Uhhhhhh. Ugggghhhh. Ummmmmmfffff. Dude we were like... what time is it? Fuck. Morning in America already?

Consumption of alcohol hit a 25-year high in 2010, when 67% of Americans reported drinking alcoholic beverages, according to a Gallup poll. That's a level unseen since the late 1970s, when 71% of Americans said they drank.

The seventies were fucking awesome. Don't. It's too early dude. I don't have to fucking justify myself. Shut up, SHUT UP. Dude I will seriously fuck you up, when I feel better, if you don't shut up. We were at the Sonic drive-thru, okay, and it was just like, why not. And we got more fucked up at Starbucks and Lenny got into a fight with some pussy Europeans and it was like, this is America, you know? So fucking wasted dude.

Shut up you stupid phone.

[USA Today. Photo: Vagabond Shutterbug/ Flickr]