When I was pregnant with my first child, I had a recurring dream. I was nursing a baby–in an icy parking lot, at a dinner party in the bedroom where the coats were piled on a bed, lost in the desert. I would nurse a baby at one breast, put her to the other, and there would be no milk. Sometimes the baby wailed with frustration and hunger, and sometimes the baby just looked at me with sad eyes. I always woke shaken. I must be worried, I thought, about being an adequate parent. But that wasn't it. My body was sending me a literal warning.

This afternoon a tipster forwarded us a Facebook post and link to a Google Doc, composed by a new mother, laying out some ground rules for the friends who will serve her.

America's ugly duckling, Jessica Plain and Tall, has finally given herself the gift of acceptance:

Jamie Lynne Grumet, whose left breast achieved stardom this week by appearing on the cover of Time while inside her nearly four-year-old son's mouth, went on the Today Show to discuss the controversial cover. With son Aram mewling by her side (wouldn't it be great if she'd whipped out a tit and shoved it in his mouth, right then and there?) Jamie explained that attachment parenting "is not for everybody," and that she isn't trying to judge anyone. She also notes that she's getting guff from breastfeeding critics and advocates:

Meet Aram Grumet. He is one month shy of four years old and he breast feeds. To illustrate a feature package on attachment parenting, Time had Aram stand on a chair and suck his mother's teat while gazing into the camera. The resulting photo will soon be on every newsstand in America.

Mayim Bialik, the once be-sunflowered jewel of the 90's, has joined the ranks of fellow whacky mothers Alicia Silverstone and January Jones. Bialik has penned a parenting book called, Beyond The Sling: A Real-Life Guide To Raising Confident, Loving Children The Attachment Parenting Way. The. Sling. Because it is about the joys of "attachment parenting" and breastfeeding your toddler.

Alicia Silverstone maintains a GOOP-like lifestyle website called The Kind Life, meant to promote "living your healthiest and happiest life to the fullest, while taking care of mama Earth at the same time!" Fantastic. Well today she posted the following treasure accompanied by the above video:

You know when a little kid sees a pregnant lady drinking a glass of OJ, and he's like "No! The baby will drown!" Turns out he's kind of right. The mother-to-be is drowning her baby in flavor, and it will impact the baby's palate forever, a new study finds. NPR reports:

An Australian mother is pitching a fit because her daughter won "Best Personality" at a children's beauty pageant, which is evidence of anti-meritocratic judgment, she says, because her daughter's personality sucks. The Herald-Sun reports,

Today's New York Times tells us that the trial of Casey Anthony, who's facing the death penalty for allegedly murdering her toddler Caylee, has become "this year's hot attraction" for tourists passing time in central Florida. Even Mickey Mouse has abandoned his gig to go watch the drama unfold.

A new study that examined how frequently women sought mental health care before and after childbirth and abortion indicates that having a baby may, in fact, be more traumatizing to women than having an abortion.

The young mothers of Capitol Hill have a fancy basement hideout called the "boob cube." Jealous?

Yikes. A 10-year-old girl in Jerez de la Frontera—a city in the Andalusia region of Spain—just gave birth, and authorities can't decide whether or not to let her family keep the baby.

A British woman named Shirley Wales gave birth to twins—one seemingly white, one seemingly black. Really, though, both are half-white and half-black. Which is a socially-constructed way of describing them anyway. Gee, race is complicated, isn't it?

The wife of Farooque Ahmed, the 34-year-old American citizen of Pakistani descent accused today of plotting to set off bombs on Washington, D.C., Metro trains, was involved in a decidedly non-jihadi-sounding social group called "Hip Muslim Moms."

A woman from Surprise, Arizona was "sick of her children" and asked police to take them so she could "have fun and play." Wish granted: Her children are in protective custody, and she is in jail. [AP, via, photo]

MTV will milk this Teen Mom gravy train for all its worth. And we will watch Every. Damn. Minute. The special mostly showed non-baby related issues like life-threatening illness, divorce, and baby-scares. Nothing ever goes right on this show.

It's Halloween season at the multi-plex; which means that if today's brand of torture-centric "thrills" is not your cup of tea, cinema offers few reasons not to stay in your house and barricade the doors.