That Cirque Lodge in Utah sure sounds like one helluva wonder drug. After spending several weeks there attending to what TMZ claimed was a"substance abuse" problem, Eva checked out on February 7th (the same day Kiki Dunst checked in!), but was recently seen joyriding through the weekend party circuit. (Lest you forget, Ms. Mendes was once a Campari model.) But Eva's not the only Cirque alum who hasn't quite kicked whatever habit they went in there with; illustrious fellow Cirque-ers include David Hasselhoff, Mary-Kate Olsen, Richie Sambora and our favorite topless "art" model, Lindsay Lohan. So how well did each of these stellar examples of tip top health fare after leaving the Lodge, sober certificate in hand? From hamburgers to hoovering powder on the beach, the verdict is in.

Branding experts know that getting the right celebrity to wear a client's clothes at the right time can be worth millions in free publicity. Emphasis on the right celebrity and the right time. An example of the wrong celebrity at the wrong time would be Mary-Kate Olsen, and right now.

· La Vie en Rose Oscar nominee Marion Cotillard tries to parlay some of her awards-season heat into a role alongside Christian Bale and Johnny Depp in Michael Mann's Public Enemies, playing gangster John Dillinger's "torch singer girlfriend." [Variety]
· Meanwhile, (rightly) Academy-ignored Charlie Wilson's War star Julia Roberts hunts for her next chance at awards glory, attaching herself to star in and produce an adaptation of soon-to-be published novel Hothouse Flowers, about a recently divorced NY ad exec who throws it all away to embark on a fabulous post-break-up adventure. [THR]
[After the jump: NBC sues Dick Wolf!; Oscar nominations translate to bigger weekend grosses; the fate of Mary-Kate and Ben Kingsley's Sundance film.]

The New York Post claimed yesterday that police were looking to interview Mary-Kate Olsen about the death of her friend, Australian actor Heath Ledger. Police spokespeople and the tabloid's competitors, including Gawker, may have been too quick to rubbish the line of inquiry. Today, The Post ups the pressure with a set of questions unanswered the hard-partying actress: "Why did she send her bodyguards to the scene? Why didn't she tell the masseuse who found Ledger's body to call 911? Why did she think her security guards could help in a medical emergency?" But there's more: an eyewitness account to be published in tomorrow's Sunday Telegraph, in Australia, claims Mary-Kate Olsen's bodyguards entered Heath Ledger's building three minutes before the arrival of paramedics at 3.33pm, not simultaneously, as previously reported. Which begs another question. The police discovered a wide array of prescription drugs in the Brokeback star's apartment, but no illegal substances. Would Olsen's bodyguards have had time, or instructions, to remove any embarrassing evidence? (TMZ.com sources still maintain police were present at all times one of Olsen's bodyguards was present. Hunh?)

People Magazine has confirmed our Gawker Stalker reports: Mary-Kate Olsen was indeed partying on the Lower East Side on Thursday night, The former child star was a friend of Heath Ledger, and the first person called after the actor's body was found dead. But the diminutive star was not so devastated by his death to alter her social schedule. [Photo from Splash.]

· Wait a minute: Did Ryan Seacrest think he was giving Ellen a dildo in a fun little gift bag? Oh, that's just a bingo stamper, and not a Big Blue Violator? What a silly mix-up! An honest mistake, really.
· Mona Lisa with a shoulder-mounted rocket launcher would've made a much better Rambo poster.
· Mary-Kate Olsen's thought process upon receiving that fateful call from the masseuse, in flowchart form.
· "Those pigs were about 400 pounds each, and there were four of them. I was tied pretty tight into that pigpen by my neck and my hands, and my mouth was gagged. At one point while we were filming one of the pigs broke through the fence and actually came right at me. I was freaking out, and they were rushing in to try to get me out, and of course Sly is in the background yelling, 'Keep the cameras rolling!'"

"Heath was a friend. His death is a tragic loss. My thoughts are with his family during this very difficult time." [ET]

This morning in official denials of inaccurate reports emerging in the wake of Heath Ledger's untimely death: "Absolutely at no time are we going to be interviewing her. We never had any plans to interview her. At this point we are just waiting for the Medical Examiner's report," says the NYPD in response to a story that they intended to lock Mary-Kate Olsen in an interrogation room lit only by a single, flickering lightbulb until she revealed all the secrets of her phone calls with the 911-bypassing masseuse who discovered the actor's body. "[A] complete crock of s[hit]," hisses the oft-embattled publicist for Mel Gibson, annoyed about an item spuriously claiming that Gibson is anti-gay-cowboy, and "turned cold" towards Ledger for ignoring his allegedly terrible career advice about turning down Brokeback Mountain. [People, Rush & Molloy]

Is Mary-Kate Olsen a murderess or is she just really good about picking up her cell phone when it rings four times in a row? Contrary to the New York Post's front page today, cops say they have "absolutely no interest" in talking to Olsen about her role in the events the day of actor Heath Ledger's death. The Post's funny print format that can't be fixed on the fly will look silly all day, but the least they could do is update their website, which is still running with a big Olsen-interrogation splash. Of course, they're not the only ones.

