LiveJournal founder Brad Fitzpatrick is a prankster, as evidenced by his Halloween costume last year, when the new Googler dressed up as Facebook to mock his coworkers' fears of the social network. I'm told that in Once You're Lucky, Twice You're Good, Sarah Lacy's new book about Web 2.0, there's an anecdote about Fitzpatrick submitting an expense report — successfully! — for "hookers and blow" when he worked at blog software startup Six Apart. That was likely a reference to the early days of LiveJournal, when users made ridiculous accusations that Fitzpatrick was spending money meant for servers and bandwidth on "hookers and blow." We'd love to hear more, but alas, Fitzpatrick only got 8 out of 294 pages, according to the book's index. Here's the page for "D" through "F":

Today on Essentially Emily, Emily Brill asserts that Nick Denton is not the only reason why people bother to read Essentially Emily. No, they care about the pseudo socialite who is "friends" with Kristian Laliberte because of her dad, former media tycoon and current airport security specialist Steve Brill, and not because Gawker occasionally highlights her wit and wisdom. Emily claims, "Nick's greatest fantasy, indeed, would have been a public feud with Steven Brill over his humiliated daughter." I've been to Nick's apartment, and his fantasies have nothing to do with Steve Brill.

TIME moves its annual poll to decide the year's most influential people online (for You!). Screw up the poll and vote for finalist and Gawker publisher-editor Nick Denton. [TIME]

Newly softhearted Gawker Media head Nick Denton offers some kindly advice for TechCrunch editor Michael Arrington: "@Michael Arrington: Hey, everybody has been expecting the grand roll-up ever since you hired Heather. I don't see it happening. Certainly don't see it sticking. And, without a roll-up, you have a niche Valley site with some 3% of the traffic of Gawker or Weblogs Inc. Good luck with that when the tech bubble bursts!"

Gawker Media Publisher (and acting Gawker Managing Editor) Nick Denton just sent word around that he's sold three sites. April Fool's! Except for real this time! Maura Johnston's Idolator, the music industry gossip and news site, goes to Buzznet—the "music-focused web and social

network" that recently bought Stereogum. Gridskipper, the urban travel site, goes to Lockhart Steele's Curbed network. And Wonkette, Ken Layne's political news site, is now Ken Layne's alone. If you're looking for official comment from us, we think all three sites will be better off under ownership by people who actually care about their respective topics (even though no one should ever buy blogs). Denton's internal email is below, because he's off this morning and why not beat the Observer to running it?

Is Nick Denton going soft? Even his cutbacks are sentimental these days. In the old days, Denton, the publisher of Valleywag and 14 other Gawker Media blogs, would simply shutter blogs. These days, he worries first about finding them nice homes. Such is the velvet-glove treatment he's giving Gridskipper, Wonkette, and Idolator, his blogs about, respectively, travel, politics, and music. The three blogs amount to less than 3 percent of Gawker Media's traffic, he says. Fine, so why keep them around in any form? Silicon Alley Insider has the details on their new owners. More evidence of Denton's increasing namby-pambosity: Instead of threatening to fire leakers, he's encouraging us to post the internal memo announcing the move. Darling bossman, that's no fun. But also no reason to keep the memo from you, dear readers:

The week's not complete until bulldog-cute Mahalo chief Jason Calacanis writes in. Today JC emailed twice to call out a gaping hole in the much-discussed New Dentonomics of our 2008 Valleywag pay scale. His numbers are out of date; our new pageview rate for the second quarter is in, and it's $6.50 per thousand pageviews. But Calacanis spotted a bigger slap to the face than the CPM, one so big that Portfolio blogger Felix Salmon will have to do a whole 'nother post now to say he knew it all along. Can you guess what it is?

For some of the Web's more respected names, it's a really special day. They get to treat their readers and fans with the contempt they hide most of the year. Below, five pranks today that show just how much the Internet hates you. And I do mean you.

