On December 31 everyone is thinking about ways to improve themselves for the coming year. Why bother? That will all be forgotten by February 12, and then you'll still have problems and be a failure. But we're here to help!
City and state officials aren't going to let you ride the subway for free tonight. (Fares were suspended in 1984 and 1985 in an effort to discourage New Year's Eve drunk driving; the MTA discontinued the program due to budget issues.) But you may still get a free trip home anyway. Cîroc and the vodka company's unfailingly responsible spokesman, Diddy, will distribute "thousands of" free Metrocards and $15 taxi debit cards tonight from 8-11pm as part of a PR stunt called "Safe Rides." The downside: You'll have to go to the meatpacking district or far West Chelsea club zone to get them. [NYT]
• Will the LeRoy family be permitted to auction off Tavern on the Green's "disco lighting," logoed canopy, "revolving coat-check system," and wood paneling next month as they'd hoped? It seems a judge will have to decide. [Bloomberg]
• The week in reviews: Time Out's Jay Cheshes pans Le Caprice, calling it "overhyped" and "bland"; the Times' Sam Sifton hands out a star to Brooklyn's Purple Yam; and Alan Richman of GQ raves about Danny Meyer's Maialino.
• A woman has filed a negligence suit against White Slab Palace on the LES: She says a 150-pound stuffed moose head came crashing down on her. [WPIX]
• Lists: The Post's Steve Cuozzo shares his favorite dishes for winter; Sam Sifton lists 11 memorable dishes he consumed in 2009; the Times recaps its $25-and-under favorites this year; and a "best of '09" list via the WSJ.
• The forthcoming Shake Shack in Nolita will sport a rooftop terrace. [Eater]
• A bunch more NYE dining options, in case you're interested. [GS, Gothamist]
The eight-guidos-in-a-house reality show is MTV's biggest hit in years, but this year Christmas and New Year's Eves land on the show's Thursday night slot. Should they air a show no one will watch or risk further cast overexposure?
CNN Exec.1: Since our usual audience of crotchety senior citizens will be asleep, how will we attract viewers for the NYE countdown? CNN Exec.2: I know, let's get Anderson to call some of his cool gay friends, for a party.
We can't imagine you were thinking about spending New Year's Eve in the middle of Times Square shivering with a million or so other people. But if you were contemplating the idea, you'll be pleased to hear that the NYPD is beefing up security for the big event and will have "radiation and biological detection devices" on hand, "decontamination facilities" at the ready, and sniper teams in position. (All you need to bring is a hat and a flask of whiskey hidden in your pants, and you'll be good to go!) Oh, and if you notice anything suspicious, don't hesitate to take Mayor Bloomberg's advice: "If you see anything, they'll be plenty of police officers to talk to. Walk up and say, 'Hey, I may be wrong, but that guy looks nefarious.'" (Just be prepared to explain to the cop what "nefarious" means, of course.) [Fox5]
Which New Year's Eve TV experience was more painful: Kathy Griffin screaming about knocking "dicks outta your mouth" on CNN, or Dick Clark's stroke-ravaged Frankenstein muttering on ABC? Click to watch and choose.
Just in case you haven't made plans for tonight and tomorrow, here are a bunch of places to eat, drink, party, and be merry. Or just stay at home, go to sleep early, and dream about a healthy and happy 2009.
The Dow Jones industrial average will end the year down more than 34 percent, which makes it the worst year for the index since 1931. Just how much money has evaporated? About $7 trillion, which adds up to six years' worth of gains. On a cheerier note, there weren't any murders in Central Park in 2008, although you still have about eight hours or so to change that if you have nothing better to do this evening. [NYT]
When the NYPD looks at the Jonas Brothers, they see something far more ominous than a fraternal trio of virginally delicious pop stars: They see a NYE riot at the Crossroads of the World.
Forget protecting the city from terrorist attacks or solving crime. The NYPD's biggest concern these days, at least according to People magazine? "The mob scene that could result when the Jonas Brothers perform in Times Square" on New Year's Eve. The only thing that will save New York's Finest from the utter mayhem? The weather forecast of 17 degrees and a chance of snow and rain. [People]
Bill and Hillary Clinton are going to be pushing the ceremonial button to lower the ball in Times Square on New Year's Eve! No, it's not quite like as exciting as having your finger on the button in the Oval Office, but the opportunity to make small talk with Ryan Seacrest should more than make up for it. [NYP]
New Year's Eve—the most important drinking night of the year—is almost upon us! What kind of party are you going to? Only five types exist, which I will detail for you after the jump.
• A list of spots where you can save on stress and dine out on Christmas. [NYM]
• Tips on how to avoid food poisoning at Grandma's house this year. [NYDN]
• Frank Bruni checks in on Tom Colicchio's Tuesday Dinner and Brian Bistrong's Braeburn in today's Times. [NYT, NYT]
• Is champagne too ostentatious given current events? Try punch. [NYT, NYT]
• Just in case you feel like skipping ahead to New Year's Eve, here's a complete rundown of events planned for the big night. [Citysearch]
Looking to reserve a spot for your New Year's Eve party? The Renaissance Hotel in Times Square is planning to auction off its third-floor restaurant, which formerly housed the much-maligned Chop Suey, with the bidding starting at $150,000. Spending that kind of money on a lousy restaurant located within a lousy hotel might seem a little strange. (Hey, for the same amount, you could hold a party for five straight nights in the most expensive suite room in town.) But we're guessing the hotel's general manager realizes this, too, since he says he expects "someone from overseas"—someone who's never actually been to the hotel, we're presuming—to ring in with the highest bid.
Having been far too long since we've checked in with our Defamer PartyWatchers, photographer Maggie Serrano (sans trusty cohort Ann) braved the eardrum-blowing decibels of downtown's Hard New Year's Eve Music Festival, where she captured some of our city's most wasted spirited revelers ring in 2008 to the highly danceable grooves of French techno-duo Justice, Canadian electrofilthyclasher Peaches, and 2 Live Crew. Check out our image gallery of the festivities.
