Two Dollar Subway Sammiches!
Wait. Wait. Two dollars for a six inch long Subway submarine sandwich???? That's even... (*counts on fingers*)... cheaper than a five dollar one foot-long Subway submarine sandwich!! Absolutely nothing can ruin our altogether genuine enthusiasm for this development!
The [December-only] deal is good only on its popular meatball and cold-cut subs.
Not even that!
"It's a magical price point," says consumer psychologist Kit Yarrow. "What it communicates to consumers is that Subway is on their side."
Not even that!
Only two dollars?? Subway is on my side!
We apologize for this unabashed consumerist enthusiasm, and now return to your regularly scheduled reflexive loathing!