. Now she just needs the car.

In your early Friday media column: Laurel Touby is officially chillin like a villain, the Boston Globe gets another contract vote, Nikki Finke is mysterious, and CNN's creative accounting of what it means to be "number one."

The problem with Twitterati isn't so much oversharing as undercaring. Laurel Touby's apartment woes, Lockhart Steele's porn name, and Penelope Trunk's divorce bill are as good as the media elite's tweets get!

Barbara Walters sending Twitter messages as she gets her hair shampooed is a sign of the Apocalypse. Run for the hills, kids — but make sure to get a frosty caffeinated beverage before you do!

Failed Internet mogul Alan Meckler is really excited about the Semantic Web, aka Web 3.0! And who can blame him, since he pretty much failed at versions 1.0 and 2.0? Meckler, who has run a passel of third-rate Internet websites since the early '90s, when he was best-known for trade titles like CD-ROM Librarian, now calls his company WebMediaBrands. Laurel Touby's Mediabistro.com is part of his collection. The boa-bedecked editrix reports breathlessly on Twitter that her boss has called the Semantic Web "the next stage of the Internet."

Jamie Dimon (left) is the CEO of JPMorgan. Byrdie Bell (right) goes to a lot of parties. What do the two have in common? Absolutely nothing, except they're both celebrating birthdays today: Dimon is 53; Bell is turning 24. William H. Macy turns 59 today. Kathy Hilton, the woman who brought Paris Hilton into this world, is 50. Emile Hirsch is 24. Mets pitcher Johan Santana is turning 30. Political commentator Charles Krauthammer is 59. Mediabistro founder Laurel Touby is turning 46. Common is 37. Danny Masterson is 33. Dana Delany is 53. And Neil Sedaka is turning 70. Weekend birthdays after the jump!

As we learned that her assistant was laid off today, our attentions were drawn to be-boa-ed Mediabistro founder Laurel Touby. Coincidentally, a tipster directed us to some nostalgic photos from her young, frivolous college years.

We hear that JupiterMediaWebMediaBrands, the company that bought Mediabistro for $23 million in 2007, has laid off 60(?) people [UPDATED below]. Most were tech workers and various parent company staffers. The lone Mediabistro casualty:

In your risible Thursday media column: a new New Yorker publisher, Time Out NY cuts pay (with a pizza party!), Laurel Touby Twitters, and more:

It used to be that private planes inspired hatred simply because their occupants were probably over-wealthy environmental hypocrites. But thanks to the recession, private jets are an even more radioactive populist issue. Fly and die!

Mediabistro has a disturbing tradition of "Merry Christmas" video-postcards. This year, Laurel plays Santa and if you have the stomach, watch the whole thing here. As our Christmas gift, we've got an almost-bearable 15-second clip.

We gratuitously mocked Times columnist Nick Kristof's Twitter feed last week. But the truth is that he's in good company. Lots of big-shot media people—including many Gawker "favorites"!—have Twitters, despite the fact that Twitter is proven to destroy journalism. We haven't been paying enough attention to their various tweets about this and that. After the jump, we condense the offering of five famous media twits into bite-sized packages:

You all know the tale: MediaBistro started as a series of cocktail networking parties hosted by Laurel Touby, who then realized she could monetize a website by charging (voluntarily, at first) for job postings. Then came the classes, which are totally overpriced—especially when compared with nearly identical, yet much longer, journalism classes at the New School. (I've taken both!) Then came the seminars—would you pay $75 to watch dubious dating columnist Julia Allison and others talk about personal branding? MediaBistro makes money by getting people to pay them to learn how to break into journalism. But let's be honest: they're basically an expensive Learning Annex for people who want to work in the media but have no contacts or connections. So what's MediaBistro gonna do to make money turning the downturn, with MediaJobs disappearing left and right? How about desperate stunts: charging for cheesecake videos that cross the line:This video, "How Do I Got from Model to Model Journalist?" costs $15 FOR A SIXTEEN-MINUTES. Laurel, that's the phone-sex model of making money, not the "freelancer-helping" one.

Laurel Touby, the millionaire founder of Mediabistro—which totally exists to give freelancers the false hope of getting media jobs—has been called upon to give a speech about "Best Practices in Freelancing." Except she's forgotten everything about freelancing, because she's a millionaire now! So she needs you freelancers to help: