Nicki Minaj curses out a maid, and the end result is a battery charge. Kim Kardashian says her newlywed life is "not ideal." Alexa Ray Joel opens up about HPV. Usher gets in a fight over a parking space. TGIFriday gossip.

  • Nicki Minaj got into a heated fight with a maid this morning, and the result was police flocking to Nicki's house and a criminal complaint. The intrepid stalkers at TMZ have yet to put the pieces together, but it goes something like this:

  • Law enforcement tells us, a couple of weeks ago, Nicki's maid took a photo of the singer out of the trash and then asked Nicki to sign it. Nicki got pissed and fired her.

  • Cops say the maid returned today. Others say it was actually a different maid, but Nicki couldn't tell them apart. Either way, TMZ says Nicki flew off the handle:

  • A source privy to the fight tells TMZ, the maid stood her ground, demanding not to be "treated like an animal"—at which point, Nicki allegedly said, "I'll show you how to treat someone like an animal... get the f**k out of my house!"

  • The fight escalated and "Nicki's boyfriend got in the act and began pushing the maid with his body." Wait, Nicki has a boyfriend? Who? And how do you push someone "with your body"? Hip check? Belly bump? The maid's boss called the cops and the maid filed a battery report. Nobody was arrested even though "the maid asked to make a citizen's arrest." Why would you do that if the cops were present? This story is so mysterious. [TMZ, image via Getty]
  • Kim Kardashian says her newlywed life is "not ideal" because it lacks privacy. Pssst, Kim, I have a secret to tell you: Broadcasting your daily life is optional. [People]
  • After Kate Major pressed domestic violence charges against boyfriend Michael Lohan, tabloid reporters and photographers "swarmed" her home, causing her landlord to evict her. She's "trying to fight" it, but "it doesn't look good." [TMZ]
  • Tom Cruise progeny Connor Cruise is a DJ. He says his dad "loves it." DJ name: "DJ C-Squared." [Us]
  • "Girls, can we all pledge that we will not dress slutty for this Halloween?" —Nicole Richie, a woman famous for flashing her boobs professional photographers with Paris Hilton by her side. Being a mom changes things. [Us]

Alexa Ray Joel on getting HPV from an ex-boyfriend: "I had it. But I mean, a lot of people get it from my ex... I wasn't angry with him, because it's so common and he wasn't cheating on me." Later in the interview, she discusses her bizarre first kiss, which occurred when she 17 and at junior prom:

I was really, really afraid of boys for a good two years. I got up the courage to talk to them by junior year. And then I had this date for junior prom with this really good looking guy. I remember his name, Alex Coffman. He kissed me and I was so nervous this was the first time I was hooking up, and I didn't know if he was going to try to like, take my top off. I had this really nice prom dress on and I didn't know how to get it off because my mom did it up for me. So I actually, believe it or not— and this is why I'm taking acting classes now— I pretended to faint. I was like, "Let's hook up I'm comfortable it's great," but I was so scared that I actually pretended to pass out in the Hummer. I went "Oh, I'm really not feeling well". He said, "No, no, no, come on," and he stuck my head in the ice bucket in the Hummer.

I feel like we learned a lot about Alexa Ray Joel's sex life just now. Note: That is "Hummer" the car, not "hummer" the sex act. [XOJane, photo via Billy Farrell Agency]

  • A non-handicapped Usher parked his car in a handicap spot, and some lady went totally nuts, screaming and flailing at him, while her young child wept. Naturally, there is video. [TMZ]
  • Sandra Bullock's agents bought her 1-year-old son a $14,000 Warhol painting. He'll probably just want to play with the box. [Us]
  • Kaitlin Olson and Rob McElhenney, a.k.a. Sweet Dee and Mac from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, are expecting their second child, another boy. "We found out I was pregnant during my mom's birthday weekend in Ojai. I was instantly so proud of this baby for already knowing how to make someone else's special day all about him." [People]
  • Here's an extended tour of the Stodden family photo album. See the oversexed youth transform before your very eyes. [Daily Mail]