In the past, we have used this space to mock new New York Times columnist Frank Bruni for starting out poorly, then getting progressively, unbelievably worse. He seems to lack any convictions at all, let alone interesting ones; though he's only been on the job for half a year, he's already been reduced to padding his column with excruciatingly boring stories from his own life, due to his apparent dearth of worthwhile ideas about important issues.

Kelly Evans is a financial columnist for the Wall Street Journal. Unlike most columnists, she arrives at work at 6:45 a.m. That's because Kelly Evans has a second job: she's the co-anchor for the Journal's 8:30 a.m. video newscast, the "News Hub," which plays on the WSJ's homepage just as thousands upon thousands of readers are reading their morning financial news. How many of those traders and brokers and analysts and corporate office drones have fallen in love?

Although virtually every big newspaper company has suffered major layoffs, declining stock prices, and general existential malaise for the past several years, the last one to actually declare bankruptcy was Tribune Co., which was actively destroyed by a gnomish billionaire's arrogance and incompetence. Well, good news, Tribune: you have company!

Last month, the hapless investment firm that had purchased the San Diego Union-Tribune in 2009, thinking its value would appreciate (ha), found a sucker buyer: San Diego businessman Doug Manchester, who reportedly paid more than $110 million.

This past summer, longtime alt (to the Village Voice)-weekly The New York Press died, a victim of neglect and mismanagement, fated to disappear into its ill-fitting parent company. Sad! But! Now! Joe Pompeo reports that the Press is being relaunched, online-only, by "Tom Allon, the owner of [parent company] Manhattan Media and a 2013 mayoral candidate." What's the plan, Tom?

Oregon's shield law, which protects journalists from being forced to reveal a source, doesn't apply to independent bloggers, a court ruled. Sucks to be you, Oregon bloggers. Try printing out your blog posts and pretending to be a newspaper.

The holidays are almost upon us, which means it's time for you to take a careful look at your neighbor and report any and all suspicious activity to your immediate supervisor. At least it is at the New York Times, which just sent a memo to all staffers urging them snitch on any co-worker who may have engaged in any "potential ethical or legal violations." IF YOU SEE SOMETHING SAY SOMETHING. David Pogue, your ears are burning! Memo after the jump.

Warren Buffett, the third-richest man in the world, is buying the Omaha World-Herald, his hometown newspaper. The purchase price has not been revealed. But even if it was, oh, $50 million, it would be a purchase for Warren Buffett approximately proportional to you buying a cheap pair of shoes.

Syracuse's assistant basketball coach, Bernie Fine, was fired after being accused of child molestation. And now, on top of it all, there's this photo choice by the Tacoma News Tribune. When will this nightmare end?

This looks like a joke, but apparently it's real? London design shop BERG has unveiled its Little Printer, which can print, every morning, a 10-inch receipt strip of capsule news, puzzles and social network summary. Because the newspaper was not yet a sufficiently debased medium.

As if the News Corp. hacking scandal weren't already lousy with pitch-perfect villains, a new one has topped them all. Former News of the World deputy features editor Paul McMullan gave a bravura performance today before a British government inquiry into the press scandal, gamely defending the most loathsome transgressions of his colleagues in the U.K. tabloid press with Snidely Whiplash relish.

When we last checked in on Fox News chief Roger Ailes' campaign to transform his peaceful, adopted rural redoubt of Putnam County, N.Y., into the sort of cesspit of fear and dread that he's more comfortable with, he was publicly pushing, threatening, and mocking the 80-year-old proprietor of a local newspaper that rivals his own vanity papers. Now he's trying to sue the guy out of existence.

In your mordant Monday media column: NotW readers disappear, newspapers must advertise, Keith Gessen's pale jail tale, the Tribune Co. screws more shareholders, in-house news, and your headline fuckup of the day.

British child phenom Charlotte Church—the little girl with "the voice of an angel"—graced Rupert Murdoch's 1999 wedding to Wendi Deng with a song. How sweet! He got her to do it for free by promising not to savage her with his newspapers. Then he savaged her anyway.

Brittle fabulist James Murdoch, who's been under fire for months on account of how he lied to Parliament, twice, about the criminal hacking enterprise he presides over as chairman of News International, has stepped down from the boards governing the defunct News of the World and the Times.

In your tricky Tuesday media column: how to get fired at the Washington Post, NPR listeners are just so ugh, Lane Brown to New York mag, Michelangelo Signorile to HuffPo, and a shocking report about women in media.

In your merciless Monday media column: Bloomberg rules, Romenesko is back, the endless "off the record" debate, David Frum vs. Fox News, and Luke Russert's all grown up.

In your finally Friday media column: Newsweek sucks, Chelsea Clinton's NBC infiltration works, a bodybuilder becomes a magazine editor, drone journalism arrives, and your angry layoff rant of the day.

In your grim Thursday media column: Pigs nab Gessen, newspaper layoffs, newspapers sales, overall newspaper desperation, the real issues in OWS coverage, and Fleshbot could be yours!

Our man Herman Cain had a scheduled interview at 10 a.m. this morning with the editorial board of the New Hampshire Union Leader, the state's biggest newspaper. Every candidate does this interview. Dumb turd Rick Perry even did it!