An old cat—can you imagine? Little glasses. Sitting in a chair while he reads a book. You see him in a bar having a drink by himself and it makes you sad for a minute, rudely—probably he isn’t even sad. Congratulations to Corduroy, the oldest living cat.

On August 1st, Corduroy, a cat from Sisters, Oregon, turned 26 years old. He is now a Guinness World Record holder. Incredible. If you’re wondering whether or not 26 is old for a cat—it sounds kind of old, but those jerks seem to stick around for a long time—I’ll tell you that it is, in fact, old for a cat. According to Google.com, “average cat death age” is 10-14 years.

However, if you’re wondering whether or not 26 is an impressive age compared to the age the oldest cat ever lived to reach, I’ll tell you—it isn’t really. That cat was named Crème Puff and she lived to be 38.

Regardless, congratulations to Corduroy. You’re still alive.

Image via Guinness World Records. Contact the author at kelly.conaboy@gawker.com.