Lindsay's favorite non-alcoholic beverage is alcoholic! Lady Gaga shocks another sports stadium. Snooki throws a drink. Good Morning America has a gay kiss double-standard. "Kidnapped" Jeremy London's story keeps getting dumber. Saturday's Gossip Roundup is advancing to the next round.

  • A lot of people have reported that Lindsay Lohan is off the hook after a urine test contradicted a positive SCRAM reading after the MTV awards. But Radar says no! A source tells them the Scram showed Lindsay's alcohol level was as high as .04 after the awards, and that a urine test the next morning wouldn't have got the previous night's drinking. Or is maybe this all just a huge misunderstanding? As you may know, Whole Foods recently pulled the gross fermented tea known as kombucha from its shelves after it was discovered to be more alcoholic than they thought. Lilo loves the stuff! So maybe that set off the SCRAM? Unlikely, as there is so little alcohol that she would basically have to drink a keg to even register a BAC. [Radar] [TMZ]
  • A few days ago, Lady Gaga was in the news for stripping down to her underwear and flipping off everyone at the Mets' Citi Field. Yesterday, she showed up at Yankee Stadium wearing only lingerie, fishnets and a huge Yankees jersey draped over everything. She didn't flip anyone off, though! Truly turned over a new leaf, Lady Gaga has. [NYDN]
  • Like many of us, Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi enjoys the occasional adult beverage. Unlike us, when she throws a drink at a bouncer, the only thing that happens is everyone starts laughing. At SL on Wed., Snooki got drunk and threw her drink in the bouncer's face. She yelled, "I'm a fucking star, beautiful enough to do what I want!" Then everyone started laughing, and the credits rolled on another episode of The Snooki Show. [Radar]
  • So unfair! Good Morning America banned Adam Lambert from performing on the show at its ungodly hour because of his ungodly gay kiss. But yesterday, Miley Cyrus got to perform even after her lesbian kiss on "Britain's Got Talent". This is the most pressing gay rights issue of our time. [TMZ]
  • Jesse James: Moving to Austin, Texas from Los Angeles. Sandra Bullock owns a house in Austin, Texas! Now Janine Lindemulder, Jesse's Porn Star ex, is threatening to move down there too, so she can be with her daughter. All we need is Bombshell McGee to move to Austin and open up a BBQ shack with Lindemulder and we've got the start of the worst sit com ever made. [People]
  • Ha ha Mallrats actor Jeremy London's tall tale of being kidnapped and "forced" to smoke crack keeps getting stupider. After London and his wife got a flat tire, one of the kidnappers actually drove his wife home before "kidnapping" London and "forcing" him to smoke drugs. What polite kidnappers! This is like that time those Somali pirates safely delivered all the cargo in the ship they hijacked, after forcing the captain to smoke crack. [Radar]
  • Megan Fox is engaged to Brian Austin Green. Now she is wearing a giant black ring instead of her 2-carat engagement ring because she lost it on the beach 2 hours after Green proposed to her. Whoops. [US]
  • Bethenny Frankel says that even though she has "five pounds to lose... I don't even know if I'll lose them!" [US]
  • Funny lawsuit: The owners of a building in Venice, CA are suing "Millionaire Matchmaker" Patti Stranger because footage of their building is in her terrible show. [TMZ]
  • Warren Beatty and Annette Bening's daughter, 18 year-old Kathlyn, is having gender re-assignment surgery, according to the Inquirer. She will be now known as the son of Warren Beatty to her college classmates. [Telegraph]
  • Shane West ("A Walk To Remember") partied with no less than 15 "good-looking, younger women" at the Gold Lounge in New York. [P6]