Like all real Americans, Texas' Republican Gov. Rick Perry hates government bailouts. He even started a petition called "No Government Bailouts"! So it's awkward that his state balanced its budget almost entirely thanks to the federal government's stimulus program.

Yes, that's right, 97 percent of Texas' shortfall for the fiscal year 2010 was covered by some $6.4 billion in money from the Recovery Act. In fact, Perry requested the money on the same day he launched his stupid petition. (The state has a $9.1 billion "rainy day fund" that escaped the year unscathed thanks to the bailout money.)

What happened? Was Perry tricked by the devious socialist "President"? No, actually, he just wanted the money:

"Texas would have balanced its budget regardless of the presence of stimulus dollars," said Lucy Nashed, Perry's deputy press secretary. "This money came from the pockets of Texas taxpayers, and we are committed to getting our fair share of these dollars, which would have otherwise been disbursed to other states."

[CNN; image via AP]