When in doubt that your movie might not be the worst movie ever made, add Katherine Heigl to it. That ought to do! Also today: Batman news, Superman news, a comedian goes into business, and a CSI star returns.

Kristen Stewart may soon be whistling while she works. Also today: We have two new Charlie's Angels, Will Ferrell gets an office job, and this New Year's Eve movie keeps getting better.

What's the most efficient way to dislodge a bullet stuck in your head? By sneezing it out, of course! Which is exactly what one Italian man did over New Year's.

Yesterday, Ted Williams—a golden-voiced homeless man in Columbus, Ohio—became an instant viral sensation. Today, he was already on his way to stardom. Now, we've got a just-unearthed NYE 2008 promo that Williams voiced for a friend. Watch inside.

Cliff sex! So alluring—yet so dangerous, as one young Australian woman found out early on New Year's Day. From her brother.

MTV's New Year's broadcast began with the following clip of Jersey Shore's Snooki and SNL's Bobby Moynihan—dressed as Snooki. Inside, they discuss the year that was and get ready for the new year with a "training montage, bitch!"

[This is a fireworks portrait of (non-communist) Chinese revolutionary Sun Yat-sen (from the New Year's celebration in Taipei, Taiwan), but really, it could be anyone, so send this picture your friends and tell them that it's you. Image via AP]

[Organizers of Times Square's New Year's ball drop test the quality of their confetti two days before the big event. Come on. It's confetti. How hard can that be to get right? Image via AP]

The last time Vinny, of Jersey Shore fame, was on camera, he spoke out against hate. Today, he's hyping some sort of Jersey Shore-related New Years special. And he's doing so by impersonating Isaiah Mustafa his classic Old Spice spot.

They're not going to be a couple or anything, but they will both be in New Year's Eve. Also today: some exciting news items for the nerdy among us and AMC orders a new show, as does Nickelodeon.

MTV will have a live show in Times Square on New Year's Eve that will feature Snooki dropping in a ball to mark the advent of 2011. We always figured Snooki would drop the ball, but never like this.

You didn't think it possibly could be, but they've begun casting and there is some bad news. Also today: Get ready for a Coastguard adventure, a Nicole Richie wonderment, and a bachelorette party show that's sure to stun.

No one really knows, so one director, and possibly one actress, are endeavoring to find out. Also today: NBC orders two dubious sounding pilots, Matthew Weiner has a casting change for his first movie, and trouble in New Zealand.

Avatar is finally dethroned, but Sam Worthington is on his way up. Do you want Wheel of Fortune in 3D? Henry Winkler has a new role, and Valentine's Day gets a pre-release sequel. Welcome to a very super Trade Roundup.

If you weren't invited to Russian oligarch Roman Abramovich's $5 million New Year's party in St. Barts—or you were invited but you elected to spend the evening in Times Square with a blue foam hat strapped to your head instead—here's some of what you missed. [Gawker]

• The cover of Vanity Fair's February issue will likely turn plenty of heads: It features a barechested Tiger Woods pumping iron. The photo by Annie Leibovitz was taken before the Woods sex scandal unfolded, however. [VF]
• Is New York Post editor Col Allan retiring? That's the rumor, although Allan says it's just "wishful thinking" on the part of the Daily News. [NYM, Politico]
• Cable spats: Fox and Time Warner reached a deal in their dispute on Friday. But Cablevision customers are still without the Food Network and HGTV.
• Dick Clark has clearly seen better days, but ABC's NYE telecast was No. 1 on Thursday night. NBC's Carson Daly-hosted program came in No. 2. [Variety]
• Disgraced ex-Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich will be one of the "stars" on the next season of Celebrity Apprentice, you'll be thrilled to hear. [UPI]
• Ten years after he presided over the merger of Time Warner and AOL, Jerry Levin now says it was all a big mistake and he's really, really sorry. [THR]
• Good news! The ad market for newspapers, magazines is looking up. [WSJ]
• Arianna Huffington and Glamour's Cindi Leive plan to sleep a lot in '10. [HP]
• Avatar was once again No. 1 at the box office this weekend. The film has now grossed more than $1 billion around the world since it was released. [THR]

New York said goodbye to 2009 and kicked off the decade with a rough 48 hours that included a murder suicide, a crotch stabbing, and a teenage knife fight.

Just because the ball is going to drop for 2010 doesn't mean we can drop the ball on documenting every single second of the sociological experiment of Jersey Shore. We will never forget these new acquaintances. Let's learn more!

That's it, we're calling a wrap on 2009. Please talk among yourselves on #crosstalk. Also: MisterHippity is hosting a Jersey Shore liveblog at 9pm; tomorrow Azaria and Foster will be around to nurse you through your hangover.

[This was an unexpected surprise this morning. Nothing makes finding a cab on New Year's Eve more fun than a nice fresh layer of slush. Have fun kids! Pic via Ho0n's Flickr.]