Coincidentally, the Valleywag crew was chatting in Campfire about how much we loved a new site we'd discovered, Downforeveryoneorjustme.com, right before we had to use it on our own site. Some theories we came up with: Nick Denton, Gawker Media's owner and publisher of Valleywag, likes to bring down his sites occasionally just to watch how his editors deal with the unbearable pressure of not being able to write. As part of Jason Calacanis's new Valleywag charm campaign, Mahalo guides posted so many links to us that it brought the site down. Or, most plausibly, outraged Arthur C. Clarke fans launched a denial-of-service campaign against the unremarkable observation that the deceased sci-fi writer was an admitted pedophile.

New strategy for dealing with Nick Denton: everyone give him a HUGE 30second hug. We will hug the love back into him (nick carlson's idea!)

What is Michael Arrington smoking? His self-indulgent fantasy: All the bloggers should band together into a "dream team," owning equity in the joint venture. "Someone needs to pony up a big round of financing around an existing blog, or perhaps a new entity, and then start rolling them up into a big fat CNET crushing $200 million/year in revenue business," he writes. That existing blog he has in mind is obviously TechCrunch, though he never comes out and says it. What pushed him into this delusion? A rumor that Silicon Alley Insider is raising a $3 million to $5 million round and that PaidContent is also seeking more financing, a charge founder Rafat Ali doesn't exactly deny. Arrington doesn't want his competitors to raise money, because that will screw his ambitions for a big blog rollup.

So the blog by Spitzer's call girl is obvs fake, because all she writes about is blogs. I wish it were harder to tell, or at least had clever jokes, because then she could join this list of the ten best ever parody blogs.

"I ask Dave if he always knew Nick [Denton] would be a success. 'The last time I was asked this by a newspaper I said I knew Nick was going to be successful because he read The Economist when he was 13. When [that comment] was published Nick phoned me up and took the piss out of me for it, said it made me sound suburban. So this time I'm going to say it's a fucking miracle he ever amounted to anything.'"

The metaphor is made incarnate. Nick Denton has always credited himself with starting Julia Allison's career through Gawker's constant coverage of her every professional and personal move. Of course he can argue that the young media personality makes herself a target by writing forty blog posts a day, mostly with photos of herself, or photos of herself holding photos of herself. Conversely, the more Allison rises to fame, the more Denton's profile rises as a star-maker. All of which is perfectly expressed in this photomosaic, in which commenter Heather Watson combined 625 Julia-pixels to make one big portrait of Nick. Watson provides a poster-sized version for your bedroom wall.

Web entrepreneur Denton is the founder of Gawker Media, a collection of nine blogs covering niches ranging from media gossip to gadgets to porn.

My boss, Nick Denton, may be banned from Facebook, for posting photos of Emily Brill, daughter of entrepreneur Steve Brill. Insiders at the social network tell me that they have considered similar sanctions against me, especially after I posted the story of Facebook PR chief Brandee Barker befriending her Microsoft counterpart, Adam Sohn, shortly before Microsoft invested $240 million in Facebook. In solidarity, I'll now take a similar risk by posting this charming photo of Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg and his girlfriend, Priscilla Chan, taken while the two were goofing off during a BusinessWeek photo shoot.

Entrepreneurs. Engineers. Bloggers. You keep asking: Why does a writer like me hate people like you? Nick Denton's new traffic-based pay scale has backfired wonderfully, giving me a few minutes to explain it.

Feast your eyes on the trailer for upcoming thriller Untracable. The high concept: "People visit a website that is livestreaming a murder — an increase in traffic speeds up the process of death." The film's erratic killer has "no vision beyond page views." [Filmoculous via Kottke.org]

Nick Denton likes his blogs a bit dark. But his readers seem to disagree. io9, Gawker Media's sci-fi blog, has been its most successful launch to date, with 750,000 pageviews, followed closely by Jezebel. Shiny, happy futurism and go-girl feminism sell better than bleak wit and sardonic jabs at the powers that be.