Ed Henry is still bitter about a college rejection letter; Jack Shafer might be an actual robot and Susan Orlean's laptop is l33t. The Twitterati revealed unexpected things about themselves.

New York has a fancy matrix graphic in which it pretends to identify which Twitterers are insipid or insightful. Oh, New York: Even Twitter's insights are insipid. Today's banalities:

Life in the media is rough. CNET's Natali Del Conte got stuck in the foot, while Fox's Nancy Loo suffered a wound in makeup. These and other reports of suffering from the twittering class:

Ryan Seacrest's executive producer feared seeming fey, CNET's Natali Del Conte feared losing marbles, and Bob Woodruff feared he wouldn't be popular on Twitter. And if you read Twitter all day, you'd be afraid too:

Dear Facebook employee: If you're going to do something obvious and cliché like wearing cowboy boots to SXSW's geek spring break, please have the decency not to tell Twitter about it. Other Twitter idiocies today:

The future's so bright for Twitterer Matt Cooper, he had to adjust his shades. Things looked darker for bullied gadget reviewer David Pogue, while CBS's Natali Del Conte got unwelcome stares at Starbucks. Today's tweets:

Two things apparently distract Jeremy Piven, according to CNET TV host & CBS correspondent Natali Del Conte who was on Fox's Red Eye last night: her breasts and Gawker.

Stewart Alsop, the goofy San Francisco-based venture capitalist, has this in common with Nouriel Roubini, the louche New York University professor known as "Dr. Doom" for his timely predictions of the current market collapse: Both are Facebook stalkers, aggressive in their requesting of friendship from attractive young women. But Alsop has one key difference: He's utterly shameless about it. Roubini was spurred into late-night Hitlerian name-calling by Gawker's reporting on his Facebook habits. We've sometimes felt the urge to hire a bodyguard for CNET video personality Natali Del Conte when she and Alsop attended the same party.But confronted by Mashable about his relationship collection, Alsop freely fessed up: "In his mid-50s, Alsop reaches out to young attractive women and asks if he can be their friend. Many say yes. Alsop says he's an old guy and it makes him feel as if he's got something going on. There's no downside for Alsop. Some may think it's weird, but it doesn't change anything for him." In case you had any doubts on how free-thinking the Bay Area is on such matters, Robin Wolaner, Alsop's "No. 1 girlfriend" and the CEO of social network TeeBeeDee, supports her man's Facebook habit. Even though, in the same Mashable article, she recommends against accepting friend requests from people you don't really know. Like, say, her 50something venture-capitalist boyfriend.

Mark Licea was the substitute host for CNET's Loaded pop-tech show this week, while regular emcee Natali Del Conte took a vacation. If you've watched Del Conte at all, here's what's creepy: Licea has her mannerisms down pat. In response to viewer feedback, the pair produced this mock training film. But, Mark, the real trick to Being Natali is to deliver lines like "Verizon and AT&T launch mobile social networks for suckers" as if you're announcing good news.

Jason Calacanis, the Mahalo CEO and email list administrator, and Michael Arrington, editor of TechCrunch and hero to hopeless website creators, held a meetup in Menlo Park last night for finalists in their TechCrunch50 startup beauty contest at the British Bankers Club. Our spy infiltrated the proceedings — and served Arrington a milkshake. "He didn't seem too happy about it," reports our informant. More photos from the event — including a surprise appearance from CNET TV star and former TechCrunch writer Natali Del Conte, who came after the proceedings were over for a brief tête-à-tête with Arrington.The crowd was small, our spy reports — "about 20-30 people, mostly TechCrunch50 finalists." SearchMe.com was one of the finalists — "some woman even Twittered that they got in." Arrington drives a gray Porsche, and "left with a ladyfriend, didn't get to see who." (Anyone know who he's dating? Do tell!) On to the pictures! Arrington, even as host, never could seem to crack a smile:

Look, I used to be a professional musician. And basically, most mashups, remixes, and other forms of Music 2.0 just don't work. All brain, no booty. But this remix of Bill O'Reilly's most awesomely human moment — "Fuck it! We'll do it live! Fucking thing sucks!" — blows Girl Talk off the turntable. Throw away your thinking caps and crank it to 11. Valleywag's contribution to the fad: We've successfully tainted Natali Del Conte with the line. it's so much cuter when she says it.

