A man accused of masturbating near a woman in a Manhattan subway station Monday night, then pulling a gun on man who tried to catch him on video, has been arrested and identified as a retired NYPD cop.

New York Governor Andrew Cuomo officially shut New York City's subway system down Monday night in anticipation of a potentially "crippling" blizzard, but according to reports, the trains are still running—city residents just can't ride them.

Ever wondered what New York City's subways and train stations would look like after some sort of apocalyptic event? Well, the photos on the MTA's Flickr page right now give you a good idea.

Jasheem Smiley of Williamsburg says he was on a southbound 4 train early Sunday morning when he saw a man sit down next to a sleeping woman and sexually assault her in full view of other riders.

Of course not, you're not a moron.

Caroline Stern and her boyfriend George Hess were waiting for their train at the Columbus Circle subway station just before midnight when a busker began playing music on steel drums and they decided to dance along.

Less than a day after filmmaker Dean Peterson's short doc about the mischievous subway stair at the 36th Street station gained viral status, the MTA has put an end to the voyeuristic schadenfreude by bringing in a repair crew.

The 36th Street station in Brooklyn has one tiny flaw that sets it apart from all the other subway stations in the city: One of its stairs "is a fraction of an inch higher" than the rest.

Is it possible to bridge the divide between two NYC subway platforms?

It's not just passengers that are acting up on the subway. Employees of the MTA are misbehaving as well! Here's footage that a YouTube user (and Bloombergian anti-smoking activist, we're guessing) recorded of a couple of MTA workers smoking inside the Christopher Street 1 Train station on Sunday morning. Are you totally outraged yet? Is the smell of smoke better or worse than the usual subway odor of urine and feces? We're just grateful that these guys didn't follow in the footsteps of these people and strip off all their clothes.

This video was uploaded to YouTube earlier today. And if I had to venture a guess, it looks like one young woman decided to beat the record-setting New York City heat by riding a Manhattan-bound D train completely naked from the waist down. No, it's not the most polite thing to do on the subway. But on a sweltering day like today, can you really blame her?

Like a citified version of the story that inspired last year's James Franco rock-climbing movie, the tale of urban survivalist and litigant Jonathan Lynn involves a necessary act of arm-related self-harm. Luckily, no amputation was necessary.