Does merely knowing the same masseuse mean you're dating? That's what breathless stories in both the New York Post and Us Weekly are claiming. The Post is reporting that Heath Ledger's masseuse, Diane Lee Wolozin, made her first phone call to Mary-Kate Olsen immediately after discovering Ledger's lifeless body at 2:45pm on Tuesday (fifteen minutes before her scheduled appointment with him). Wolozin, a possible felon, allegedly told NY police that the two had a "mutual relationship," and that she'd called Olsen using Ledger's phone, where it was programmed in. Added to erroneous early reports that Olsen owned the apartment where Ledger was found and more recently, news that Olsen's bodyguard called the two "an item," we're starting to wonder if all this hubbub is a whole lot of sound and fury, without any real substance.

What did the Mary-Kate Olsen's official blog have to say one day after the actress received the first call that Heath Ledger was dying in New York?

According to reports published earlier today by WCBS-TV reporter Scott Weinberger, the body of Heath Ledger was discovered yesterday with "a rolled up $20 bill with narcotic residue on it" and "several drug packets containing an unknown substance" lying nearby him. Too bad it turns out that not a stitch of that actually ended up being true. At least not according to the NYPD and Entertainment "ALL QUOTES MUST CREDIT ENTERTAINMENT TONIGHT!" Tonight. Also of note: the first phone call that massage therapist Diana Wolozin made after discovering Heath Ledger's unconscious body was not to 911 or even to 411, but to Mary Kate Olsen. [AP]

Police are now saying they suspect suicide in Heath Ledger's death today at a Manhattan apartment owned, says the Times, by actress Mary-Kate Olsen. Prescription pills were found around the actor's "naked and unconscious" body.

Weirdly some of the best blogging of the circus maximus that is Sundance is coming from the New York Times style blog The Moment. Kelly Will of Blonde Rules a Miami native is writing it. Last night, Will was a table with Paris Hilton. "Hilton, who is in town to promote "The Hottie and the Nottie," ate every single bit of her eggplant soup, lamb stew and chocolate cake created by champion Iron Chef, Cat Cora. And, for the record, Paris also requested spaghetti and tequila shots." But that wasn't the most distasteful part of Sundance, even a little bit!

[Mary Kate Olsen shielding herself from photographers in New York City, Jan 9; image via INF]

It's January in Hollywood, and that means it's time for Mr. Blackwell to once again push aside the heavy marble lid of his flawlessly appointed crypt in the ritzier district of the Hollywood Forever Retirement Community, and deliver the 48th edition of his Annual Worst-Dressed Women List. In a rare display of magnanimity which could indicate he might actually be softening in his third geologic era on Earth, Blackwell has left Britney Spears off completely, showing a Dr. Philian empathy for the singer at a time "when her personal life is in such upheaval." This year's results after the jump:

• Nailing the elusive 'stripper, Stevie Nicks, musical theater' trifecta, Drea "Adriana LaCerva" de Matteo and her boyfriend Shooter Jennings named their newborn daughter Alabama Gypsy Rose. [Us Weekly]
  

An Olsen twin is down! An Olsen is down! Thankfully, according to the rep for the Mary-Kate half (the one on Weeds, as you surely recall) of Hollywood's richest set of formerly conjoined twins, the just-announced hospitalization was for a "kidney infection," an explanation far less suspicious than the "exhaustion" and "dehydration" excuses forever tainted by flacks for the actress's more-troubled, serially rehabbing peers. [People]

• Remember back in 1999, when a pigtailed schoolgirl who danced provocatively but projected an essential girl-next-door wholesomeness burst onto the scene with a sugary, almost showtuneish ("still buh-LIEVE") pop song that sounded designed to appeal to little kids even while its lyrics demanded abuse? Well, Britney Spears actually lost her virginity at age 14, so that explains that dialectic. [Us Weekly]
  

"If you had told Mary-Kate Olsen on Saturday morning that her day was going to include taking in the recently revamped production of 'Rent' and wind up at London's famed seafood restaurant J. Sheekey for dinner with Kylie Minogue, her response would have been simple: 'I would have called you a liar,'" reports "writer" Derek Blasberg for Style.com. Us too. Kylie, WTF! [Photo: Derek Blasberg!]