Charlie Sheen cut a porn star $30,000 after she partied with him. Sheen also says he's fine. Demi Lovato returns from rehab, and Chris Brown wants to go to awards shows with Rhianna. Saturday Gossip Roundup!

  • Add "escorts" to the things that fueled Charlie Sheen's briefcase-of-coke-fueled bender. Sheen paid porn star Kacey Jordan $30,000 when she left his mansion after partying with him, and TMZ has a copy of the check made out to "cash". And here we thought she was just hanging out with him because she was a huge terminal velocity fan. But there were four other porn stars at his mansion, right? Did he pay them all $30,000? Seems crazy. And why haven't the other porn stars come out to receive their tabloid covers and inevitable career bump? So many mysteries; this is like the Roswell of benders. [TMZ, Radar]
  • More Sheen news! He's broken his silence re: coke-fueled bender. In a text message to Radar he said "I'm fine. People don't seem to get it… guy can't have a great time and do his job also?" He also called his haters "bunch of turds." It's funny that he thinks the fact that he can do his job is a mitigating factor. Have you ever seen Two and a Half Men? Sheen could probably do that show while under general anesthesia pending a kidney stone operation and the quality would not be noticeably affected. [Radar]
  • Finally, here a video of porn star Kacey Jordan talking about her wild night with Charlie Sheen. [TMZ]
  • 18 year-old Disney star Demi Lovato has returned from more than a month rehab. She checked in after reportedly punching a back-up dancer in the face. Was she being treated for Excessive Punching Syndrome? No: She was being treated for eating disorders, "emotional issues," depression and cutting, according to the New York Post. Being professionally cheerful all the time really takes a toll, which is why we are always bitter. [P6]
  • Some crazed fan stole Entourage star Adrian Grenier's shirt. Now Grenier's DNA will be sequenced, and the gene for attractiveness isolated. [P6]
  • Chris Brown wants the restraining order against him in the Rhianna case lifted because his lawyer said "it makes it difficult at awards shows and such." This is bullshit, Chris Brown doesn't win awards. [Radar]
  • Snooki and Jwoww are considering moving into a pretty modest place on Long Island for their new reality show. What they don't tell you is there's a super-secure panic room in the basement for when the drama gets too much. [TMZ]
  • Jamie Pressly filed for divorce from her husband Simran Singh. They were married since 2009. So sad. I loved her in that movie and/or TV show she was in. [People]

[Image via Getty]