As any good astronomer will tell you, a star always burns brightest just before it dies. And Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino is certainly clinging onto his last drops of fame with every muscle in his steroid (and maybe painkiller) riddled body, following in the path of every D-lister before him, and posing nude shirtless for PETA.

Here are both versions of the ad: on the left, the "tame" version, on the right, "sexy." PETA's words, not mine. Since any major disaster is better digested in pieces, let's break it down.

First the face. Note how the eyes follow you, no matter where you go, not unlike the Mona Lisa. This is perhaps to suggest The Situation's move from the low-brow (reality television) into the high-brow (advertising). The Situation does not look directly at the camera, and his hat is tipped backwards. This is a subtle nod to where he's been and where he comes from.

The cat he is holding looks terrified. This is not surprising, and is a look DJ Pauly D will tell you is called the "last call at Karma."

That is, I guess, an Ace bandage? Perhaps it is a fashion statement born of necessity, as getting traction on the dance floor can be tricky after JWoww pees behind the bar.

OH MY GOD MONSTER!

In conclusion, neuter and spay your pets, kids, otherwise The Situation will break into your house and do it for you.

[Images via AP and PETA]