Just when you think living in New York can't get any dumber, the New York Times' Real Estate section arrives. This Sunday New Yorkers were treated to a story on married couples who've taken roommates into their already too-small apartments. Because money's already tight and you can't afford a place just for the two of you, how much worse could it get sharing a fridge with 22-year-old Tyler?

Brooklyn home prices are up 18% since last year—a time when they were already unaffordable. Explorers in search of "the next Brooklyn" have reached the Himalayan foothills, where they are awaiting mortgages and supplies.

This afternoon, Massachusetts Senator and presidential non-candidate Elizabeth Warren spoke to a crowd of 200 sweaty fans at the Strand book store in Manhattan. Everything she said was true, which is fairly remarkable, for a politician.

A New York commuter is alive today after climbing off of the subway tracks just before an incoming 6 train would have struck and smashed him. No thanks to anyone but himself.

Manhattan's Pearl River Mart, the cool Chinese trinket superstore in Soho, has announced it will close because rent on its three-level space will be raised from around $100K a month to more than $500K a month. Perfect space for another chain store.

It's bad enough that the "broken windows theory" of policing, with its constant harassment of small-time hustlers, is back in vogue in New York City. Do they have to steal the churros, too?

Are you a parent? Have you hired a nanny? Have you given that nanny a written "job description?" Is it 22 pages long? You monster.

Two years after Elisa Lopez was filmed being sexually assaulted while sleeping on a 4 train, the NYPD has arrested Carlos Chuva, 43, whom after being shown a still from the video told police, "That is me."

A fifteen-year-old boy died on Thursday while attempting to jump from one roof to another in the Crown Heights neighborhood of Brooklyn, the New York Times reports. The teen was with a group of friends on an adjacent roof when he fell to his death.

Renters at the most expensive building in one of the most rapidly gentrifying neighborhoods in the least affordable housing market in America are receiving "insane" monthly heating bills of up to $700 for a two-bedroom apartment. Disabling the heat in all of Brooklyn's new condos could solve a lot of problems at once.

The average monthly rent for a studio apartment in Manhattan has reached $2,350, the highest on record—"incomes aren't rising as fast as Manhattan rents, leading tenants to seek affordability by finding smaller spaces."

Mayor Bill de Blasio announced on Wednesday that two days in the NYC public school year will be turned into days off in observance of Muslim holidays Eid al-Adha and Eid al-Fitr.

As you approach the entrance to the church property, eerie noises waft out of its windows. At first, you might think what you're hearing is the native noise of the parsonage house itself—built in 1853, it sits, paint chipping and distressed, adjacent to an overgrown graveyard—but as you get closer, you realize the sound is coming from inside the building. It is the unsettling, sweeping theme from the film Psycho, played on loop.

Here is an email illustrating how brands (Sprite, in this case) pay off reporters and bloggers with free stuff as a direct quid pro quo for coverage. There's also some info about a TOP SECRET Drake and Nas concert we would like to share.

UrbanBaby.com has a reputation as the message board of choice for wealthy, sophisticated, hateful east coast urbanites. What is the real lineage of anonymous UrbanBaby posters? Why, they are glad that you asked.

The Metropolitan Transit Authority voted on Thursday to raise the price of single-ride Metrocards on subways and buses by an additional 25 cents, making a trip anywhere in New York City cost $2.75. When will the madness stop?

Traditionally, young people come to the big city with a dream; then, when that dream inevitably fails to materialize, many of them move away to some smaller, more forgiving town and cry silently, years later, at what might have been. Now, the fucking tables have turned.

On Thursday, the folks over at the New York Times Weekend Arts section proposed an interesting question: if Paddington is the little Peruvian bear in boots who has come to represent London, which character in history would be the best and most model representative of New York City?

In New York City, where you can't go to your neighborhood pizza joint without being reminded of early childhood educational trauma and potential contamination, letter grades are in and casual dining with rodents is out. In a new move proposed by Bronx Borough President Ruben Diaz Jr., putting a letter grade on salons of all styles is potentially also in our future.