Kevin Spacey fights for the right to stay in the glass closet. Nick Cannon confirms that Mariah's having twins. David Arquette confirms that he's having a breakdown. Thursday gossip knows that you know that he knows, but what about her?

  • Former Vanity Fair writer Kevin Sessums gave Kevin Spacey the third degree about his sexuality, and Spacey argued for the right to stay in the glass closet. (And spank sexy naked butts therein.) Sessums: "We gay men have always proudly claimed you as a member of our tribe, and yet you don't proudly claim us back. " Spacey: "I don't live a lie. You have to understand that people who choose not to discuss their personal lives are not living a lie." Spacey compares outing celebrities to bullying gay teens: "I don't understand people who say, 'Well, this is a terrible thing that is happening to this young person whose life is being exposed,' and then turn around and do it to another person." Sessums brings up how powerful it would be to see Spacey do an "It Gets Better" video, and Spacey agrees and says he'd "absolutely" do it. At least America will always have heartwarming YouTube clips for common ground? This is one of the few times that a celebrity interview actually provokes thought, so I recommend reading it. [TheDailyBeast, Image via Getty]
  • Nick Cannon finally confirmed it: Wife Mariah Carey is expecting twins! This is one of those rare cases with every improbable tabloid rumor ultimately turns out to be true. Next up: Nick Cannon makes a cameo on Alien Autopsy. [Us]
  • "Matt Damon Doesn't Spank His Kids, But Does He Spank His Wife?" Best headline ever for a total boring article about a famous person giving quotes about nonviolence. [Celebitchy, People]
  • Did Michael C. Hall fall out of his marriage and into Julia Stiles' arms? There's a new rumor that Julia wrecked the Hall-Carpenter home! Or maybe Hall wrecked himself, and Julia just happened to have a role on his TV show at the time, and now she's thinking, "Great, now my reputation is going to be ruined." Beautiful starlets are rumor magnets. If a scandal occurs within a certain radius of their being, their beauty will suck the scandal mythos in. [Celebitchy]
  • In other celebrity divorce news, Scarlett Johansson is weathering hers in Jamaica with her girlfriends. [People]
  • Winona Ryder remembers the good ol' days when Mel Gibson's raging offensiveness only turned up when he was drunk at parties. (As opposed to scream-fest digital recordings all over the internet.) She recalls one alcohol-soaked party where "it came up that I was Jewish. He said something about 'oven dodgers.'" He also made a gay joke. [GQ via P6]
  • Denise Richards is dating Motley Crue bassist Nikki Sixx. She's really got a thing for aging badasses, doesn't she? After Charlie Sheen, even notorious rockstars seem offenseless as a hamster. [Us]
  • Did Camille Grammer threaten to release a raunchy sex tape if Kelsey Grammer didn't give her the divorce settlement she wanted? "Lie." Phew. [TMZ]
  • After two failed marriage, Shannen Doherty is still a glass half-full kind of girl: "I believe in marriage." Cue rom-com montage. [People]
  • Lindsay Lohan has a stalker. Aren't we all her stalker? But this one calls her on the phone, so she needs extra security. [TMZ]

Pamela Anderson posed for her thirteenth Playboy cover. Instead of an interview, she gave them a poem. Final line: "May all your bombs be bombshells." [Us, NSFW Playboy]

  • "Are you having a nervous breakdown?" Howard Stern asked a newly single, oversharing David Arquette. "I believe so," Arquette replied. Then he told a story about running into Tom Cruise and calling him "Sean" because "I was a little wasted." As is now the rule for David Arquette, the interview veers into tragic territory shortly thereafter: "I"ve been drinking a lot because I'm heartbroken. It's really a personal, traumatic thing." In other news, I finally understand Howard Stern's genius: He's the world's worst therapist, for the world's most misled people. The strange sex stunts are but an elaborate set-up for Freudian analysis. [HowardStern, Us, People]