Never mind corporate meatballs like Neil Ashe and Quincy Smith — how's perky CNET correspondent Natali Del Conte faring in the wake of CBS Interactive's acquisition? Well! In an appearance on today's Early Show with Harry Smith, she sported a new 'do and explained the intricacies of different hands-free options for California drivers now banned from holding a cell phone to their ears. The best part is watching Smith stumble a bit trying to understand Bluetooth, pick himself back up by casually noting his experience as a helicopter passenger, then stumbling again over "those map things" before telling viewers to visit earlyshow.cbs.com — which is not a valid URL. Which makes us think that maybe Del Conte would make a better host than the guy who made his name doing standups for A&E Biography. Harry may be a perfect stand-in for the confused-old-man audience CBS currently has. But Natali represents the future audience CBS hoped it was buying.

A reader who watched a recent episode of Cranky Geeks thought the ring on Natali Del Conte's finger meant she got hitched. An instant message to the perky, petite host of CNET TV's Loaded, shown here preparing for a show, confirmed what we already knew, since the ring is on the right hand, not the left. Can you suggest a better headline? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: "How can I insult this guy's architecture in 140 characters or less?" by oaktowner. (Photo by Andrew Mager)

Natali Del Conte looking more Fashion Week than Internet Week in a black dress and pearls, speaking at the New York Media Information Exchange Group meetup. Can you suggest a better caption? Do so in the comments. The best one will become the new headline. Yesterday's winner: 26footjasontaylor for "IMPEACH BALLMER. 12 GALAXIES FOR ZEGNOTRONIC ROCKET FUTURE. MSNBC: HARDBALL. MEXELOTRELLIS. HASTERPONIC LESBIANS. VISTA SP1." (Photo by Alexa)

CNET TV personality Natali Del Conte has recorded outtakes from her Loaded Web-video show. The highlight: Del Conte's reinterpretation of Flashdance. This makes us think of an obvious synergy play, now that CBS is buying CNET. CNET hired Del Conte and moved her to New York specifically to get her airtime talking about gadgets on the major broadcast networks. CBS, last I checked, is a major broadcast network. If CBS is serious about reversing its news division's aging demographics, CBS should move Loaded from the Web to primetime. Heck, Katie Couric's not doing so well in the anchor seat. Les Moonves, why not give Natali a spin?

Check out Natali Del Conte on Fox News. Del Conte not only makes her geeky solution to finding a hard-to-find Wii seem simple — "just Google Wii Tracker" — she also advises viewers to buy Wiis bundled with games and then just return the games. Sneaky sneak.

Newly former CNET employee Robert Balousek reports that he was one of 120 U.S. employees laid off by CNET, the online tech publisher. On Wall Street, the company is trying to fend off a takeover attempt by hedge fund Jana Partners. On the Web, the company is trying to stay vaguely relevant as a swarm of tech blogs silence whatever buzz it once had. The good news: CNET TV personality Natali Del Conte is still employed, which means there's some modicum of sense left at headquarters. Witnesses to the carnage, drop us a line. (Photo by Terry Chay)

Really, we didn't think it was possible, but CNET editor Natali Del Conte is even more adorable en español. The bilingual TV personality is anchoring a deal between CNET and Univision, the Hispanic TV channel. "My Spanish-speaking family is WAY more impressed with this than anything else I've ever done," Del Conte told me. "Univision is all they've got so it's a big deal. My mom called me all weepy after she saw it and went, 'Oh my baby! She's speaking Spanish on TV!' My sister said, 'You would think we don't have English-speaking parents!' :)" 32 million U.S. residents speak Spanish at home. Somehow, I don't think they're tuning in to Michael Arrington for the latest on technology.

PodShow, the San Francisco-based online-video network best known for launching the career of CNET's Natali Del Conte, is laying off about 20 employees, or as much as 30 percent of its staff. "There are no secrets, only information you don't yet have," is the slogan for former MTV VJ Adam Curry's podcast. Curry, a PodShow cofounder, didn't show up to deliver information about the firings; we're told he left that to middle managers.

CNET's supertelegenic Natali Del Conte got a Microsoft-sponsored visit from Entourage star Jeremy Piven to talk up Office Live Workspaces. But as Natali said in an email: "They don't use Workspaces. Microsoft just got them to say that they will. I don't understand why Microsoft would have such a non sequitur way to promote this product. The product is good. Why bother with this nonsense?"