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• With his second seed born just weeks ago, Kevin Federline takes to Vegas for a weekend of binge-drinking, banquette-dancing, and trying to forget that he actually married to Britney Spears. [Page Six]
• Democratic congressional candidate Kirsten Gillibrand enlists Oscar-winner David Strathairn to act like Ed Murrow in her campaign video. Fantasy politics are the next big thing. [R&M]
• Star Jones and Al Reynolds finally get the hint and leave Manhattan, opting for Speedo-friendly Miami. Al just loves South Beach. [Page Six]
• Larry Birkhead, the photographer who claims to be the father of Anna Nicole Smith's child, files a paternity suit after Smith's pseudo-husband/lawyer Howard K. Stern tells Larry King that he's the father. We know the woman has money, but why is everyone so eager to get credit for fucking her? Seriously, it's no grand achievement. [TMZ]
• Mark Foley just doesn't understand why a bunch of naked kids would be in a hot tub and not think to invite him. [Lowdown]