As part of our ongoing coverage of Starbucks-related danger, we bring you the sad, sad tale of a tussle between one South Florida teen and his thirsty mom. O Starbucks, how your drinks are tearing this nation asunder!

This press release can't be real, can it? Now circulating on PRNewser, the Hairpin, and Mom-101: A PR email urging daughters to give their mothers moist vaginas for Mother's Day.

Indiana Rep. Mike Pence, who has an unusually devout following among conservatives, has announced he won't run for president. Thus concludes an afternoon of speculation that began with a call to his mother.

After 18 years of memorizing math equations while chained to a stake, Sophia Chua-Rubenfeld has escaped the basement cage where "superior Chinese mother" Amy Chua keeps her. Unfortunately, she has Stockholm syndrome. Either that, or her mom isn't that bad.

Amy Chua, author of the Wall Street Journal's much-maligned "Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior," did a Q&A about her heinous child-rearing techniques. She swears she isn't that monstrous. Watch the "tiger mother" do her best impression of a harmless kitten.

This weekend, I came across "Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior" by Amy Chua. Since I have a Chinese mother, I assembled my face into a self-righteous smirk and began to read. But—woe is me!—my Chinese mother's a fraud.

This morning, most people concluded that "Baby Yoga with Lena Fokina"—the latest addition to the strangely popular Russian swinging baby video genre—was fake. So what do we make of this video, featuring Lena and others swinging more babies?

Ted Williams is having the best week ever. The formerly homeless man has won the hearts of everyone...except his own mother? In this interview for the AP, Ms. Williams shares her oddly negative opinions on her son's viral success.

This week, we shed a tear for Audrina Patridge—twice. Once for being voted off DWTS, and again when someone filmed her mother's 5-minute long drunken rant in which she called Lauren Conrad a "pissy little fashion shit." Cringe.

Florida mother Alexandra Tobias has pleaded guilty to killing her infant son after shaking him for crying while she was playing FarmVille on Facebook. She shook him, "smoked a cigarette to compose herself," and then shook him again. Yeesh.

A Florida woman was arrested yesterday after a YouTube video surfaced showing her egging on her 16-year-old daughter during a brawl with another teenage girl. The video shows April Newcomb midway through the fight telling her daughter, "Don't fucking stop."

Dominique Cottrez of France has confessed to suffocating eight newborns and burying them in her backyard. The mother of two says she didn't want more children but didn't want to take the pill either.

A Utah woman is going to give birth to two children, possibly a week apart, because she has two buns growing in her separate ovens. Yes, Angie Cromar has two uteruses, and both of them are knocked up.

America's most unpopular national political figure Sarah Palin has it in her head that all "mothers" love her and agree with her stupid worldview of lies. This SarahPAC video goes out to them, the women who have spawned! [via]

Consider this a public service announcement. The least you could do is call the woman who is 50 per cent responsible for your existence and (probably) genuinely cares when she asks how you are.

While we weren't loving last night's uneven season finale of Weeds, we were loving Nancy Botwin's parenting skills—or lack thereof. Who wants to be raised by a boring stroller-pusher when you can have someone to bring the crazy?

Sexy-yet-crazed stabber Rahm Emanuel says he disappointed his mom by not becoming a dancer. But this behind-the-scenes photo, from the New York Times Magazine photo shoot, shows he's still trying to make his mama proud.